Wednesday, November 6, 2013

  • 11/06/2013

Jason Sklar, Randy Sklar and Ron Funches mourn the loss of Blockbuster and reveal items that they would give away for free on Craigslist.

ITS TIME FOR TONIGHT'S HASHTAGHASHTAG WARS.

I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU A HASHTAGAND 60 SECRETARY SECONDS ON THE

CLOCK AND YOU WILL BUZZ IN WITHAS MANY TWEETS CAUSE AND 100

POINTS FOR EACH CORRECT EXAMPLE.

AS AN IN MEMORIAL TRIBUTE TOBLOCKBUSTER VIDEO, GUYS, THE

HASHTAG IS FAILED BUSINESSES.

EXAMPLES OF FAILED BUSINESSESMIGHT BE, BROWN JULIUS.

OR RELAX THE FRONT.

SO THOSE OF YOU GUYS CAN PLAY ATHOME ALONG WITH @MIDNIGHT.

JASON.

>> JAWMA JEWS.

>> COULD I HAVE A LITTLE PROTEININ THERE?

>> YES, YOU CAN.

>> RANDY.

>> FOREVER 61.

>> YES, FOREVER 61.

WELL PLAYED.

RON FUNCHES.

>> 50 PEW.

>> IS IT BAD THAT I WANT THAT?

>> PAULA DEEN'S CRACKENER ABARREL.

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE ).

>> I CAN SEE THAT.

JASON.

>> BED, BATH, AND BENEATH.

>> YEAH, OKAY.

NO?

THE CROWD WASN'T WITH YOU ONTHAT ONE.

NO POINTS, NO POINTS.

NEXT ONE.

RANDY.

>> SIZZLER.

THAT WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA,TERRIBLE IDEA.

>> POINTS, POINT.

JASON.

>> JERRY SANDUSKY'S DISCOVERYZONE.

YOU GET POINTS.

RON FUNCHES.

>> THONGS FOR SENIORS.

>> WHICH YOU CAN GET AT FOREVER61.

POINTS!

WELL DONE, GUYS.

>> GUYS, IT IS TIMETO PLAY "ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )OKAY.

THE WORST ROOM IS A TUMBLR THATCHRONICLES THE PERILS OF FINDING

A BIG CITY APARTMENT HAVE ACRAIGSLIST.

I SAID AFFORDABLE, NOT NIERKSLIVABLE.

I WILL SHOW YOU A PHOTO OF ANAPARTMENT AND YOU NEED TO COME

UP WITH A BETTER TAG LINE TOSELL THIS APARTMENT TO SOMEONE

THAN THE ONE THAT'S ON THADE.

HERE'S THE FIRST ONE.

SHARED BASEMENT, SHAREDBASEMENT.

WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED THAN THIS?

A DIVIDER AND A TENT AND ATELEVISION.

RON FUNCHES.

>> ARE YOU A RUGGED INDOORSMAN?

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE ).

>> I LOVE IT.

I LOVE IT.

>> I THINK YOU WOULD HAVE TO BERUGGED FOR WHATEVER THAT LIVING

SITUATION IS.

>> LOOK AT HOW SAD THE OCCUPYMOVEMENT HAS BECOME.

>> IT'S GONE AROUND-->> NEXT ONE, NEXT ONE, 750 A

MONTH.

IT'S A PLATFORM IN SOME TYPE OFA FREIGHT GARAGE.

LONG-TERM ONLY!

RON FUNCHES.

>> WHY HAVE AN APARTMENT WHENYOU CAN HAVE A DUPLEX?

>> OH, YOU ARE GOOD!

( APPLAUSE )YOU SHOULD GO INTO REAL ESTATE,

MY FRIEND.

>> I DON'T KNOW WHY, I JUST HADTO READ THIS IN SOME KIND OF

WEIRD ACCENT-- LONG-TERM, ONLY!

>> CAN I HAVE IT FOR SHORT TERM.

>> NO, NO, LONG TERM ONLY.

YOU LIVE ON PLATFORM FOREVER!

I BURY YOU YOU ON THE PLATFORM!

( APPLAUSE )HERE'S THE NEXT ONE FOR 675 A

MONTH.

BRING LADDER.

B.Y.O.L., GUYS.

B.Y.O.L.

HERE'S THE-- LET'S JUST SAYTHAT'S A MANNEQUIN.

LET'S JUST SAY THAT'S A HALF AMANNEQUIN.

RANDY?

>> MY QUESTION WAS DOES TEDWILLIAMS' FROZEN TORSO ALSO COME

WITH IT.

>> THAT'S ON THE OTHER LEVEL.

THAT'S WHY YOU NEED THE LADDER.

>> THE OTHER TITLE WOULD BEEAT-IN BATHROOM AND HAUNTED

BIDET.

>> POINTS, POINTS!

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>> I LIKE IT.

>> ALL RIGHT.

OKAY, HERE'S THE NEXT ONE, FOR750 A MONTH, WALLS WILL BE

REPAINTED WHITE BEFORE YOU MOVEIN.

NO WINDOWS.

NO WINDOWS.

RON FUNCHES.

>> 420 FRIENDLY.

BUT ACID REQUIRED.

>> POINTS!

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'D WANT TO

PAINT OVER THAT.

YOU COULD TOTALLY-- IF YOU'RETRYING TO FIND THE ZODIAC

KILLER-->> IT'S ALL RIGHT THERE.

>> IT'S ALL RIGHT THERE.

>> COME LIVE WHERE KEITH HERRINGDIED.

>> IT'S RIGHT THERE.

>> IT'S RIGHT THERE.

IT'S ALL RIGHT THERE.

>>JOSE CANSECO.

HUGS OR HATES?

JOSE CANSECO AS MANY OF YOU KNOWIS A RETIRED MAJOR LEAGUE

BASEBALL PLAYER WHO HAS ANOPINION ABOUT PRETTY MUCH

ANYTHING ON TWITTER.

IF YOU'RE NOT FOLLOWING HIM, YOUARE MISSING OUT.

FOR 250 POINTS, I'M GOING TONAME A PERSON OR TOPIC AND

YOU'RE GOING TO SAY WHETHER JOSEGIVES IT LOVE, WHICH YOU SAY

HUGS, OR HE DOES NOT LIKE IT,YOU SAY HATE.

AL GORE, HUGS OR HATES?

>> I'M GOING TO SAY HATE.

>> LET'S FIND OUT.

I THINK IT'S ACTUALLY HUGS.

HUGS.

AL GORE WAS HAEFD HIS TIME.

I MISS HIM.

REST IN PEACE, BUDDY.

HUGS FOR YOU.

IN THIS CASE-->> IS HE DEAD?

>> IN THIS CASE, SOMETIMESJOSE'S BRAIN FIRES, AND HE

DOESN'T KNOW-- SO HE WASCONVINCED THAT GORE WAS DEAD.

BUT THERE WAS A FOLLOW-UP TWEET.

"SORRY AL, YOU NEED TO MAKE SOMEMORE NOISE, BRO.

KEEP FIGHTING FOR US."

>> IT'S A WAKE-UP CALL FOR ALGORE.

>> IF SOMEONE DOESN'T TWEET FORA DAY THEY'RE DEAD FOR ME.

THAT'S JOSE CANSECO.

>> IN BASEBALL HE CALLED THATCHIN MUSIC.

YOU GOTTA WAKE UP OFF-- I GETALL MY NEWS FROM JOSE CANSECO.

>> ALL OF IT.

ALL RIGHT, NEXT ONE, GLOBALWARMING.

HUGS OR HATES?

RON FUNCHES?

>> I'M GOING TO SAY HE HAS LOVEFOR IT.

HUGS.

>> ARE YOU RIGHT!

HE LOVES GLOBAL WARMING.

HERE WE GO.

"TITANIC," 100 YEARS, WOW.

GLOBAL WARMING COULD HAVE SAVED"TITANIC."

SAD TO SAY.

COULD HAVE SAVED IT.

>> WOULD HAVE MADE IT A BETTERMOVIE, TOO.

>> SERIOUSLY.

>> A BEACH BALL POPPING OUTTHERE.

>> NEXT ONE, NEXT ONE, A-ROD,HOW DOES FEEFL ABOUT A-ROD?

RANDY.

>> HE HATES A-ROD.

>> HAPPY BIRTHDAY BITCH TIT.

BEFORE THE BREAK, I SHOWED OURCOMEDIANS THIS SCREEN GRAB FROM

THE FRONT PAGE OF FOX NEWS' WEBSITE YESTERDAY WHICH HAD THIS

PLACE HOLDER WEEEEE.

AND THE STORY TITLE IN THE BODYOF THE ARTICLE WAS STUFF, " WHY

O.

>> THAT'S SO FOX NEWS, RIGHT.

MORE FOX THAN FRIENDS.

VERY FOX NEWS.

>> YOU GUYS WRITE THE FIRST LINEOF THE NEWS STORY THAT STARTS

WITH WEEEEE!

STUFF, " WHY O.

WHAT DID YOU COME UP WITH, RANDYSKLAR.

>> I CALM UP WITH OBAMA FORCESBABY TO DRIVE A CAR.

>> IT IS FOX NEWS.

IT IS FOX NEWS.

>> YOU KNOW THEY'RE TRYING TOGET IN THERE.

>> THE BABY DIDN'T WANT TO ANDOBAMA IS LIKE, "YES YOU CAN."

JASON?

>> I DID PUBLICITY STUNT FOR BADGRANDPA GOES HORRIBLY WRONG,

" WHY O.

YO.

>> RON FUNCHES.

>> I HAD YOUNG NEW MEXICAN MAN'SFIRST WORDS AFTER ESCAPING

NEO-NAZI.

>> WELL DONE!

THIS IS CRAIGSLIST FREE ITEMS.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )IF YOU CAN'T SELL YOUR STUFF ON

E-BAY, GO TO CRAIGSLIST.

THEY'LL TAKE IT OFF.

IF YOU CAN'T SELL IT ONCRAIGSLIST, YOU HAVE TO GIVE IT

AWAY FOR FREE ON CRAIGSLIST.

BASICALLY THESE ITEMS ARE REALLY( BLEEP ).

I WANT YOU TO NAME AS MANY FREEITEMS AS YOU WOULD GIVE AWAY ON

CRAIK, AS MANY WEIRD FREE ITEMSYOU CAN THINK OF AND FOR EACH

FUNNY ONE YOU GET 250 POINTS.

60 SECONDS ON THE CLOCK.

JASON.

>> CHINESE BABY GIRL.

CHINA ONLY.

>> YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOU KNOW WHAT?

IF YOU'RE OFFENDED, IT'S YOURFAULT.

YOU LAUGHED.

POINTS!

THEY MADE THAT FOR YOU.

RANDY.

>> RIP TAILOR'S TAX RETURNS--SHREDDED, OF COURSE.

>> POINTS!

RON FUNCHES.

>> WHITE POWER AFRO PICK.

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE ).

>> YEAH!

BECAUSE NO ONE EVER IMAGINESWHAT THE WHITE FOLKS ARE GOING

TO DO WITH THEIR AFRO PICKS.

>> SIEWNS BOYLE'S DIAPHRAGM.

IT'S BARELY BEEN USED.

BARELY BEEN USED.

>> POINTS!

YES, RON FUNCHES.

>> COMPLETE SET OF BEANIE BABIESTHAT TURNED AGAINST ME.

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE )

>> POINTS!

YES, RANDY.

>> A HAND JOB FROM A LABRADOODLEWITH VERY SOFT PAWS.

( BUZZER ).

>> POINTS FOR YOU, RANDY SKLAR.

Loading...