Pussy on the Chainwax

  • Season 3, Ep 13
  • 12/18/2013

Some friends argue over whether a new slang phrase is a "thing," a man learns the truth about his father's Hollywood past, and the valets come to Anne Hathaway's defense.

- I SAW ON THE NEWS TODAY,

TALKING ABOUT THE VIOLENCEIN FOREIGN COUNTRIES.

TALKING ABOUT ALL THE SAVAGERYUP IN THE WORLD,

BUT THEY AIN'T NEVERTALK ABOUT SOUTH CENTRAL.

AIN'T NEVER TALK ABOUTWHAT HAPPENED TO MY BROTHER.

NOW HE'S GONE.

NOW I AIN'T GOT NO BROTHER.

- YO, DOG.

I'LL BE YOUR BROTHER.

- REALLY?

- ABSOLUTELY, DOG.

YOU'RE GONNA NEED SOMEBODYTO LEAN ON.

YOU CAN'T JUST BEWALKING AROUND HERE

WITH THIS EMPTINESSIN YOUR HEART, MAN.

AN EMPTINESS THAT CAN ONLYBE FILLED BY A BROTHER.

- OKAY.

- BROTHERS, MAN?- BROTHERS!

- GET IT IN HERE, DOG.- COME OVER HERE.

- YOU GOT TO GET IT IN THERE,DOG.

- I GOT TO TUCK IT, MAN.[sighs]

- TUCK IT, TUCK IT, TUCK IT.

BROTHERS, MAN.

COME HERE, MAN.

WHY THE [bleep] YOU KEEPFOLLOWING ME AROUND, MAN?

WHY DON'T YOU GO HOMEAND STAY OUT OF MY ROOM?

DON'T MESS WITH MY MODELS.

I'M ABOUT TO GET A WEDGIE UP

IN THIS MOTHER[bleep]RIGHT HERE.

- WHAT THE--HEY!

HEY! GET THE [bleep]OFF ME, MAN.

- GIVE ME THE WEDGIE--HEY.

- HEY.

YOU DON'T GIVE A GROWN MANA WEDGIE.

MOTHER[bleep],I'M 34 YEARS OLD.

I GOT GRANDCHILDREN.

[soul music]

- WHOA.

- MAN, I FELT SORRYFOR THAT DUDE,

BUT, YOU KNOW,WHAT YOU GONNA DO?

I HAD TO LAYTHAT [bleep] DOWN.

[laughter]YOU KNOW I DID, DOG.

- WHAT?THAT [bleep] LAY YOU DOWN.

- HEY, BROTHER, I DON'T KNOWWHAT FIGHT YOU WAS AT.

THAT [bleep] GOTA COUPLE LICKS IN, SURE.

BUT PFFT, I WAS LIKE, BIP!

[laughter]

MAN, I PUT THE PUSSYON THE CHAIN WAX.

[both howling]

PUT THE PUSSY ON THE--both: THE CHAIN WAX.

- I PUT THE PUSSYON THE CHAIN WAX.

all: I PUT THE PUSSYON THE CHAIN WAX.

- PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX?- HMM?

- IS THAT A THING?

- WELL, YEAH. THAT--YEAH.

THAT'S A--THAT'S A THING.

- YEAH.- YEAH, THAT'S SOMETHING.

- OKAY.

- YEAH, I PUT THE PUSSYON THE CHAIN WAX.

- PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX!

- I SAID I PUT THE PUSSYON THE CHAIN WAX!

- HE PUT THE PUSSYON THE CHAIN WAX.

- PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX.- PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX.

- UH, PUSSY COMING IN.

THIS IS THE CHAIN WAX.- HOLD UP.

[laughter]HOLD UP.

I JUST, UM, GOOGLED"PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX."

NO RESULTS.

- MAN, UM,WHY ARE YOU GOOGLING?

- NO, I'M JUST SAYING.

"PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX,"IT'S NOT AN EXPRESSION.

- YE--YEAH IT IS.

- YEAH, IT IS.- YES, THANK YOU.

- IT'S SOMETHING, LEO.- YEAH.

- WHAT IT--WHAT IT--WHAT DOES IT MEAN THEN?

- WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT IT MEANS.- DO IT, DO IT.

- IT MEANS THAT...

IS THAT YOU PUT THE...

all: PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX!

[overlapping chatter]

- NOPE, NOPE.

both: PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX!

- IT'S NOT--DON'T--

- PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX!- PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX.

- ACTING LIKE Y'ALL KNOWWHAT IT IS--

OKAY, HAVE EITHEROF THE TWO OF YOU--

HAVE YOU EVER SAID THE WORDS

"PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX"IN ANY CONTEXT?

- PFFT, US?- PFFT.

HE--HE TALKING TO YOU.- MAN--

- HE AIN'T TALKING TO ME.

- [exhales]- HEY, MAN.

IT'S NOT OUR FAULTTHAT YOU AIN'T NEVER PUT THE...

all: PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX!

[all cheering]- PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX!

- NO ONE CAN PUT THE PUSSYON THE CHAIN WAX

'CAUSE PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAXAIN'T A THING!

YOU TRYING TO START A THING,AREN'T YOU?

- WHA--ME--[laughs]

I MEAN, WHAT ARE YOU TALKINGABOUT, TRYING TO START A THING?

- A THING,LIKE "OFF THE HOOK"

OR "I'MA PUT YOU ON BLAST."

YOU TRYING TO GET ITIN THE ETHER,

SO EVERYBODY OUT THERE SAYING"PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX."

- MAN, WHY ARE YOUDOING THIS?

WHY YOU LOOKING UP[bleep] I'M SAYING AND--

AND FACT-CHECKING MY ASSAND [bleep]?

- YOU KEEP SAYING SOME [bleep]THAT DOESN'T EXIST,

AND YOU GOT THING ONEAND THING TWO

CORROBORATING YOUR STORYLIKE IT DOES,

AND THEN--WHY YOU LYING THEN?

IT'S BULL[bleep]!

- BODIE...

WHY DO YOU CARE SO MUCH

WHETHER I MADE UP"PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX" OR NOT?

I LOST MY JOB.

MY GIRL LEFT ME.

AND ALL I W--ALL I WANTED TO DO

WAS HAVE A LITTLE BIT OF FUNWITH MY FRIENDS TODAY.

SO WHY--WHY DO YOU HA--

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BELITTLE MELIKE THAT?

- [sighs]

IT'S JUST THAT I--- YEAH?

- I'M JUST TRYING TO SAY--

- WHAT YOU TRYING TO SAY,[bleep]?

- I'M TRYING TO SAY

THAT I WANTTO PUT THE PUSSY...

all: ON THE CHAIN WAX!

[laughter]

- HE DID IT, YO.HE PUT THE...

all: PUSSY ON THE CHAIN WAX!- YEAH!