Steve the Fearless Pilot

  • Season 3, Ep 8
  • 11/04/2014

A hypnotism accident causes Steve to believe that he's a pirate, and Denzel and Connie get stranded on a desert island.

- THANKS FOR HELPING MEWITH SPRING CLEANING, MALLOY.

- THIS IS A WEIRD COMIC BOOK. KLAN MAN?

- OH, KLAN MAN.

ACROSS THE AIR,ACROSS THE SEA,

AND A CROSS ON YOUR LAWN.[chuckles]

OH, YOU SHOULD'VE SEENLYNCH LADY.

OOH, SHE WASA REAL PIECE OF ASS.

- WHOA. LOOK AT ALLTHIS COOL STUFF YOU CAN BUY.

X-RAY GLASSES, SPY PENS,SEA MONKEYS,

AND A REAL ROCKET SHIPFOR ONLY TWO BUCKS?

- [chuckles]OH, MALLOY.

IT'S ALL NOVELTY BULLSHITTO TRICK LITTLE KIDS.

NONE OF THAT CRAP EVER WORKED.

- THIS IS AMERICA.

THEY COULDN'T ADVERTISESOMETHING IF IT WASN'T TRUE.

[keypad beeping]

[telephone rings]

- AAH!NOVELTY BULLSHIT.

LOU, WE GOT AN ORDER!

- SO LAST NIGHTWHEN MY GIRL SAID

SHE WANTED TO SLIP INTOSOMETHING MORE COMFORTABLE,

I DIDN'T KNOWSHE MEANT A COMA.

[laughing]

HEY, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?THAT'S FUNNY.

I MEAN, IT'S SAD, TOO,'CAUSE SHE DIED.

- I'M SICKOF BEING CALLED UGLY, DENZEL.

THERE'S ONLY SO MUCHA GIRL CAN TAKE.

ONE DAY I'M GONNA SNAP,AND WHEN I DO...

- CALM DOWN.AT LEAST I APPRECIATE YOU.

- REALLY?- SURE.

UGLY PEOPLE LIKE YOU EXISTTO MAKE PEOPLE APPRECIATE

HANDSOME PEOPLE LIKE ME.

- I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!

both: AAH!

AAH!

[water splashes]

- [inhales deeply]HAHH.

- AAH!WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

- I WAS SAVING YOUR LIFE.

- NEXT TIME LET ME DIE!WHERE THE HELL ARE WE?

- LOOKS LIKEA DESERTED ISLAND.

- DAMN,IT'S JUST LIKE MY DREAM,

ONLY YOU AIN'T CLORIS LEACHMANWITH A HOT WING FOR A CLITORIS.

- I'M SCARED, DENZEL.

WHAT IF NO ONEEVER FINDS US HERE?

I'LL DIE A VIRGIN!UNLESS...

- YEAH, I'M GONNA BE REAL SADAT YOUR VIRGIN FUNERAL.

[engine revving]