Veterans endure long wait times at VA hospitals, and Larry discusses a decline of conservative speakers at colleges with Arianna Huffington, Ricky Velez and Franchesca Ramsey.
Yeah! Thank you very much.
Man, what a great crowd.
AUDIENCE (chanting):Larry! Larry! Larry! Larry!
Welcome to The Nightly Show.
I'm Larry Wilmore.Thank you so much, guys.
Arianna Huffingtonon the show tonight.
-Very excited about that.-(cheering, applause)
Uh, before we start, though,uh, I have to show you guys
something. I was watching CNNlast night at 1:30 a.m.
Because on Tuesdays I liketo punish myself for my sins.
It's-it's... just what I do.
Catholics, Catholics, Catholics.Couple of Jews. Very good. Okay.
Now... now...And I'm not making this up.
While they talked aboutprotests at a Trump rally--
absolutely true-- this happened.
A tweet that Donald Trumpjust put out--
"Great rally in New Mexico, amazing crowd!
"Now in L.A. Big rally in Anaheim."
No mention of the protests.
Okay, you probablydidn't see it,
so let's look at it again.
And this time let's focuson the reply tweet.
REPORTER: "Great rally in new Mexico, amazing crowd!
Now in L.A. Big rally in Anaheim."
Okay. Okay. All right.
For our home audience, okay?
I know the wordis blurred for you guys,
so let me just tell you, um...
but it rhymes with "lock".
Um... it starts with a C.
Um, and it's (bleep), okay?
So the word... the wordis (bleep), is what it is.
-(cheering, applause)-No, stop. Such a bad crowd.
That's right,CNN showed a reply tweet
from @Parker9_ that said
"Does your (bleep)match your skin color?
Like, is it orange?"
I don't know.
Guys, mmm, mmm, mmm.
It's an historic momentin that it's--
this is true--this is the first time
that CNN has ever featureda follow-up question.
Unbelievable, you guys.
The Nightly Show salutes you,@Parker9_. Well done.
-Well done.-(cheering, applause)
Well done. That's a question.
That is a follow-up question,my friends.
Okay. Oh, very excitedabout this.
Now it's timefor a new segment on the show,
Larry Does Lines.Wait...
No, no, no, no, guys.
Really, graphics department?
I don't do cocaine, you guys.
Yes, I roll up my $100 bills,but that's just 'cause
it's easier to carry.That's it. Okay. Mm-mmm.
No, the reasonwhy we have that is because
we're talking aboutthese massive airport lines.
Complaints about long security lines at airports
have increased more thantenfold over the last year.
The TSA blames those delays on an increase in travelers
and a shortage of screeners.
REPORTER: This headline dubbed the trip through security
"a slow march through hell".
Wow. Slow march through hell.
And if you're flying Spirit,
you got a long flightthrough hell.
Guys... That's a lot of hell.
That's a lot of hell.
Anyway, Congressis looking into the problem
and has already firedone top TSA official.
REPORTER: The TSA's been under fire for giving
its now-former intelligence chief a $90,000 bonus
despite ongoing problems with airport security
and long, frustrating wait times
at airport security checkpoints.
Okay, guys, I know $90,000seems like a lot, right?
But in his defense,he did come up with the idea
of touching people's junk.
That was his idea.No, it's true.
Before that they just passedthe wand over your junk, right?
And he said, hey, man...touch the junk.
Do it in front of the kids.
Let's go total humiliation here.
That's my contribution.
$90,000, bitches.Right here.
I don't... I don't understandwhy this is all happening.
What... All people have to dois walk through metal detectors.
How hard can that be?
Can we see who'sholding up the line?
There's the problem. Sorry.
I almost forgot about thatallegedly blind alleged rapist.
I almost forgot.
Will somebody lock that guy up
so we can get throughthese lines, please?
All right, but amidstthe growing frustrations,
airports are tryingto make it up to passengers
in delightfully idiotic ways.
REPORTER: In Denver they're planning to sweeten up
passengers, offering them candy in line.
Seattle and Atlanta-- musical performances with snacks.
And in San Diego they're bringing in the clowns.
Good lord, there's alreadytons of anxiety at the airport.
The last thing you want is a guy
who didn't have the wherewithalto avoid being a clown.
A clown's whole lifeis a slow march through hell.
That's all I'm saying.
Jesus Ch... What's next,a petting zoo?
REPORTER: In Cincinnati they've enlisted the help
of therapy ponies to bring down the tension.
REPORTER 2: Aw.
Come on, distracting crowds withpink and white therapy ponies
is condescendingto our human intelligence.
And it's doubly condescendingto my psychiatrist,
who's an actual therapy pony.
Dr. Heynibblehas gotten me through
some very tough times, you guys.
All right. Here with moreon this frustrating situation
is TSA agent Ron Thursday.
-Thanks, Larry.-Hey, Ron. How's it going?
Hey, listen, you cancall me Producer Ron.
Producer?W-Why would I call you that?
'Cause a brother'smultitalented, man.
I'm a TSA agent-slash-producer, baby.
Producer? What are you
-talking about?-I'm a show producer, yes.
Look, I'll show you right now.Enter Prince look-alike
in three, two, one, bam!
What the hell was that?
That was Prince, baby.(laughs)
Are you not entertained?
I am not entertained, correct.
-(scoffs) -But what... look,what about these long lines?
All these people are doing...
They're all tryingto catch flights.
Look, these people ain't herefor no flights, Larry.
They're here for the show.Come on, am I right?
How many of y'all are herefor a flight? How many...
Man, y'all ain't here forno flight. Come on in, Giggles.
Watch this, watch this.Watch this, Larry.
Watch this. Hey,make me an elephant, Giggles.
-An elephant? -No, you knowwhat, that's too complicated.
Just make me a snake.
Do I have an all-star lineupor what, Larry?
Do I not havean all-star lineup, Larry?
-He didn't even do anything!-Aw, come on.
-That wasn't even a good snake,for Christ's sakes. -Hater.
All right, but, Producer Ron,there are people in line
for hours. I mean, you haveto do something about that
other than just entertain them.
Look, Larry, Larry, look,the truth is
we can't do (bleep)about these lines, man.
-We can't do a damn thing. Okay?-Really?
We only get four weeksof TSA training, Larry.
Okay? Do you knowhow long terrorists train?
-We don't stand a chance, man!-Mmm.
-That's true. -So wejust keep 'em entertained, baby!
-(laughs)-Okay. All right. I understand.
-Yes. (speaks indistinctly)-I understand.
Okay. But...but shouldn't the TSA
be focused on securityand not putting on a show?
Look, Larry, look, the wholeidea of security at airports
is a show, okay?Look, last year, during tests,
we missed knives and bombs95% of the time!
-Oh, my God.-Dude, we are horrible at this!
Okay?So this is all just for show.
Speaking of show,make it rain a purple rain.
-I got you, boo.-Thanks, Gerald.
-Gerald is horrible!It's the worst -Oh, please.
-Prince impersonator ever.-Gerald's awesome.
This is insane. How...
Look, how is this ever goingto get better? Please.
With bits like this.Come on in, Giggles.
-Come on. This guy's hilarious,Larry. -No, I don't...
-No, I'm tired of the clown.-He's hilarious.
Look, he's doing a clown...
Look, look, look,the "clown with the rifle" bit.
-Come on, man!-That doesn't even make sense!
-What if he's a terrorist?-Oh, pl... please, Larry,
where did you ever seea terrorist that funny?
Okay, remember, people,no liquids on the line.
No liquids unless you just peedin your pants
from this hilarious comedy show!
(laughs) Ron Thursday'sthe new Tyler Perry, baby!
-Okay. Not really.-(laughs)
-What? (grunting) -Producer RonThursday/Tyler Perry, everybody!
-We'll be right back!-Whenever you need me, Larry!
Thank you! Welcome back!
Okay. All right.
Let's continue the themeof Larry Does Lines.
Guys, no,it's still not about cocaine.
You had the entire commercialto fix that, all right?
We're talkingabout the inexcusable lines
our nation's veterans faceto get health care.
Veteran Affairs Secretary RobertMcDonald continuing to catch
a lot of flak for his commentsmade yesterday.
How does the veteran feel abouttheir encounter with the V.A.?
When you go to Disney, dothey measure the number of hours
you wait in line or the num...You know, what's important?
What's importantis what's your satisfaction
with the experience.
Why are you comparingwhat a government agency does
to what Disney does? I mean,that's like the IRS saying,
"Sure, we havea complicated system
"but what about Dorathe Explorer?
I mean, her accountingis all over the place."
It just doesn't make sense.
Uh, look, now,Secretary McDonald's
Disney comparison statementis bad enough,
but I also love this Fox News'anchor's reaction.
First of all, Disney doesmeasure your-your satisfaction
on how you wait in lines.They've come up with Fastpasses,
other ways to amuse the kids.
Yeah, Disney's the onethat needs defending here,
not the troops. Right.
Look, the point isis that V.A. waiting times suck.
And comparing them toDisney's lines insults veterans,
Though perhapsit does insult Disney veterans.
Thank you, Mulan, for yourservice in defeating the Huns.
(cheering and applause)
And then there's this.
There's a new GAO reportwhich indicates
that there are still very longwait times,
that, of 180 peoplewho had been surveyed,
uh, 60, only 60had gotten-gotten in
for primary care.
Geez, only a thirdare getting care?
Look, if nothing else,by comparing the V.A. to Disney,
Robert McDonald's statementshows that getting vets
timely health careis the real fantasy.
And what gets me about this,that veterans wait, like,
forever to get careafter fighting these wars
but there's no wait at allwhen they sign up
to go fight in the war. Right?
All right, for more...
-(cheering and applause)-Appreciate it.
For more insight on this matter,we thought
it would be interesting to talkto two Nightly Show staffers
who are also Army veterans.So please welcome
Sergeant Jonathan Ginter andMaster Sergeant Benari Poulten
-to the show.-(cheering and applause)
Now, Jonathan, uh... Very good.
Jonathan, you served two toursin Afghanistan.
Benari, you served, like, threestours... uh, three tours,
one in Iraq, Afghanistan,and Guantanamo, right?
Okay, so first of all,thank you for your service.
-Thank you. -Thank you.-Um... -(cheering and applause)
So I want to know what's been...what's been your experience
with gettinghealth care benefits
after coming back from, uh...from war?
From my experience, I would...I would say if you're going
into the V.A., remember,the tables are now turned
-and you're in charge.You don't have to take -Right.
the doctor they-they give you.
Um, if you don't likethe person's attitude,
you can just say,"Give me a different doctor."
And keep doing ituntil they give you somebody,
-um, who's actually addressingwhat you need. -Yeah.
-And... -And you can use that"I was just in Afghanistan,
-mother(bleep)er" face, right?Right? -Yeah. Right? Yeah.
-Absolutely. Yeah. -But also,you know, we're-we're also part
-of a community. And thereare a lot of people, -Sure.
there are good people inthe V.A. who want to help you.
But there's also a lotof good organizations, IAVA,
there are veterans organizationsthat are out there
-who-who can help you navigatethis system. -Right. Yeah.
-Right. -So it's...You know, when you c...
when you're in the military,you have a "suck it up
-and drive on" attitude.-Mm-hmm. Yes.
-Um, so, you know, that doesn'thelp... -That doesn't help.
That doesn't helpin this situation. Right.
So don't be afraid to ask othersfor help to help you navigate
-the system. -That's very good.Okay, so we kind of made fun
of the fact that the guycompared this to Disney.
But on a lighter note,
do you have any fun storiesabout Disney?
-(laughter) -Yeah. I've, uh...I've never been to Disney.
Oh, see, I...When I was in high school
years ago my family--my family-- we did a...
-Do you have a story?-Yeah, I do.
-(laughter)We took a... we took a trip
to Disney World,and we got the VIP--
-the Cavuto fast pass thathe loves so much. -Yes. Right.
We got to cut the linesand do all the secret passages,
and we went to, like,the Bear Jamboree,
and they took usthrough the back room
where the break room was.
And I've seen a lot of (bleep)in the military.
-Oh, my God! Yes! -But nothingwill ever be as disturbing
as, like, Goofy and Minniewith their heads off smoking
-cigarettes. -(laughter)-Yes! Very good.
-That'd give you some visual.-(applause and cheering)
Now we want to thankour Nightly Show staffers
and proud veterans,Sergeant Jonathan Ginter
and Master SergeantBenari Poulten, everybody.
-We'll be right back.-(applause and cheering)
Thank youfor your service, guys.
Okay, welcome back.I'm here with my panel.
First up-- Nightly Show contributor Ricky Velez.
-(applause and cheering)-Hey.
And Nightly Show contributor Franchesca Ramsey.
(applause and cheering)
And her new book,
The Sleep Revolution: Transforming Your Life,
One Night at a Time, is out now.
And she's the co-founder,of course,
and editor-in-chiefof The Huffington Post--
-Arianna Huffington.-(applause and cheering)
Yeah! And for everyone at home,
join our conversation right nowon Twitter @NightlyShow
using the hashtag "Tonightly."
Okay, so graduation seasonis upon us.
And recently, President Obama,
in his commencement speechat Rutgers--
he gave the graduatesa little bit of flack
for disinviting Condoleezza Ricea couple of years ago,
saying dropping herwas misguided.
(as Obama): "I don't thinkthat's how democracy works best,
when we're not even willingto listen each other."
Then he, like,paused for an hour,
and then he finished his speech,right?
But this also speaksto a larger trend.
Apparently,over the past 15 years or so,
the number of largelyconservative speakers being
disinvited to collegeshas risen dramatically.
-(laughter)-Oh, my God.
Look at that number! Okay.
What the hell's going onon colleges?
-Anybody have any idea?-It's rude, man! That's rude!
-It's rude?-Actually, I think that...
You ever been disinvitedto a party?
-That (bleep) will hurtyour feelings. -(laughter)
-I feel out of the zeitgeist.-WILMORE: Mm-hmm.
I gave two commencementaddresses this year,
and I have one more to go,
and I haven't been disinvitedfrom any, but... -Yeah.
-(applause and cheering)-There's still time, right.
But I still wanted to...
First of all, I don't agreewith disinviting guest speakers.
-WILMORE: Sure.-But I think...
Well, because it's cold-blooded.You invite them,
and then,they get disinvited, right.
Yeah, but my point is
-that I think what has happened,since the Iraq war... -Mm-hmm.
...has made everybody feel
-that this was sucha dreadful decision... -Yeah.
...that this was the worst,
-most tragic foreign policydecision ever... -Sure.
...in our lifetime and before.
-Mm-hmm. -And so, the people whowere part of that decision...
I mean George W. Bush wasdisinvited seven times, which...
-(laughter and groaning)-Yes. It's true.
An ex-president.In fact, we have a...
Can we show that? I know we weregonna maybe show with another...
Yes. Okay, here are someof the people.
George W. Bush-- seven times!
An ex-president,for goodness sakes.
Ann Coulter, I understand, yeah.
But John McCain?John McCain's a war hero!
-VELEZ: This is... this is...-RAMSEY: I honestly want to know
who is paying Ann Coulterto speak anywhere?
(laughter and groaning)
-Other than Fox News.-(applause and cheering)
-WILMORE: Right. -VELEZ:No, but this is a bubble.
-This is a bubble. This is abubble. -WILMORE: It's a bubble?
-Oh, college is.-College has become a bubble.
A lot of these schools-- there'sGeorgetown, Boston College.
-Mm-hmm. -This isn't happeningat Nassau Community College.
-But it's not! It's not!-John McCain was disinvited
-at Nassau Community College,you think? -Yeah. -(laughter)
Yes, they would be so hyped.
The point hereis that they were invited.
-WILMORE: Yes.-If they were not invited,
-of course, there's no issue,and if I was in charge, -Sure.
they would neverhave been invited.
-But... but... but they were.-(laughter) -Yes.
It's clear, Arianna,if you were running a college,
it's clear, it's clearwho's gonna get invited.
Larry, you wouldhave gotten invited.
-Yeah.-I hope you would have accepted.
-Oh, of course.-But my point is that
it actually... createssomething incredibly dangerous.
Because that's the excusethat tyrants use.
-Sure.-"I find your speech offensive.
-Shut it down. -I'm goingto torture you and kill you."
There's a differencebetween torturing someone
and just saying, like,"I don't really want to hear
what you have to say."Like, I just don't...
-They're not the same.-You have that right,
to not invite them,but we're talking
about once they've been invited.
Nobody here is saying youdon't have the right to invite.
Okay, and there aredifferent ways to protest.
This happened at, I thinkit was at DePaul University.
Some, uh,activist hijacked an event
by the college Republicans,I think it was.
There was the guy-- what'shis name? Milo Yiannopoulos?
HUFFINGTON: Milo Yiannopoulos.Yeah, I can tell you.
-It's a Greek name.-Yeah. Well... Yeah. -(laughter)
Uh... very good, Arianna,very good.
-(laughter, applause)-I don't know how you got that.
I thought... I thoughtthat's why I was invited. I...
I appreciate you helpinga brother out like that.
If you need any helpon any Deshauns
-or that kind of stuff...-(laughter)
just let me know.
Let me know.I'm there for you.
-(whooping, applause)-Uh, okay, but what happened...
what happened here was that, uh,
so, the activistactually came up on the stage
and stopped the eventfrom happening.
See, I thinkthat's going too far.
I think booing is fine,you know.
I hate this ideathat when people...
critique someone's speech,someone says,
"Oh, my free speechis being impeded!"
It's, like, no, you havethe freedom to say something
-and people have the freedom...-Of course.
-I'm not saying aboutcritiquing. -Oh, absolutely.
Nobody's sayingyou can't critique.
Again, I don't thinkthat it's right
-that they took the mike awayfrom him, -WILMORE: Right.
but I do see lots of peoplesaying bigoted things
and just being like,"Just my opinion! Free speech!"
And it's, like, okay,I have the free speech
to tell you that you're a bigotand I don't like what you had
-to say. -Right. Sure. Ricky,you were gonna say something?
The definition of a liberalright now,
it has changed, I think.
Are you talking abouton college campuses, or...?
On college campuses everywhere,it's just...
being liberal was,uh, being understanding,
willing to listento other people's opinions
and the rest of that,and that's gone.
And now that that's gone,
it makes a collegea dangerous place,
because you're only gonna learnwhat's in that lane,
and that's not good, ever.
-I think if your opinion...-(applause)
I mean, I-I think if your...I think if your opinion upholds
the mistreatmentof someone else,
then you absolutely havethe right to critique it,
but I also hate this idea
that this is justput upon college students,
as if college students are,like, these big babies.
I dare you to tell a baby boomer
that the Beatles are overrated,
-(laughter)-and they will freak... out.
-I'm about to freak out rightnow. -And they will freak out!
-I'm just saying... -The Beatlesare not overrated, young lady!
-(laughter)-But that's what I'm saying.
Not... Now I got a flyattacking me!
They are so quick to say
-that it's college students.-'Cause it's true!
-Now these are fightin' words!-Exactly!
All right, Arianna,bring us home, bring us home.
So, I think weare mixing up two things.
-Yeah. -Nobody here is sayingwe cannot critique.
-Mm-hmm. -What we are saying is,do we have the right
to censor someoneby disinviting them
or by taking the microphoneaway from them,
-and I say absolutely yesto the first, -Yeah.
-no, to the second.-Can't we just live
in one large obelisk together?
-Yeah. Exactly, and...-That's what I say.
All right, we'll be right back.
YARD: If you live in New York City or are planning to visit,
grab tickets to The Nightly Show.