Sponsored by Stamps

  • Season 2, Ep 4
  • 02/04/2014

Mikey and Tunes experience culture shock while visiting an American university, Nash Rickey tries to reunite his old band, and Ref Jeff makes a new friend.

- I'M NOT HERETO MAKE FRIENDS.

- I AIN'T GONNA MAKEONE FRIEND.

- I'M JUST HERE TO WIN.I'M NOT HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS.

- OKAY.

- NO.

YOU'RE HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS.

MAKING FRIENDSIS THE NAME OF THIS SHOW.

- ♪ YOU AND ME FOREVER

- OKAY, I GOT TO LOOK OUTFOR NUMBER ONE.

- OKAY, THAT'S NOT TRUE.

YOU WOULD LOSE IF YOU LOOK OUTFOR NUMBER ONE.

- HEY, LOOK, DUDE,THAT'S YOUR OPINION.

- DOES ANYBODY KNOWWHAT WE'RE DOING HERE?

- I LOCKED DOWN PLANS,CHICKS, GUYS.

YOU KNOW, I DIDN'T EVEN KNOWTHIS WAS A COMPETITION.

JUST SAW A SIGNFOR MAKING FRIENDS

AND THOUGHT THAT WOULDBE COOL.

- YOU SEE, THIS WOULD BEA GOOD TIME TO MAKE A FRIEND.

- I'M JEFF, BY THE WAY.JEFF.

- HOW ARE YOU?- OH.

- JEFF.HEY.

JEFF.HOW ARE YOU?

- IF ANYONE WILL BE FRIENDSWITH JEFF,

THEY WILL--THEY WILL WIN A POINT.

- I'LL MAKE AN ALLIANCEWITH JEFF.

- GREAT.

- BUT I WILL STAB HIMIN THE BACK.

- THAT'S YOUR PREROGATIVE.EITHER WAY, WE HAD A FRIENDSHIP.

- DOES ANYONE GOFOR A LIGHT LUNCH WITH JEFF?

- CHICKEN SALAD.

- THIS NETWORK WILL GIVE YOU1 MILLION CASH DOLLARS.

A LOT OF NOS.- YEAH, WHAT ABOUT TAXES?

- I'LL PAY 'EM.

LOOK, LET ME JUST SAY,YOU KNOW,

EVEN THOUGHI GOT VOTED OFF FIRST,

I FEEL LIKE I MADE FRIENDSFOR A LIFETIME.

- ♪ YOU AND ME FOREVER - [whistling]

WE GOT A GUEST, A PROSPY,STAYING THE NIGHT.

- I'M MIKEY, BUT ALL MY FRIENDSAT HOME CALL ME LEGS.

- LEGS.

WHAT, ARE YOU ON THE TRACK TEAMOR SOMETHING?

- OH, NO, NO.

CANADA CANCELLED TRACK

AFTER BEN JOHNSON SHAMEDOUR COUNTRY BY CHEATING.

[laughter]

- I GUESS WE'RE NOT USEDTO YOUR CANADIAN COMEDY.

- I GET IT, I GUESS.

[babies crying]

- MACKEREL, TRIPLETS.

THREE TIMES THE BLESSING.

- YEAH,AT THREE TIMES THE COST.

- I ADMIRE YOUR STRENGTH.

I THOUGHT BLIND PEOPLEWORE GLASSES.

- OH.

WELL, MY BLINDNESS WASA PREEXISTING CONDITION,

SO MY INSURANCEDOESN'T COVER IT.

I HAD TO BUY THE CANE MYSELF.

- PEACE OUT.

[school bell rings]

- SO HOW ARE YOU ENJOYINGYOUR TIME HERE SO FAR?

- OH, IT'S QUITE COOL.

IT'S DIFFERENTTHAN OUR CAFETORIUM, THOUGH.

OH, HELLO.

CAN I HAVE A SOFT BOIL WITHTHE BACK BACON ON BROWN BREAD,

A SACK OF KETCHUP CHIPS,AND, UH, A BAG OF HOMO MILK?

- [laughs]HOMO MILK?

- YEAH, 3% HOMOGENIZED MILK.

- SO JUST GET HIMSOME REGULAR MILK, MANNY.

- SORRY.SORRY.

- IT'S ALL RIGHT.MANNY'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU.

- YOU KEEP YOUR MILK IN BAGS?

- YEAH.WELL, HOW WOULD YOU STORE IT?

- WHY DON'T YOU PUT 'EMIN CARTONS?

- BECAUSE WE KEEP IT IN A BAG.

- YOU CAN'T KEEP MILK IN A BAG.

- OH, HEY, TOONS.WHERE'S BECCA?

- OH, SHE COULDN'T MAKE IT.

NURSING FOR THREE TAKES HOURS.

- OH, MY.- MIND IF I JOIN YOU?

- YEAH.- ACTUALLY, THIS TABLE'S FULL.

I'M SURE YOU'LL FIND A GOODPARKING SPOT, TOON-BUGGY.

- TOON-BUGGY?

- YEAH, YOU DODO BIRD.

- HEY, DARREN!

THEY GOT THE BAKED ONES.

- [laughs]

ONE OF THE TRUEWILD MEN OF ROCK.

['80s metal]

SICK STICK SPIT DECREAUX.

- CRACK ATTACK IS BACK, JACK.

- ♪ L.A. DELI

- [laughs]

- YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO I AM.- NO IDEA, FRIEND.

- IT'S NASH RICKEY.

♪ L.A. DELI

- WHOA.I GUESS YOU ARE NASH RICKEY.

[laughs]

- SO SPIT, YOU SELLING STUFFEDANIMALS AT THE BEACH NOW?

- NO, I'M HANGING OUTAT THE BEACH

WITH SOMEOF MY BEST FRIENDS.

PURPLE WHALE,LITTLE DINOSAUR,

LAWRENCE OF A-BABY-A.

- LOOK, SPIT,I DON'T HAVE A LOT OF TIME.

WE'RE GETTINGA ROCK N' REUNION GOING.

I'M GETTIN' ALL OF SLOPPYSECONDZBACK TOGETHER.

I NEED YOU IN.

- OH, I DON'T KNOW, MAN.THAT SHIP HAS SAILED.

- I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GETIN TOUCH WITH YOU.

DIDN'T YOU GET MY LETTER?

- NO, I DON'T HAVE AN ADDRESS.DID YOU EMAIL IT?

- NO, I DON'T USE EMAIL.

SPAM FILTERS,INVALID 404 ERRORS,

NO CONFIRMATION THAT SOMEBODY'SRECEIVED YOUR NOTE.

I LIKE THE PERSONAL TOUCHOF A HANDWRITTEN LETTER.

THE FONT IS YOUR OWN.

NOTHING CAN BEAT A STAMPAND A LETTER.

- THE UNITED STATES POSTALSERVICE IS OBSOLETE,

NASH RICKEY,EVERYBODY KNOWS IT.

- YOU'RE SPEAKING NONSENSE,SPIT.

- THAT'S POSSIBLE.

I FRIED MY BRAINON CRACK COCAINE.

- THOSE DAYS ARE BEHIND US.

SO I GOT TO KNOW, SPIT DECREAUX,ARE YOU IN?

I'LL TAKE THAT AS A YES.

- HA.

- SPIT WAS IN,AND I WAS TWO FOR TWO.

NEXT STOP, SAN DIEGO.