Severance

  • Season 1, Ep 1
  • 03/25/2015

After their parents ask them to move out, filmmaker brothers Jack and Ben devise a bogus ransom to raise money for their next movie.

Huh? Huh?

Graves!

Cool off, buddy.I got this one.

No! No!Ow. Ow.

No!

Goddamn it! Will you--cut the camera, Del.

Mom, we're rightin the middle of shooting!

Well, I'm sorry, I didn't know.

Well, you gotta be more careful.

Fortino?

Hey, Mr. Alan.

What did I tell youabout using Fortino?

He's supposed to berepotting my azaleas.

Lo siento, Miss Diana. I'm-- I'mgonna go back to the azaleas.

No. Oh, Fortino.

What happened to allthe stuff that was in here?

Oh... Del? Why'd you movetheir stuff?

I didn't.

Yeah, you did. Del, you'replaying Rodrigo.

Back to one!

Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Dolfe!

Mi gusto chili con carne?

That was so... good.

I mean, that looksfreaking incredible.

Del, you were even good.

This is a game changer!That was insane!

I mean, we post thisto the internet.

We catch the eye of a celeb,maybe like Steven Spielberg...

and we might be set, man.

Forget Spielberg! We're likeSteve Jobs in the late '70's!

We're just tinkering perfectionand just taking over the world!

Oh, and Del's like the guy theycut out of the company...

before it took off.

[BEN]I think that guy killed himself.

Okay.I'm serious, though, man...

if we do go further, you'reprobably not gonna be there...

because you haven't putin much work.

But... probably, though, with anice severance package, though.

Yeah, yeah...

I mean, maybe likea five percent cut...

and an NDA to take a walk.

Ooh...But, but, yeah...

that's-- you know,so, head's up.

[DIANA]Boys! Dinner!

Alan, you're their father.

I think they shouldhear it from you.

I-- I-- I just...

I-- I feel like theyrespect you a lot more.

Oh, don't be ridiculous, honey,of course, they respect you.

Dinner! Oh, whoa! Awesome!Are we having steak?

Nice!

Hi, boys.Uh, guys?

Uh, before everybodystarts eating--

What kind of special occasion--A special meal?

What is this?There's something that'sreally very important.

Why do you always geta bigger piece than me?

And, uh--Okay, Jack, do you wantme to switch?

Would that make you happy?Boys!

Yeah.

Your father is tryingto tell you something.

Yeah.

Uh, your motherand I have been talking...

Yeah.

And we've been talkingextensively.

[JACK]Yeah.

And uh, well--

Can you spit it out, then,'cause we're so hungry.

Jack, just let me finish.

Dad, we know whatyou're gonna say.

No, you don't knowwhat I'm going to say.

Yes, we do, it's gonna besomething useless...

because you're doing the thing,that stuttering thing.

No, excuse me, I promise you donot know what I will say.

Alan, just tell them.

We want you boys to moveout and find jobs.

You want us to-- what was it?

What did you say?

We want you to move outand find--

[BLEEP] you, Dad!

Jack Christopher!

What are you justkicking us to the curb?

I know it's hard, but if you--

No! You shut your mouth,you piece of [BLEEP]!

Is this about space, Mom?

There would be so much morespace if you just divorced Dad!

Yeah, he's thecrappiest dad ever!

I'm not divorcing your father!

Did I ever tell youhe molested me?

What?I did not!

What is wrong with you?You pervert!

Don't say this!

Did he touch you?No!

He touched my penis!Stop it! Sit down!

I did not! This is a lie!

Oh, keep your mouth shut,you diddler!

I did not diddle him!

Boys! It's time for youto grow up!

Look, fellas, we lovethe little videos you guys do.

What? Little videos?Great.

Why? Why would you tearthis family apart?

Honey, I can't do this.What's happening to this family?

Boys!

A decision has been made.There is no discussion.

You have two weeksto move out.

May I please havethe sour cream?

But, Mom--Thank you, Alan.

You did a wonderful job.Thank you.

Hey... you're dead to me.

Who wants salad? Hmm?