Mudslide Junction

  • Season 1, Ep 4
  • 11/02/2010

The world's smoothest radio DJ struggles with the news, and a vibrator saves the day.

- I'VE GOT YOUR FAVORITE.- Kids: CREEPIOS!

YOU WANNA SEESOMETHING CREEPY?

Kids:SURE, MR. CREEPY.

( guffawing )

WAIT!DON'T FLUSH.

MR. CREEPY, DON'T HANG OUTIN THE TOILET.

BUT I'M THE CREEPIEST.

( laughing )

HELLO, RACHEL.HA HA!

MR. CREEPY, BREAKFAST WASFOUR HOURS AGO.

- BUT I'M STILL CREEPY.- I GUESS.

WAIT.

RACHEL. RACHEL.

YOU GUYS WANT CEREALAS A SNACK?

Kids:YEAH, FRUITY BIRD.

HOW COULD YOUDO THAT TO ME?

- FRUITY FOOO, FRUITY FOOO.- ( kids laughing )

( panicked )FRUITY FOOO, FRUITY FOOO,FRUITY FOOO!

- FRUITY FOOO. FRUITY-- AHH!- ( spine snaps )

OH NO.MR. CREEPY...

- CREEPIOS IS THE BEST.- SHAME ON YOU, MR. CREEPY.

( whispering )I THOUGHT YOU LIKEDMR. CREEPY.

WELL, WE DO, BUT WE LIKEOTHER CEREALS TOO.

DON'T BE SO AGGRESSIVE.THAT'S TOO CREEPY.

I GUESS I'LL JUSTSTOP BEING CREEPY.

I MISS MR. CREEPY.

ME TOO.

COME ON, KIDS.READY TO GO?

- YEAH.- I GUESS SO.

WAIT, GUYS.DON'T FORGET YOUR BOOKS!

( laughing )

Both:MR. CREEPY!

( laughing )

- HEY, I'M BACK.- Kids: YAY!

HEY, DO YOU GUYS WANTSOME MORE CREEPIOS?

Kids:YEAH! YAY!

- YAY. - YAY!

THERE YA GO--BREAKFAST.

YEAH, SO GOOD.

WELL, IT'S, UH--YOU KNOW, IT'S CERTAINLY

AN INTERESTING IDEA,GAY ROBOT,

BUT I DON'T THINKYOU NEED PUBIC HAIR.

I SAW THEM IN A MOVIEAND THEY LOOKED COOL.

( chuckles )

AH, PUBES.

OH, I HAVE A NEW TUTORINGASSIGNMENT FOR YOU.

- HE'S OVER AT ALPHA TAU KAPPA.- ( gasps )

HIS NAMEIS MARTY DONOVAN.

FORIZZEAL?I MET HIM EARLIER.

WE WERE WIZATCHINGFAZOOTBALL.

GAY ROBOT,WHAT DID I TELL YOU

ABOUT ADDING ZsTO WORDS?

I'M SORRY.BLAME SNOOP.HE STARTED IT.

- YEAH, WELL, THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU HAVE TO DO IT, OKAY?- OKAY.

NOW LOOK, MARTY NEEDSHELP IN PHYSICS

AND I THOUGHT YOU'D BEA PERFECT TUTOR FOR HIM.

YEAH, HIS EYES ARE LIKEBROWN DIAMONDS.

EXCUSE ME?

I MEAN, HE SMELLS LIKEA LAVENDER SCROTUM.

JESUS, GAY ROBOT.

LOOK, I TOLD YOU100 TIMES,

PLEASE DON'T FALL IN LOVEWITH MY STUDENTS, OKAY?

I WOULD NEVER DO THAT.

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?I THINK YOU DID.

WHAT ABOUT THE TIMEYOU ASKED BORIS FROMTHE WRESTLING TEAM

IF HE WANTED TO WRESTLEHIS BALLS INTO YOUR MOUTH?

UM, I DON'TREMEMBER THAT.

WELL, I DOAND SO DOES BORIS.

WE CAN CALL HIM IF THAT'SGONNA REFRESH YOUR MEMORY.

- NO. OKAY, ALL RIGHT, I REMEMBER.- I KNOW YOU DO.

LOOK, IT'S JUST I GET LONELYAND I WANT A BOYFRIEND.

I KNOW, GAY ROBOT.I-- I GET LONELY TOOSOMETIMES.

YOU DO?

YEAH. WHY DO YOU THINKI BUILT A ROBOT?

YEAH.PASS THE TISSUES,WE ALL GOT ISSUES.

- ( both laugh )- WELL, BE PATIENT, GAY ROBOT.

YOU'LL MEET A LUCKY FELLOWSOMEDAY, I PROMISE.

AND TALKING ABOUT STUFFI'VE SEEN ON T.V.

ME TOO.

HAVE YOU SEEN"THE AMAZING RACE"?

YEAH, IT'S AWFUL.

I THINKIT'S KIND OF GOOD.

YOU WOULD.YOU'RE AWFUL.

WHOA! WHERE DIDTHAT GUY COME FROM?

OH, HE SMELLS HORRIBLE.

OH, HE CRAPPED HIS PANTS!

AW, THAT IS NASTY.

WHAT YEAR IS THIS?

- 2010.- IT WORKED.

THE TIME MACHINE WORKED.

TIME MACHINE?

WHAT ARE YOU,FROM THE FUTURE?

YES. I'M FROMTHE YEAR 2041.

THE EARTH IS GONNABE DESTROYED,

BUT YOU STILL HAVETIME TO PREVENT IT.

NOW I'M SURE YOU HAVEMANY QUESTIONS FOR ME.

YEAH, DOES EVERYONEIN THE FUTURE CRAPTHEIR PANTS, MAN?

NO.

- SO WE STILL HAVE BATHROOMS?- YEAH, WE DO.

- OH GREAT.- COOL.

UH, ANOTHER QUESTION:SO THE FOOD IN THE FUTURE

IS, LIKE,BABY DIAPER TACOS

FILLED WITH, LIKE,GOAT BALLS OR WHAT?

YOU KNOW WHAT?IT SEEMS LIKE I'VE HAD

AN ACCIDENT TRAVELINGTHROUGH TIME,

SO I COULD WARN YOUABOUT THE END OF THE WORLD.

NEXT TIME YOU SHOULDWEAR A DIAPER.

OKAY, I THINKTHIS IS A SIDE EFFECTFROM TIME TRAVEL, OKAY?

CAN WE JUST PLEASETRY TO GET PAST THE FACTTHAT I CRAPPED MYSELF?

- I'LL TRY, BUT YOU REALLY SMELL.- UH, YEAH RIGHT.

LIKE YOU DIDN'T DO THATAT THE HOLIDAY PARTY.

THIS GUY-- BOOZYIN THE MUDSLIDE JUNCTION.

( blows raspberry )JUST A MUD WATERFALL.

- YOU DID, MAN.- I WAS DRUNK, NICK.

I WAS DRUNK.YOU'RE NOT DRUNK.

- RIGHT?- NO, I'M NOT.

- HE'S SOBER.- SO WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE, GOOKY GUY?

ALL RIGHT, WILL BOTHOF YOU SHUT UP

SO I CAN EXPLAIN TO YOUHOW TO SAVE THE PLANET?

HEY, MAN,DON'T BE RUDE.

YOU LANDED IN OUROFFICE FROM THE FUTUREWITH YOUR PANTS SOILED

AND YOU RUINEDTHAT'S-WHAT-SHE-SAIDTHURSDAYS.

LOOK, I'M SORRYI YELLED, OKAY?

BUT CAN WE PLEASEGET PAST THE FACTTHAT I CRAPPED MYSELF?

ALL RIGHT, FINE.WE'LL GET PAST IT.

HOW DO YOU SAVETHE EARTH, FUTURE GUY?

OKAY, GREAT.THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT.

NOW CONTACT THE LEADERSOF THE FREE WORLD--

- "DON'T -- YOUR PANTS."- ( zaps )

UH! OH...

OH GREAT,ANOTHER DOO-DOO BOY.

- WHAT YEAR IS IT?- 2010, STINKY.

WHAT ARE YOUTALKING ABOUT?

HEY, WAIT.( sniffs )

THIS GUY DIDN'TCRAP HIS PANTS.

- IT'S FRESH.- HEY.

HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THAT, DOO-DOO BOY?

THEY MUST HAVEMADE ADJUSTMENTS TOTHE NEW TIME MACHINES.

YEAH, THEY DID.THEY TOOK THE, UH,

DON'T-CRAP-YOUR-PANTS SWITCHAND THEY FLIPPED IT ON.

DO NOT DO IT.

HE BURNED YOU,DOO-DOO BOY.

HEY, QUIT CALLING MEDOO-DOO BOY

OR I'M NOT GONNA TELL YOUHOW TO SAVE THE PLANET.

UH, WE DON'TNEED YOU ANYMORE.

WE HAVE ANOTHERFRESH FUTURE GUY

THAT DOESN'T REEKOF THE POOPIES.

( guys laugh )

I DON'T KNOW ANYTHINGABOUT SAVING THE PLANET.

I JUST CAME BACK TO BETON SPORTING EVENTS.

WE SHOULD HAVE NEVERGONE OFF THE TRAIL.

( howling )

- WE'RE GONNA DIE OUT HERE.- NO, WE'RE GONNA BE OKAY.

- I BROUGHT THIS.- A VIBRATOR?

- THIS IS TURNING YOU ON?- IT'S NOT JUST A VIBRATOR.

IT'S A SURVIBRATOR.

Announcer: SURVIBRATOR, THE WORLD'S

MOST COMPLETE SURVIVAL VIBRATOR.

IF YOU GET LOST IN THE WOODS,

YOU'LL HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED.

IT'S A NAIL FILE,

A SUNDIAL,

A GIANT BLACK FLASHLIGHT,

A FISHING POLE.

IT'S EVEN A TOOTHBRUSH.

AND PERHAPS MOST IMPORTANTLY, THE SURVIBRATOR CAN BE USED

- TO FIGHT OFF DANGEROUS ANIMALS.- ( howling )

THAT ALL SOUNDS GREAT,BUT CAN IT STOP ANTS

FROM CRAWLING IN MY ASSWHILE I'M ASLEEP?

Announcer: YES, IT CAN.

( Survibrator buzzing )

SURVIBRATOR! DON'T FORGET MOTHER'S DAY.