Kif does everything possible to win Amy's parents' approval.
Host man, host woman,
I'm having a wonderful time.
You here five hours,and already you tear up couch,
draw mustacheon priceless painting,
and fill poolwith brine shrimp.
Not bad for a city boy, huh?
Uh, by the way, Itook the liberty
of fertilizingyour caviar.
( gulping )
( guzzling )
( burps )
I'm sure my parentswill love you.
You don't understand.
When I get nervous,I can't control mycamouflage reflex.
Oh, dear!Oh, goodness!
Oh, odds and bodkins.
I'll have a thoraxand some feelers.
You want some salad with that?
Mom, Dad, youremember Kif.
This your boyfriend?
I have instant dislike of him.
He too scrawny to fathergrandchildren.
He's not scrawny.
He's just small-boned.
Actually, I don't have bones.
I'm supported by a systemof fluid-filled bladders that...
Yes, yes. You'rea big, squishy wuss.
Amy should be datingreal man... like him.
I can be manly, too.
I think I'll, uh,light up a smoke.
( whispers ):Wrong way.
( inhales )
( gasping )
Look on the bright side.
My parents left afteryou passed out,
so they didn't evensee you barf.
Oh, now they'll never thinkI'm manly enough
to date their daughter.
( sobbing )
It's okay, Kif.
I'll go getyou a tissuefrom your tote.
Hey, there, Amy.
Like you to meetmy buddy, Joe.
Sorry I'm late.
My pool game ran longat the jazz club.
( chuckles )
Kids love him.
And even though the computerwas off and unplugged
an image stayed on the screen.
the Windows logo!
Pss! That's not scary.
It is if you're a laser printer.
Okay, my turnto tell a ghost story.
Once, there wasthis woman driving...
Hook in the hand.
Okay, I've got one.
Man in the attic.
Fine, Mr. Know-It-All-About-Something-Finally,
you tell a story.
Once, not far from here,
four people set outon a cattle drive...
Robot gets boredand kills Fry with a hammer!
Sorry. Go on.
And then, while they sathelplessly around the campfire,
a demented, knife-wielding,escaped, lunatic, Libertarian,
zombie mutant snuck up and...
( screaming )
( whimpering )
Amy, what are you doing here?
I forgot to give you somethingbefore you left.
Is thatyour camouflage reflex,
or are you just happyto see me?
I love it out here, Amy.
I feel so manly.
I have blister,I-I spit,
and-and, of course,I tell no one my feelings.
But you still have them, right?
Oh, yes,but I keep them inside
until I can write themin my diary.
Ah... it's awonderful night.
It sure is.
I could just lie here beside youstaring at the sky all night.
( both moaning )
( loud rumbling )
( gasps )
Maybe we just made love.
( rumbling stops )
( mandibles clicking )
They're in the crater!
The rustlers musthave seen me coming
and run off scared.
Oh, Kif, you're so brave.
Shh. They'll hear us.