February 24, 2016 - Bill Nye on Haters & Apple vs. the FBI

  • 02/24/2016

Bill Nye puts a controversy to rest, and Larry discusses Apple's refusal to help the FBI hack a terrorist's phone with Eddie George, Rory Albanese and Franchesca Ramsey.

Thank you very much.

-(cheering continues)-Oh, thank you very much.

-(crowd chanting "Larry!")-Very kind. Very kind.

Thank you so much. Thank you.

So kind.Welcome to The Nightly Show.

I am Larry Wilmore.

So you guys know, I talkedto the audience before the show,

and, uh, "Hey, man,could you mention my birthday?

I was here last year."Sure, sure. No problem.

What's your name?Manny? Okay.

"Could you mention my birthday, too?"

Oh, yeah.What's your name? Peyton?

(laughter)

You guys are (bleep) with me,I know you are.

But happy birthday, anyway.

Manny and Peyton,happy birthday, y'all.

-(cheering, applause) -Allright, so let's get right to it.

I'm sure you guys have all beenfollowing the big iPhone case.

Um, not the 6 Plus case.

I don't meanthat big iPhone case.

Uh, but the one whereApple and the government

are in a fightover your privacy.

NEWSMAN: A federal court ordering Apple

to unlock the San Bernardino terrorists' iPhone.

And this morning, Tim Cook, their CEO,

telling the Feds, "Get lost!"

"Get lost"?

Um, don't worry, Tim Cook,

if the governmentis using Apple maps,

-they will definitely get lost.-(laughter)

-(applause) -Not gonna be...not gonna be hard.

-(whooping)-Burn!

Apple burn!

Uh... (laughs)

So, here's the deal.

The FBI can't getinto this terrorist's phone,

yet somehow, I don't know,I feel like if there were

naked pictures ofJennifer Lawrence in this phone,

it would've been hacked,like, 10,000 times by now.

Right?But they're the FBI, okay?

So why can't they get in?

NEWSWOMAN: The FBI needs Apple's help

because the security settings on the phone

lock the device if a password is entered incorrectly

too many times.

Jesus. Man.

The next Mission Impossible movie

is gonna be, like,six minutes long.

(laughter)

Sorry, there'sa four-digit code. (sighs)

We're (bleep)ed!

Mm-mm. All right,so what's the FBI's plan?

NEWSWOMAN: The FBI wants Apple to upload software

that lets its analysts get around the security features

and take as many shots at the passcode as necessary

to unlock Syed Farook's iPhone.

Ah, right. So the FBI doesn'tjust want Apple to let them in,

they want Apple to createan entirely new software

to allow them accessto the phone.

Um, there's actuallya word for this.

Um, it's being called--what is that? Uh...

...backdoor access...

NEWSMAN: ...backdoor access...

...backdoor access...

...and if one group gets

backdoor access, does anothergroup get backdoor access?

Backdoor access. Right.

Okay, um, this all seemspretty complicated,

so we brought in someone to helpus get to the bottom of this.

So please welcomebackdoor expert,

Brance Crantly.

(cheering, applause)

WILMORE:Uh...

Great. Uh, so, Brance,

what's the governmentdoing wrong here?

Look, Larry,it's pretty simple, man.

When you're asking for accessto the backdoor,

you know, you can't come onso strong, baby.

You can't have all the FBIand federal court orders.

You know,you got to start slow, man.

You got to set the mood,

create an environment of trust,you know?

Maybe give a little access to your backdoor first, you know?

Show 'em how cool you arewith it.

You get it, man.

(laughter)

(whooping, applause)

That's how it works, baby.

Are you actually a tech expert?

No, I-I don't know, man--I just got an e-mail

saying you needed someone whoknew a lot about the backdoor.

You know, that's my thing.I'm the "Backdoor Guy."

-That's what people call me for,Larry. -Okay, enough.

All right, we don't need you.Get out of here.

-What! I'm not done, Larry!-Backdoor expert, uh...

Brance Crantly,whatever his name is, everybody.

(cheering, applause)

Just learned nothing from him.

Okay. So, this fightover whether or not

Apple should help the FBI accessthe phone, it's really complex.

On the one side,Apple says that doing this

will createa dangerous precedent.

If they develop a key thatcould gain access to your phone,

I mean, who's to say that key

won't landin the wrong hands, right?

And on the other side,the government's position is,

they just want to lookat a dead terrorist's phone.

You know,to prevent future attacks.

Let me put it in other words.In other words,

the government's like, "Whycan't I look at your phone?"

(laughter)

"Hmm?

Why I can't?"

And Apple's all like,"Baby, baby, come on, now.

"Why you got to lookat my phone?

All I do is make calls.Why do you got to look at it?"

And then the government'sall like, "Well,

"if that's all you're doing,why can't I look at your phone?

You got something in thereyou don't want me to see? Huh?"

And then Apple's all like,"Uh...

"well, yeah, maybe I gota surprise coming for you, baby.

"Maybe I got picturesof presidents for you

"on that phone.

"What was the nameof that restaurant you like?

Let's go there tonight,baby. Yeah."

That pretty much explains itin a nutshell.

Uh, but I'll tell you what,I'll tell you what.

Let's let some experts weigh in.

NEWSWOMAN: Former NSA director, Michael Hayden,

tells USA Today he agrees with the government

on this specific case but not on the broader issue

of a so-called "backdoor."

I think, on balance,that actually harms

American safety and security.

Whoa. So the former directorof the NSA

thinks this is problematic.

Let that sink in, you guys.

The data-scoopiest data scooper

that ever data-scooped

is like, "This issome scary-ass data scoopin'."

That's pretty terrifying.

All right, who else?

Bill Gates this morningis backing the government

in its fight with Apple.

We want a governmentthat has visibility,

and we trust it to usethat visibility on our behalf.

Well, this is odd.

So, the ex-head of Microsoft

is in favor of doing somethingthat might hurt Apple?

Hmm.

Of course he is!

Bill Gates is like,"Wait, hold on--

"I can be patriotic and (bleep) Apple?

Are you kidding me?Where do I sign up?"

(hums)

(sighs)

It's so obvious.(grunts)

You know, by the way, you guys,

has anyone... has anyonethought to ask Siri

what she thinks about all this?

Can't we just...Let's see.

Uh, hey, Siri, um,

have you heard of thisterrorist, uh, phone thing?

Uh, what should Apple do?

SIRI:Just open that asshole's phone.

I mean, seriously, Apple.

Wow, I didn't know you'd have

such a strong feelingabout this, Siri.

SIRI: By the way,would you like me to continue

your Google searchof "backdoor access"?

Oh, no, no, no, no,that's unnecessary.

Please erasemy search history, Siri.

Thank you very much.Thank you. Um...

Whew.

Now, this caseseems pretty simple

when you're justfocusing on one phone.

That's what the governmentkeeps saying.

We-we just wantto unlock this one phone.

But it's not entirelythe whole story.

The government is trying to getinto at least 12 other phones,

and they're not allhigh-profile terrorism cases.

One request would allow thegovernment to search the phone

of a guy who's suspectedof possessing meth.

Government, you'rewasting your time here.

I can tell you what'son that meth head's phone.

Right?Like, a Google search

for how much is a machine...

washing machine door worthat a pawn shop. Uh...

directions to the junkyardat the edge of town.

And an e-prescriptionfor, like, super gonorrhea.

That's pretty muchwhat's gonna be there.

It's a horrible strain,apparently.

Sorry. I just, for the firsttime, imagined that.

I didn't imagine it...during our rehearsal.

But, clearly, guys,this is a Pandora's box.

And it's a slippery slope.

It's a Pandora's boxon a slippery slope.

-(man groans)-I'd like to trust the gov...

Oh, sorry.

And I'd like to trustthe government on this.

But come on, guys, it'sthe government.

It's the government.

They're the boy who cried "giveme your data" at this point.

And what bugs me--what really bugs me about this--

is the government is falling allover itself to change the rules

on this device involvedin the San Bernardino shooting,

but not this device involvedin the San Bernardino shooting.

We'll be right back.

Hi, I'm Holly Walkerkeeping black history 100

for The Nightly Show.

Did you know thatthe United States wasn't

the worst offender when it cameto importing African slaves?

That honor goes to Brazil,

with almost five million slaves,

compared to the USA's 400,000.

And that's why I refuseto get a Brazilian bikini wax.

Grow it to show it, ladies.

Happy Black History Month.

Hey, welcome back.Okay, so, guys...

so I took some questionson the Internet recently,

and, uh, some peoplewere upset about a show

I did back in September.Now, that didn't

necessarily surprise me,because we tackle

a lot of difficult subjectson this show.

I mean, the second show we didwas about Bill Cosby's

"alleged even though I thinkhe really did it" raping.

That's right, I haven'tforgotten about you, (bleep).

I have not.Still... still in here.

But we talked about...I mean, we talked about

cops killing unarmed black kids,

the mistreatment of women,

I mean, the Flint water crisis.I get it.

These are topics-- they're gonnastir up some controversy.

So, anyhow, um,so on this particular date,

we were talking about,uh, water on Mars,

and understandably,some people got very upset.

Uh... They thought...

they thought we disrespectedand kept interrupting our guest,

scientist Bill Nye.And a couple commenters

even accused meof being anti-science.

Listen, guys,I love science, okay?

When I was a kid, I mean,I wanted to be an astronaut.

I still wear science pajamas.

I do.

Not many guyscan pull that look off.

But I am-I am fascinatedby discoveries of all kind.

And I love it when I see kidsinterested in science.

The-the last thingI would ever want to do

is be disrespectfulof a guy who loves science.

Ladies and gentlemen,I'm a blerd. I am a black nerd.

I love... Right?

I love science, I love Bill Nye.Love me some Bill Nye.

-(cheering, applause) -I love,uh, sci... scientific...

-Oh, my God! Oh!-Hey.

-Hey, it's Bill Nye.-Good to see you.

Bill Nye, everybody!Have a seat, Bill.

Oh, my God.

It is Bill Nye.Bill, um...

I don't know if you heardwh-what I was just saying. Uh...

Oh, I heard you,Larry. I heard it

-through the scienceof television. -Oh.

A-And not only that,I was... I was, uh,

-standing right over there.-Yeah, of course, yeah. Yeah,

-yeah. Science of proximityis what that was. -Yeah.

Okay, now, Bill,when you were here,

I mean, you didn't feeldisrespected, did you?

Larry, Larry,it's a comedy show.

You're thinking about thistoo much.

-Let me put thisin scientific terms. -Okay.

Haters gonna hate.

You...

Larry...

you just got to letthat (bleep) go.

Hey...those are scientific terms?

-Yes.I am quoting Copernicus. -Oh.

"Let that (bleep) go."He really said that.

-But... but it was in Latin.-I know.

-It was in Latin. -He-hesaid it in Latin originally,

but it translatesto "let that (bleep) go."

Okay, great.Okay, great, I just wanted...

So we've cleared the air?'Cause, I mean, people thought

we were interrupting you,not letting you speak, I mean...

-Larry, there's no air to clear.We're good. -Okay. Great.

In fact, actually, you know,

since I'm here, there isone more thing I wanted

to mention about water on Mars.You know, there are

-these weeping craters, andthere's also -Oh, sorry, Bill.

-ice in the polar...-We don't have any more time.

Bill Nye, everybody!

That's all from Bill Nye!

Thanks a lot for coming, Bill!That's so nice!

-We got to go. Bill Nye,everybody! -That's all?

Give him a nice hand! But we gotto go! We don't have any time!

Bill Nye! So nice of himto come out. Thanks, Bill!

-Thank you. He was so nice.Whew. -(cheering and applause)

Well... Such a great guy,

Interrupted him.Give me a break.

Okay, guys.So, the Oscars are Sunday,

and there's been a lotof controversy

over the lack of diversity.I mean, personally,

I feel like many of the majorroles could have been played

by actors of color.

Or could they?

Have a look.

The accident that took the lifeof astronaut Mark Watney

was a tragedy. But thoughhis body remains on Mars,

the spirit of this braveexplorer will remain with us,

his family here on Earth.

Forever. Thank you.

(clamoring)

-Tough day, boss.-The toughest.

(static)

Boss?

You're gonna want to see this.

I think I got a transmission.

WATNEY:Hello? Hello?

Can anybody hear me? Hello?

This is Astronaut Mark Watney.

-I am alive.-I'll be goddamned.

Son of a bitch made it through.

It's a miracle. Oh, my God!

(cheering, laughter)

Let's bring him home, boys.

Let's do whatever it takesto get Mark Watney back on...

You know, uh, it'd bereally hard to bring him back.

Like, super hard.

Yeah, and I-I literally just didthat press conference,

like, a minute ago.So it'd be weird

to, like, do another one. Youknow? What are you gonna do?

Hey, I grew potatoesto stay alive!

I figured out how to make water!

I did it, guys! I did it!

Send somebody to get me!

-It's not like he's Matt Damon.-Wait, what?

-It's just gonna cost too much,I feel like. -Yeah.

-Is he worth the money?And... he's not. -Yeah.

What the (bleep)?! You hear me!I know you hear me!

-Son of a bitch! -So,uh, who wants some lunch, huh?

-Yeah! -Oh, yeah.-That's a great idea. -Yes!

-Such a long day.-What does everybody feel like?

-Chinese food?-I had Chinese last night.

-What about Antonio's?-Antonio's closed.

-What? What?-Yeah. -Weeks ago.

That's devastating news. That isheartbreakingly devastating.

-Gary wants Indian. -Well,why don't we just do food court?

And how 'bout this? I'm buyin'.

(cheering, whooping)

Yes! Yes!

Guys! Hello?

What the hell is going on?!You hear me!

-You see me! What... -Oh,yeah, I'm starving. Thank you.

-Really?!-We really earned it.

Even the black dudeis gonna leave?!

Wow!

(cheering and applause)

We'll be right back!

Welcome back!I'm here with my panel.

First up, Nightly Show Contributor Rory Albanese.

(cheering and applause)

And Nightly Show ContributorFranchesca Ramsey.

(cheering and applause)

And he isa former Heisman Trophy winner,

Pro Bowl, uh, NFL running back,

and now the current star of themusical Chicago, Eddie George,

-you guys.-(cheering and applause)

And for everyone at home,join our conversation right now

on Twitter, @NightlyShow,using the hashtag, #Tonightly.

Okay, so I want to talk aboutthis whole, uh, Apple thing,

um, versus the governmentthat's happening right now,

trying to hack into the SanBernardino terrorists' phone.

Okay, how does... Does anybodyhere think Apple should do this?

-No. -Who's on this side?You say no.

-No, I'm gonna say no.-I say yes. -You say yes.

I-I think...I think it's okay to...

I mean, if Apple should, uh...Oh, you know what,

-I-I retract. I think that...-Okay. Take it slow.

Yeah, man. Take it slow.Nice and slow.

-Slow down.-That's all right.

I think the governmentshould be able to get into it,

-because, I mean, this day andage that we live in, -Mm-hmm.

it's-it's, uh... very dangerous.

-Mm-hmm. -I mean, thingsare happening out of nowhere.

People getting shot. And I thinkit's, um, totally appropriate

for them to have access to it.

I mean, strike a balancebetween the two.

I mean, I'd rather havethe-the FBI

going in-into my personal phoneversus my wife.

-Uh...-I'm just saying, you know?

But what feels like the moreimportant issue, privacy

-or safety? -I mean,I feel like they-they...

This is what always happenswith this. It's like they try

-to scare us and then we makebad decisions. -Mm-hmm.

It happened... exactlywhat happened after 9/11.

We went to Iraq, 'causewe're all scared. But that was

a mistake. You know what I mean?I feel like they do that a lot

-though. No, it's true. It'slike... -(cheering and applause)

No, they try to scare us,and, like, now they're doing...

now they're doing this.They're like, "Well..."

We just... we just got the NSA--

'cause of Snowden letting usknow that this was happening

and now, of course, he'sa wanted man 'cause he told us--

-but, like, we just stoppedthem. -Yeah, he's a snitch.

Yeah, but we just stoppedthem... we just stopped 'em

from looking in our stuff,and, like, now, a year later,

they're like,"Uh, maybe a little more access

would be nice." No, (bleep) you.Like, leave us alone, you know?

-I don't know. I don't know.-Yeah. -Uh... No, I disagree.

-You feel the opposite.-Yeah, I-I think... I think,

given where we arein this society,

when random acts are happening,of-of violence are happening,

we should be ableto find out what's going on.

I don't mind that. I mean,a-again, I mean, I have...

I have children. I mean, Ihave-- they go to s-- Vanderbilt

and-and, uh...and-and, um... and grade school.

And we've got to be able to stopthis some way, somehow.

-But, see, that's... -But youhave to strike a balance

-between the two. -But...Now, you're running...

you-you're starting, like,a wealth management company

-or something like that.Eddie's, like, the most... -Yes.

-He's, like, this ridiculous-Seriously. He's like,

-Renaissance man.-"When I'm not playing football

-and singing on Broadway..."-Yes. Exactly.

Well, I don't play footballanymore.

-Well, okay. -Yeah. Yeah.-Singing on Broadway,

wealth management company--it's really awesome.

But aren't you concerned,like a company like that,

when there are keys to get intoinformation, you can be hacked.

I mean, you know, China, Russiaare gonna be the first

buyers of this key,

-you know, if it's developed.-I mean, they can do it now.

I think there are hackers outthere now that can get into it.

-RAMSEY: Yeah.-So it's not totally, um, safe.

But what I think... what I'msaying in terms of our safety

-and where we are...-WILMORE: Mm-hmm.

I mean, over the last five,ten years,

we're having more and morerandom acts of violence

at our schools, post office,Navy bases.

Yeah, but that speaksto a very specific point

about the type of securitythat we're looking for,

because we're scaredabout brown terrorists,

but not white ones, becauseif you look at the numbers...

(applause and cheering)

...in reality, the peoplewho are shooting up the schools,

the highest instancesin the past ten years,

in the post-9/11 society, havebeen White Supremacist groups,

have beenanti-government groups.

And so,when we talk about security,

I see increased security forpeople that don't look American.

And then, I see other people notgetting that increased security

the same way that the shoe...

GEORGE:Well, I-I see... I don't see

violence having any color.

-I mean, violence is violence,evil is evil. -Absolutely not.

But I don't thinkthat we police in that way.

But I don't see violence andiPhones. I don't connect that.

-I connect violence with guns.-Well, but...

You know, that's...but that's the thing.

-That's another issue.-That was weird. We always go...

-I think, yeah, that's a wholeother issue. -Exactly, yes.

-(cheers and applause)-No, but it's like,

you know, you said it earlier,about the government's reaction

is, like, "Oh, people areshooting people.

We need to get getinto your phones." What?

Like, how does that... what doesthat have to do with my phone?

-GEORGE: Yeah. -Mm-hmm. -I don'thave a gun or a phone,

I mean, or a...I have stuff on my phone.

-I guess I should say that.-GEORGE: Yeah, yeah, we all do.

Like, there's a lot ofeggplant emojis in my texts...

WILMORE: Well, it seems,as we were saying,

it seems like the governmentwants as much information

as possible unlessthat information involves

-your ownership of guns.-Yeah. -Exactly.

Yeah, I mean, look, to me,

once they hacked Ashley Madison,we knew nothing was safe.

-WILMORE: Right, exactly. -Youknow what I mean? That was...

The government.

And the government gets hackedall the time.

I mean, like, an 11-year-oldhacked them recently,

-or a 20-year-old.Remember that? -WILMORE: Yeah.

-Like, a stoner who hacked theCIA. No, there... -(laughter)

It was. It was, like, a stonerwho hacked the CIA.

It was, like, "Yeah, I thoughtit would be funny, man."

That also tells you...

-It's, like, "Yeah, that waspretty funny." -WILMORE: Right.

That also tells youthat the government only has PCs

-and not Apples, because...-That's a good point.

I think that that kind of isthe bigger thing here

is Apple's not being ableto be hacked.

WILMORE:Let me ask you this.

If we thought.... like, let's doa different scenario.

Let's gowith your security question.

If there was, like,possible evidence that...

of a nuclear bomb or somethingthat was on that phone,

would you be for the governmentbreaking...?

Well, I mean,the government's telling us...

WILMORE:I'm just using a wild card.

But the government's telling usit's evidence.

-You got to trust... -WILMORE:You don't trust them anyway.

You know, I trust themwith a grain of salt,

but I also feel like,my biggest issue is this.

Is the government always wantsto know what we're doing,

-but they never tell uswhat they're up to. -(applause)

-WILMORE: Yeah. Yeah. -So that'swhat it is, so I feel like

it should be... There should betransparency on both ends.

Like, if you want to look at myphone, I want to meet an alien.

So what would you want to knowfrom the government?

-I want to meet an alien.-(laughter)

What would you likefrom the government?

Everybody's gotto know everything.

Nothing's gonna be secret,y'all.

-(laughter)-We'll be right back.

(cheers and applause)

ANNOUNCER: If you live in the New York City area

or are planning to visit, grab some free tickets to:

Thanks to my panelists--

Rory Albanese,Franchesca Ramsey, Eddie George.

And special thanksto Bill Nye the Science Guy.

-(applause and cheering)-Yeah.

Okay, we're almost out of time,but before we go,

I'm gonna Keep It 100, you guys.Keep It 100.

Right? Okay, tonight's questionis from @whypick1.

They ask, "You're runningfor president in 2020." Great.

"Which of your contributors doyou pick as your running mate?

-#KeepIt100." -Uh.-(Ramsey clears her throat)

You guys are dividing meagainst my staff again.

All right, I got to gofor the youth vote.

She's standing right next to me.Franchesca Ramsey right here.

-Yes! Keep It 100! Yes!-(applause and cheering)

Come on. Thanks for watching.

Don't forget to ask me your KeepIt 100 questions on Twitter.

-Yes! -I'm not stupid!I'm not stupid!

She's standing right here.

Good Nightly, everyone!

-Yeah!-(cheers and applause)

MAN: Ooh, sorry.