May 10, 2016 - Lecrae

  • 05/10/2016

China makes it illegal to seductively eat bananas online, and Larry discusses a controversial pre-graduation photo at West Point with Lecrae, Ricky Velez and Holly Walker.

Thank you very much! Thank you.

Thank you very much.You're very kind!

No, no, no. You're very kind.Thank you.

Welcome to The Nightly Show. I am Larry Wilmore.

Now, before we get started,guys, um,

I wanted to talkabout a consumer product.

Now, I knowwhat you're saying, uh,

"Why are we talkingabout products

instead of black (bleep)?"

Right? I agree, I agree.

Well, it just so happenswe're getting both.

REPORTER: It's a frozen treat called Little Obama.

It's glazed with chocolate, and its wrapping features

a smiling, uh, black child

wearing an earring while holding an ice cream cone.

REPORTER 2: Russia launching a brand-new cold war

with this new Obama-flavored ice cream.

(groaning, laughter)

Obama-flavored?

Mmm.

Mmm,tastes like menthol cigarettes

and health care. Mmm.

Mmm. Mmm.

Mmm. How...

how is it Obama-flavored?

Okay, there is so much wrongwith that, guys. Um...

First of all, (bleep) Russia.Secondly...

-(cheering and applause)-No.

That's just so wrong.You know, but...

They really got Obama down--

the earring,the rosy red cheeks, right?

The patented yellow shirt,right?

It's not like therearen't pictures of the man!

But I get it. Ha-ha.

Chocolate on the outside,vanilla on the inside.

(fake chuckling)Yeah.

Th-That's what they saidfor Or...

It should be half and half,right, if anything.

What are you gonna do for Trump,a Creamsicle?

Right? Orange on the outside,

white on the inside.

Or, or the Hillary Clinton bar,

whatever flavoryou want it to be,

unlessyou're lactose intolerant,

in which case,I would never assume

that you should be eating...Just like me, damn it!

All right, anyway,onto our top story.

Uh, so, some recent graduatesat West Point

have caused quite a stir.

REPORTER: The fist salute is sparking

some major outrage online.

The picture shows 16 black female cadets

and a Black Panther-style salute.

(groaning)

Yeah. Uh, right.

That's classic Black Pantherlong game, man, right?

First, convince a bunchof young Panther girls

to go to West Point,spend four years

going through rigorous training,stringent academic requirements,

taking oaths and (bleep),and then...

right when it's graduation day,"Fooled you, whitey!

"We Panthers!

We panthers!"

Right? Is that what they think?

The long game.

And, and, you know, if there'sa sneaky animal out there

that's tryingto hornswoggle America

with a subversive message,it's not a panther.

It's a fox. All right?

-All right.-(cheering and applause)

Boom. All right.

All right, Fox, what else?

Some are calling it racist.

Racist? How is it...

These women are willingto sacrifice their lives

for a country that's 78% white.

What-what makes you thinkthey hate white people?

I mean, you're acting

as if they're holdinga sign reading...

WILMORE (reading):

It just doesn't make sense.

And here's the other thing...

And, um, others, however,

are criticizing the salutefor being a political act.

REPORTER: To critics of the picture posted on social media

last week, the cadets' pose looks like an expression

of support for the Black Lives Matter movement...

-MAN: Hands up!-ALL: Don't shoot!

...a movement some believe is antipolice.

Some believe it was a good ideato make Obama ice cream.

Why do we keep listeningto some?

I'm not suresome should be our source.

Look, guys, a fist being raised

has nothing to dowith Black Panthers.

It's about black power.

I mean, s-sure, the BlackPanthers used that symbol,

but when athletes Tommie Smithand John Carlos

made this statementat the '68 Olympics,

they weren't pledgingtheir allegiance

to the Black Panthers.They were making a statement

about black empowerment,because in America, at the time,

there was no such thing.

(cheering and applause)

So...

s-so, why would the military beupset about some black women

who clearly feel empoweredby this great achievement?

REPORTER: West Point telling ABC News...

REPORTER (reading):

REPORTER 2: Defense Department rules say...

REPORTER 2 (reading):

Oh, okay. All right. No, no, no.

No, it makes sense.I mean, if you're a cadet

and you're raising your fistlike that,

that's a partisanpolitical activity.

O-Oh. Oh, man. Oh.

I think you better round upthe Class of 2011,

because they pulled this (bleep)at a concert.

(applause)

Oh, my God!Are those White Panthers?!

(gasps)

But seriously, when those mostlywhite cadets raised their fists,

it was a sign of solidarity,unity, and strength.

But when black women do it,we should all be offended?

All right. To get to the bottomof why they were doing this,

we turn to twoof the West Point cadets,

Melissa Jacobsand Andrea Murphy.

(cheering and applause)

Hey, guys.

Hi, Larry!

Great to be here!

Okay, all right, okay,so come clean, guys.

Seriously. You were doing theblack power fist, weren't you?

-No, not at all.-In fact, we're reshooting

our graduation phototo calm everybody down.

-Yeah! Say cheese! Cheese!-Cheese!

Wait. Wait, wait, wait,wait, wait.

Wait. Hold on. You-you just didthe black power fist again.

-You... -No, no, Larry.That was a-a mid-yawn stretch.

A mid-yawn stretch?

At the exact same time?

Larry, it's not uncommonfor women's bodies to sync up.

-Oh.-Periods, yawns.

-Yeah. Yeah.-We're on the same cycle.

Come on, guys.That's not a thing.

Wait, is it?

Larry, this has been takencompletely out of context.

We're not trying to do anything.

It was all coincidental.

-Oh. One more photo? Sure.-Okay.

-One, two, three. No justice,no peace! -No justice, no peace!

Okay! What...

No, no, no, no, no!

Okay, that was clearlya black power chant, you guys.

-No, Larry, I just sneezed.-Yeah.

(sneezing):No justice, no peace.

You both sneezed"no justice, no peace"?

Yeah, we said we're in sync.

Yeah, everything's got to beblack (bleep) with you, Larry.

-Yeah.-Wait. With m... No!

-You made it about black(bleep)! I didn't do it. -Look.

Look, look, look, look, look.We'll do another one,

-and we'll even keep our armslike this -Okay.

so there's no confusion.

-Okay. All right,so you're not gonna say -Okay?

or do anything politicalor black or...

-No. No, we're just gonna smile.-Okay.

-All right. Okay.-Look.

We intend to take overthis institution

and get justice for allour black brothers and sisters!

-(camera shutter clicking)-(applause and cheering)

Okay, I'm not even surewhat that was,

but it definitelywasn't just smiling.

Uh, Larry,we really don't understand

what you're seeingand hearing right now.

-Yeah, slow down, Fox & Friends. -Yeah.

-I'm not...-(laughter and groaning)

I'm not Fox & Friends, but you have...

Come on, guys, seriously.

You have to stop pretending

that that fist isn'tabout black power, seriously.

Sure, as soon as everyone elsestops pretending

that there is something wrong

with black womenhaving some pride.

-Yeah. Yeah.-MAN: Yeah.

(cheers and applause)

Right.

Seriously, we're goingto fight for this country.

Don't you want some powerup in there? Come on now.

-That's true. That's true.-(applause and cheering)

West Point cadets Melissa Jacobsand Andrea Murphy, everyone.

-(applause and cheering)-We'll be right back.

-Yeah.-That's a good point.

All right, welcome back.Thank you very much.

Now... China may be responsible

for manufacturingour Apple computers,

but there's another fruit

that the Asian super powerhas banned on all computers.

-China announced that they willban-- are you ready? -Yeah.

WOMAN: ...seductive consumptionof bananas

during Webcam live streams.

(laughter)

Seductive consumptionof bananas?

That's a trend?

Okay, this (bleep) isliterally B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

-Uh...-(laughter)

Thank you very much.

And... and as uncalled for

as a ten-year-old Gwen Stefanireference in 2016.

-(groaning and laughter)-So...

Oh, not Gwen Stefani,but the reference, guys.

(laughter)

So the Chinese governmentintroduced this anti-banana law

as a way to clamp down

on inappropriate contentfrom women online,

but does all banana-eatingby women

have to be considerederotic behavior?

Okay, we thought we'd find outin our newest segment,

"Grace ParraNon-Sexually Eats a Banana."

-(applause and cheering)-Hello! Hi, Larry.

Hello, hello.

Now many people believe that thetropical herbaceous fruit known

as a banana carriessexual connotations,

but there is absolutelyno reason that it should,

which is why I'm hereto show you three ways

to non-sexually eat a banana.

That is... that is perfect.

-Okay, take it away, Grace.-All right.

So number one--a knife and fork.

Now, after you remove the peel,like so...

Oh, yeah, just clean offthe bone like that.

(laughter)

You're gonna wantto cut into the banana, okay?

As you might, let's say, a pieceof fish or maybe a steak,

you know, from, of course,a chaste cow

that never once has had a boner.

-(laughter)-See? Clean.

Mmm. Mmm!

Delicious, Larry!I love it. Mmm.

What's up, baby?

Why you got to, you know,ruin eating a banana like that?

-What's your problem?-Hmm?

Oh, God, no, it's not him. Uh...

Larry, who is... who is...who is this guy?

Uh, I'm sorry, Grace.

That's our resident Nightly Show pervert, uh, Brance, uh...

-(laughter)-Brance Crantly.

That's right. Esquire, baby.

-Okay, you are not a lawyerfor sure. -All right, mm-hmm.

And I was in the middleof this demonstration, so...

I know. It's pretty lame.

You're sucking all the fun

out of sucking on a banana,sweetheart, huh?

-(whooping and cheering)-That's right.

Why don't I show you howa real lady eats a banana?

-I keep one right here.-AUDIENCE: Oh!

Okay. That's disgusting.

That way it's at the perfecttemp-- 12 degrees Donginheit.

-You know what I'm saying?-Donginheit?

Yeah, it's a...it's a scientific term.

This is a big issue for me, man.

-This like my Tiananmen Square.-Okay.

-You got to eat a banana sexylike it were a... -No! No!

-Mmm.-No! No, that's disgusting.

-Mmm. Mmm.-Larry! See, Larry... Larry,

he's perpetuating the ideathat women can't even eat fruit

without being sexualizedright here.

-I agree.-I don't know what that means.

Well, that's not my fault,Larry.

It's not my fault that

when a lady touches nature'scandy against her lips,

I feel a little tingledown in my gennies.

-It's not my fault. -Oh, my God."Gennies"? -Nature's candy?

Gennies? No. Larry,this is deeply offensive, okay?

-Mm-hmm. -I agree. You're right.-Thank you.

Look, Brance,let Grace show us another way

to non-sexually eat the banana.

-Yes, thank you.-You mean, ruin it?

-Sure, go ahead, do it.-Jesus Christ. Okay.

-(loud sniffing) -Thank youso much. Now onto number two.

-On the cob. First...-Mmm.

Oh, yes, you want to piercethe peeled banana...

-Yeah. -...with a spearon both sides.

Spear is good.That's nice.

Mm-hmm.

-Now once it's on a stick...-Stick it.

-...you, uh, rotate and nibble.-WILMORE: All right.

You rotate and nibble.It's like corn on the cob.

-You see?-WILMORE: Mm-hmm.

Mmm. It's quiet,um, it's polite,

and you still get all thepotassium that you really need.

Yawn! Come on!

Look, if Mama needssome potassium,

let me show you how to do it.

A little techniqueI called "The Double Nana."

Right? What? I'm getting what?-Jesus Christ.

-Oh, my God! -No! No!-(laughter)

I can't get... I can'tfind my mouth.

-WILMORE: Brance? Brance?-Your mouth is right there.

-There's bananas everywhere.-Stop it!

-Whoa. Oh, my God.-Stop it, Brance.

-There's bananas everywhere.-This isn't sexy. -No!

-Put down the two bananas!-You're not doing it.

-This is not sexy.-Mm-hmm. -Put down...

This is just not attra...Who raised you?

Take the bananas outof your mouth, Brance.

-Now, Grace, continue, please.-What?

-We still have time for onemore. -They're so not in...

Oh. Oh, really?Oh, you want one more?

-WILMORE: Yes, please.-Okay, how about this?

A third non-sexual option is toeat your bananas mashed, okay?

You just takethis meat tenderizer.

-WILMORE: Uh-huh. -And thenyou just... you mash it.

-WILMORE: Oh! Oh!-You just mash it.

-You mash it good. -Jesus.-WILMORE: Oh!

You mash it, huh? You mash ittill they give you respect.

WILMORE: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,Grace, Grace, Grace, you seem

to have a lot of angerfor that banana.

-You mash it.-Yeah, baby.

Oh, anger? Well, maybe

that's 'causeI can't make a simple point

about China's sexist censorshipof young women

without this jackass coming in,sniffing my head...

(applause and cheering)

...and making the mostbaseless... -Good point.

...sex jokes imaginable.

Wow. This really turned

into a will they-won't theysitch, ain't it?

Hey, spoiler alert!They won't!

Well, we'll see about that.

Look, I'm real sorry, Grace, uh,

but, uh, this is allgetting kind of messy.

-Yeah. It is.-I really apologize.

Larry, I don't call this messy.

I call this not messy enough,all right?

-(laughter)-Okay.

I'm gonna bring out my lastand final technique

-called "whip up the tip" righthere. -Oh, Jesus Christ. Larry!

-Just, oh, yeah!-WILMORE: Whip up the tip?

-That's just stereotypical.-You can't use too much whip.

-WILMORE: Okay, all right,that's disgusting. -Oh, my God.

-No, no, no, no. -You realizewe're recording this, right?

We don't need that.Give it up for Grace Parra

-and not Brance Crantly,everyone. -(applause & cheering)

-I could make an awesome...-We'll be right back.

That's disgusting. I justwanted you to eat a banana.

All right! Welcome back!I'm here with my panel.

First up, Nightly Show contributor Ricky Velez.

(cheering, applause)

And Nightly Show contributorHolly Walker.

(cheering, applause)

And his memoir Unashamed is in stores now,

and his current album Anomaly

debuted at number oneon the Billboard Top 200,

please welcomeGrammy Award-winning rap artist,

-Lecrae! Yeah!-(cheering, applause)

And for everyone at home,join our conversation right now

on Twitter @NightlyShowusing the hashtag #Tonightly.

Okay, so we were talkingabout this earlier in the show.

A group of young, black femalecadets at West Point

came under investigationafter posing for a photo

in a clenched-fist salute.

Some people were saying theywere taking a political stance.

Uh... I thinkthey definitely knew

what they were doingin that moment.

Does anyone here thinkthey were making

a political statement, though?

I mean,they could have been making

a political statement,we don't know,

but the army makes politicalstatements all the time.

Remember"Don't ask, don't tell"?

-Mm-hmm.-You know what I mean?

Um, so I havea political statement:

-Lighten up. Lighten up. Lightenup. -(applause, whooping)

-WILMORE: Yeah.-Yeah.

I feel like a...a bunch of girls got together

to take some pictures,it was like, hey,

we're gonna go this way, okay,then we're gonna go...

diva pose, then we're gonna goSoul Sista number one,

-Right. Yeah.-and... you know what I mean,

have a good time.First of all, I mean,

let's be clear, they...this is a group

of young black ladies who are...not only went to West Point

-but graduated, so, like...-Yeah. -Right.

-You know what I mean?-WILMORE: Very proud of it.

And, uh,gonna take some pictures.

I mean-- before I say thisI would just want to say

I love the military,they're amazing,

-LECRAE: Uh-oh.-I've done shows for them,

I mean, I have familythat was military--

but the picture is concerningto a point.

I didn't knowwe were still using swords.

(laughter)

WILMORE: That... that's the partyou have an issue with, Rick.

I knew the militaryhad some cutbacks,

but I didn't knowwe went from...

drone to sword.

WILMORE: You got to getreally close to people.

Like, now I understandwhy ISIS is such a problem.

-Like, you know? It's...-Yeah. That's...

We're over there,"En garde, (bleep)!"

-Like, come on.-WILMORE: I know.

-It's stupid.-Why do you think people...

why do you think peopleuse the word "divisive"?

Why would someone think thatthat would be divisive, though?

-Come on, they're 21.-Sure.

-LECRAE: They graduated.-Yes! -Exac... Agreed.

-They were having a good time.-Agreed. -WILMORE: Yeah.

Their mentor says theywere doing it as a shout-out

to Beyoncé's "Formation"--let's see that picture.

Everybody remember, this wasafter, I think, the Super Bowl.

They were... they were doing...

Now let's see the pictureof the girls again.

-VELEZ: Those are two differentoutfits, though. -Yeah.

Okay, so... can... can we justblame Beyoncé for all of this?

-(laughter)-What do you think?

I blame social media.

WILMORE: It is... it'skind of social media's fault.

-VELEZ: It has to be.-Whoever social media is,

I blame you, wherever you're at.

WALKER:The only... the only person

that needs to be blamed--not Beyoncé--

Jay Zand Becky with the Good Hair.

Now, those are the only peoplethat need to be bl...

-VELEZ: It's Becky's fault?-Yup.

VELEZ: Now, I am telling you,if you didn't listen

to that Lemonade album,you can't keep up

-with politics anymore,it's ridiculous. -Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Every time whensomething happens in politics,

-it goes back to Beyoncé.She's... -Yes. Yes. -I know.

She's mad at Jay, not America.

Right.

-(laughter)-LECRAE: I just want to say...

-WILMORE: Yeah. -the Bey Hiveis gonna sting you tonight.

-Just... Watch your back.-WALKER (laughing): Yeah.

It wouldn't be the first time.

Bring it.

WILMORE: Oh, see, they'renot kidding around, are they?

-Okay. Okay.-VELEZ: Why do you guys turn?

-WALKER: Yeah, I know. I know.-Jesus Christ!

-But they are powerful.-Have a backbone!

The Bey Hive is powerful.

Who should they bemore concerned about,

the Bey Hive or the military?

-(laughter)-WALKER: The Bey Hive.

The Bey Hive will come at you.

Y'all don't understand,I grew up before the Internet.

I can turn off my phone.I'm not afraid of it.

-(cheering)-Okay? I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

-(applause, whistling)-It's bull(bleep)! -Yeah.

-I'm not afraid of Twitter.-Touché. Touché.

WILMORE: So, do you thinkthe chatter about it

is much ado about nothingor do you think these girls

are actually gonna get punished?

Uh, they'll probably get a...I hope they only get

a slap on the wrist.I hope that that's all they get.

-Slap on the fist? -Because...Uh, a slap on the fist.

-Mm-hmm.-Because... uh, because...

-I'm still gonna do this.-Because they had to work

too hard to get in, they had towork too hard to get through,

and they had to work too hardto get out, so...

-they deserve to graduate. Yeah.-Yeah, I agree. -Agreed.

Agreed, and I do thinkit's amazing--

-I mean, there were16 out of the 17 that... -Yes.

-Or 16 out of 18.-Yeah, that one girl... -Right.

She took the picture. You know?She's all, "I'll take this.

-Don't worry about it." Yeah.-WILMORE: Yeah, exactly.

-But, uh... -No, y-y'alljust get over there,

-make a fist, make a fist.-Y'all get together real quick.

-Black power, right?Black power. -I'll take it.

I'll take the picture,I got you.

What-what filter you wantto use? What filter you want...

No, but... it's amazingwhat they did,

but at the endof the day, uh,

-the military doeshave its rules. -WILMORE: Yeah.

And it does, uh... onceyou are a GI, that, I mean...

-LECRAE: Yeah.-WILMORE: Yeah.

You guys got to kind ofplay by the rules.

-and, um, ex...-Absolutely.

But you can be proudof your accomplishment

-without makinga political statement. -Yeah.

It's-it's not the same thing.

I don't think it was...it wasn't political.

-I don't think so either.-But we live in such a...

a racially and politicallydivided country right now,

where something like that comingout of... the 16 girls

that are in this graduatingclass doing this

-means something now. -It meanssomething to all their people,

-not necessarily...-Yes, but why would you say

it's not political?'Cause I don't think

there's anything wrongwith it being political.

Like, I haveno problem with that.

I think there's a problemwith punishing them for it.

-LECRAE: Yeah.-But-but I don't have a problem.

-(cheering, applause)-Well, I think...

I, like, I, like, I don't buy...I think it's (bleep) they said,

"We were just excited, yeah."No, no, no, no, no, no.

Some people were like this,some were like this.

Well, I mean, mind you,the fist alone--

the fist is a symbol of unity,it's a symbol of-of resistance,

it's a symbol of strength. So ithas all kind of connotations.

When the Black Panthers,particularly, used it,

that was a party, that was apolitical party. I don't b...

I d... You know,some people would say,

"Oh, that's domestic terrorism"or whatever they would say

about the Black Panthers,but maybe some of 'em were,

but all of 'em weren't.

Um, some of 'em fed my motherlunch on-on Mondays

-when she didn't have any food.Um... -(cheering, applause)

but... but outside of that,I would-I would just say,

you know, you-you don't...we don't know

what these girls meantwhen they put their fist up.

We have no idea.You're-you're punishing them

for what someone elsemay have done,

may have used the fist for.But we don't have...

We have zero ideawhy these girls

-had their fist up.-I put it like this:

-I don't care. I ain't madat them either way. -Yeah.

-I really don't care. -Yeah.They are going to defend us.

-Exactly. -They are going to betaking care of us.

-Whe-When you put your lifeon the line... -Yup, yup.

When you put your lifeon the line for the country,

if you do a little bit of this,I ain't mad at you.

-I ain't mad, either. Yeah.-We'll be right back.

ANNOUNCER: If you live in New York City or are

planning to visit, grab tickets to The Nightly Show.

All right, I want to thankmy panelists-- Ricky Velez,

Holly Walker and Lecrae.So, we're almost out of time,

but before we goI'm gonna keep it 100.

Keep it 100 for you guys.Okay, so tonight's question

is from an audience membernamed Safiya. Let's take a look.

Hey, Larry,would you rather have

the personthat you love the most

or the personthat you hate the most

have the abilityto read your thoughts?

Keep it 100.

Mm-hmm...

Um, I would definitely not wantthe person I love the most

being able to read my thoughts.

I don't care if you hate me,

'cause that's all I'm gonna bethinking about you.

Thanks for watching.Good Nightly, everyone.

The hate, right?Was I...

Oh, man, look atall my stickers!

Thank you.Oh, my God.

-♪ -(cheering, applause)