31st Century Fox

  • Season 7, Ep 12
  • 08/29/2012

After saving a robotic fox from hunters, Bender becomes the hunted.

♪ Two... two, three... ♪

Crew on deck.

How was thedelivery to Tokyo?

Not bad-- Mothzilla got intothe ship's closet, though.

Can we please getnew uniforms now, Professor?

You said you would replace thema year ago.

You can't expect me to honorwhat Year-Ago Professor said.

That guy was young and foolish.

There's nothing wrongwith these uniforms

that a few denimpatches won't fix.

(Professor andHermes screaming)

Oh, all right.

To the garmentdistrict.

(door opens, bell jingles)

Come in, come in.

Can I offer you maybe a nicemacaroon cut in seven pieces?

Oy, such a stereotype.

Yes, I'm looking forsomething in a space uniform

that's respectfullyhumiliating

but can come out ofan employee's salary

without his noticing.

You got it.

Tomorrow's clothesat yesterday's prices.

Ah, you can't go wrongwith a stillsuit.

It recycles your solid wasteinto a nice piece gefilte fish.

Ugh, is there a way to justkeep it as solid waste?

Now here's somethingwe can all agree on.


Ah, theStardoz 2293.

Not for everybody,but you pull it off.

Please don'tpull it off.

Yo, Squidward Scissorhands,

you got thisin an adult robot medium?

The foxhuntinguniform?

You, sir, must be arobot of noble bearings.

Well, I am descendedfrom Prince Albert's can.

I think we've seenenough.

Too much, actually.

Come on, let's trysomewhere else.

Wait, wait, perhaps discerningcustomers like yourselves

would be interested in an itemfrom our discount rack.

Quality isthe most important thing.

How much is it?

90% off.

An unpleasant fellow orderedthem last year but never paid.

Most unpleasant, that one.

That sounds like somethingYear-Ago Professor would do.

We'll take them.

Finally, a uniform I'd behappy to be caught dead in.

And, boy, does itwick away moisture--

gallonsand gallons of it.

Plus, they're stitchedin such a way that,

no matter what angleit's viewed from,

it looks like you're standingin hero wind.

I just wish my fistsweren't sewn to my belt.


Hey, what's Bender wearinginstead of that crap?

Oh, Lord.

Did you actually buythat getup?

We foxhunters do not stoopto buy getups.

I made free with it.

Since when do you care-- oreven know-- about foxhunting?

Foxhunting is an ancientand noble pursuit

that's fascinated me

ever since I first heard of itten minutes ago.

Noble pursuit?

What's noble about killinga defenseless animal?

Don't benaive, Leela.

We kill defenselessanimals all the time.

Look at Hermes'stortoise-shell glasses.

the Professor'swalrus-ivory teeth,

and don't forget thezebra-fur ship cozy.

(overlapping chatter)Yeah, I guess you're right.

He's got a point.

See, Leela, there are twosides to every shameful act.

What you call theatrocity of crazed dogs

tearing a helplessfox to shreds,

others call a pleasantjaunt in the park.

The first thing.

Come see for yourself.

Join me on the morrow as Iembark on my maiden hunt.

I said join me!

This is my bestprotest sign ever,

and it was easybecause I started

with a "save the ox" signI already had.

(horse neighs)

Wow, where'd youget the horse?

None of your business.

Young man, one does not drinkfrom a champagne fountain

in that manner.

But he's doing it.


Check out this dork.

I, sir, am the masterof the hunt

and I'll thank youto behave like a gentleman.

You're quite welcome, sir.


Ah, yes, foxhunting.

If there's one thing I know,it's everything about it.

What's that weird cat?

(groans) This is the foxwe'll be hunting today.

Wow, this is easierthan I thought.

The sport is inthe chase, sir.

The fox getsa 30-minute head start.

Man, it would have beenso much easier

to kill itin the cage.


Let the hunt begin.


(whooping raucously)

Stop, this is crueland inhumane.

Well, now, in all my yearsas a huntmaster

I've never seenanything like this.

I mean, lookat that sign.

It's magnificent.

(chuckling):Oh, thank you.

I used a ruler

and I erased all the pencillines when I was finished.


Now, into the ditchwith you.



So the dogs doall the work

while we sportsmen enjoya nice horsey ride?


I see you'vecaught the fever.

Keep your wits about you.

I've blanketed thesewoods with devious traps

to ward off poachersand protesters.

Stop the bloodshed,stop the violence.



I saw that comingfrom a mile away...!

(horse neighing)

(chuckles)Be more careful, friend.

My antigravity snaresare virtually undetectable.

I saw it coming from a mile a...

(Bender grunts, horse neighs)

View halloo, view halloo.

View halloo?All right.

What does that mean?

The fox has been sighted.


Oh, yeah, get that fox.

Go, dogs, go.


(horses neigh)

Eh, either way.

(fox whimpering, dogs barking)

Oh, God, thisis horrible.

I can't watch.

(scoffs) You humans always sayyou don't want to see violence,

but you know you do.

I defy you not to watch.

A robot fox?

Huh, I guess I'm okaywith this after all.

Well, I'm not.

Robot foxhunting is a crimeagainst robo-nature.

Stop the bloodshed,stop the viol...



How can you do this to a poor,defenseless robot animal?

You people are sick, andyou foxhounds are no better.

They're not foxhounds.

They're springer spaniels,you twit.

Or ratherspring-powered spaniels.

(gasps)Bot-on-bot violence?

Where will it end?

Not with the dogs.

Come here, Sea Gasket.




You, sir, area heartless monster,

and you will ruethe day you met me.

Also, can I getmy parking validated?

The time has come to endinjustice against robot animals.


No dog track rabbit should beused to test cosmetics,

no robot cowshould have to be milked

by a milking machine,

and no milking machineshould have to milk a robot cow.

Those injusticesdon't even exist.

Then, let's find some that do.

Robot chickens weren't madeto be jammed in cubicles

and forced to lay eggs.

Actually,they was.


I'll save you.

Run free, sweet robo-hen.


Enough with the tenderizing.

It's time for a Benderizing.

Hey, you peoplecan't just burst in like that

and cut off my hand.

You got to take a number.

Shooting innocent robot ducksis wrong.

Fly away.

Fly away, my pretties.



Congratulations, Bender,

you've ended robotanimal cruelty

within a 20-yard radiusof this building.

You ready tocall it a day,

or do you have onemore score to settle?

The second thing.


HUNTMASTER:The weekly hunt

is hereby called to order.

(enthusiastic chatter)

I'll drink some more to that.

As always, once Irelease the fox,

it will have a 30-minutehead start before...


(angry chatter)

Stop the hunt.

Oh! You again.

I'm back, snooty.

We're here to liberatethat robot fox,

and that's whatwe're gonna do.


Uh, you mind showing mehow to open the cage?

Now, listen here, the huntis a hallowed tradition,

and you Bambi-lovingbeatniks will never stop it.

Oh, no?

Well, for your information,

the robot fox has been declaredan endangered robo-species.

This injunction suspends allrobot foxhunting for 24 hours

while our motionis under consideration.

We'll see you in court.


Motion destroyed.

The hunt shall resume at sunup.


He's crooked, but fair.

I'm not giving up yet.

I am.I already did.

You can count on me.

Now here's the plan.

We're going to sneak onto thegrounds and free that fox.

Can we stop for ice creamon the way back?

All right, fine.

And on the way there?

(whispering):Okay, I'll hold the ice creamwhile you two go over.


Where's the ice cream?

(whispers):There was a bear.



Okay. You guys take himback to Planet Express.

I've got one more shenaniganup my sleeve.

But you promised usway-back ice cream.

Oh, here.

But no chocolate--it's bedtime.

With that odious robotbarred from the grounds,

the weekly hunt is hereby calledonce more to order.

Let the hunt begin.

(other gasping)

(shocked murmuring)

You, sir, have been outfoxed.

I spent all night on that.

It's clever.

Nevertheless,I demand you return my fox.

Sorry, mutton-chump.

No fox, no hunt.

Oh, really?


(gun cocks)

Let the hunt begin!

(other agreeing)

Sir, I leave youwith this one final thought.

(panicked screaming)

(screaming continues)

Oh, God, they're gonna kill me,El Roboto Mas Importante.

And I only havea 30 minute head start.

Uh-oh, a fork in the path.


There's more places to hidein that dark forest.

On the other hand, I could runfaster through that open meadow.

But of course,the forest might protect

my fair robot skin from sunburn.


(buzzer sounds)

(bugle plays, dogs barking)

Today, we hunt the mostdangerous game--

aside from lawn darts--

a cunning robotic adversaryso deviously clever that...

Oh, for God's sake.

Then again, a nicerun through a meadow,

who could sayno to that?


(snarling, Bender whimpering)

Look here.Hunting is a team effort,

and you're not pullingyour weight.

Now I'm going to be sporting

and give you one more chanceto run.


Nothing's more importantthan sportsmanship.


(laughs deviously)


It's so cute.

Horseshoe crab cute.

(Fry laughs, others murmuring)

Fox news, everyone.

I've decided to make the foxour new corporate mascot.

Hear, hear.

Let's put on our new uniforms

and take a staff photofor the newsletter.

Right on!

Here they are,freshly laundered and...

(Hermes gasps, fox snarling)

(other gasping)


Our magnificent uniforms--they're ruined.


And he peed on thelocker room floor.

That's my territory.

Also got in the henhouse

and killed Amy's prize-winningRhode Island Red.

Not Penelope.

Cute or not,I'll kill that robo-rat.

(Amy yells, fox whimpers)

(Fry screams)

FRY:Let me at it.

I'm gonna pound itwith this chewed-up old stick.


It's just a poor, scaredwild robot.

What did you expect?


My sign.It's ruined.

Kill the fox.

(Leela grunting)

(angry shouting)




Missed it by that much.

(dogs barking)


Oh, no, they caught my scent.

I better throw them off byrubbing myself with something.


Ow! That's no good.

Wait, I know what'll confusethose dogs.


(cats snarling, Bender yelling)

(Bender yelling)

You have made yourself an enemy,my friend!

Dang it. He jumped on thePATH train to New Jersey.

Of course.

He's commuting backto his native habitat.

(panting wearily)

(sighs heavily)

On top of everything,I'm starving.

I'll have to carve a sandwichout of this tree branch.

Ow! My finger.

I wish I remembered moresurvival skills from Boy Scouts.

Too bad my only merit badgewas in interpretive dance.


I can use the universal languageof dance to signal for help.



That was my second favoriteankle.

(grunting,dogs barking in distance)

(bugle plays)

Was that a horn?

Are those the dogs?

(rustling)Is that two caterpillarsmaking sweet love?

(fox barks, Bender screams)

(Fox panting)

Aw, you know what it's liketo feel hunted, too, eh, buddy?

Would it be too muchto ask you to stay with me

in my final momentsand die at my side?

And you die first?


You lousy son of a...!(metallic clanking)

Oh, I get it.You freed me.

(electrical crackling)You lousy son of a...!

(fox panting, Bender grunting)

(galloping hoofbeats)

(horses neighing, dogs barking)

We're hot on his heels.


One of his heels.

(ship approaching,horses neighing

Oh, these guys.

Can I help you?

Out of our way,this fox is ours.


Ah, yes.Have at it.

We're not hunting fox today.

Wait a second,what are you hunting?

(dogs whimpering)

Oh, my God.

It's Bender'smiddle finger.

I'd recognize this anywhere.

(gasps sharply)

(snarling, barking)

What is it, little buddy?

Is it a layer cake?

Or maybe World Series tickets?

A trip wire, hmm?

But who's tripping who?


(laughing maniacally)

Wait-- whom.

Who's tripping whom?

(laughing maniacally)

I guess what I've been tryingto say is,

we should all be ashamed.

Me for my hatred of a mechanicalfox that tore up my sign--

and who I'd like to throttle--

and you,for hunting an innocent robot.

Well, a robot who didn'tharm you personally.



But most of all,I blame you, Huntmaster.

Where's the huntmaster?

Remember when you said"nobody leave"

and then you turned your headbriefly?

He left an hour before that.

(chuckles deviously)




Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa,whoa-whoa-whoa!


You disappoint me, Bender.

I'd've thought you'dhave learned to avoid

my antigravitysnares by now.

I did.

Too bad you didn't.


Ye gods!

(screaming, grunts)

How does it feelto be the hunted?

To be forever lookingover your shoulder,

like an owlwith that type of neck?

To die in agony

at the hands of the world'sgreatest lover?

(cocks gun)No! Please!

I can't shoot you.

Bender, I found yourtrigger finger.

Ah, now I can.

(cocks gun)

But I won't.

Not with so many witnesses.

You're a true gentleman.

Unlike me.



(fox snarling,Huntmaster yelling)

(gasps):I can't watch...


(snarling)Oh, no!


Hey, wait a minute.

(electrical crackling)

He was also a robot? Dude!

So a robot foxkilled a robot human?

Eh, I guessthat makes it okay.


Killing of any kind is...

I don't know, well...

Let me think about this.



I guess it's okay.