March 15, 2016 - #TamponTuesday & Donald Trump's Media Savvy

  • 03/15/2016

Holly Walker reports on free tampons in public schools, and Larry discusses Donald Trump's manipulation of the media with Jussie Smollett, Rory Albanese and Franchesca Ramsey.

Whew! Thank you very much!

Thank you so much!Such a great crowd. Oh.

So kind. Please.Thank you so much.

Please have a seat.

So kind. Thank you very much.

-Welcome to The Nightly Show. -(whooping)

No, I appreciate the "ooh"and the "ow." Yeah.

It's very nice. I'm LarryWilmore. We got a great show

for you guys tonight. JussieSmollett from TV's Empire

joining us on the panel,

because it's Smollett Week hereon The Nightly Show.

We had, uh,his sister on last night.

Oh, you know, but first, guys,

we have to talk about abizarre story out of Minnesota.

REPORTER: On Wednesday, diners at Joe's Crab Shack

in Roseville, Minnesota, received an unpleasant surprise

at dinner when they saw a picture of two black men

being lynched as part of the decorations

next to their table.

-(gasping) -This is true,you guys. This is true.

The photo was, uh, taken at ahanging in Texas in, like, 1895,

and Joe's Crab Shackadded a "funny caption"

to one of the dying men that read, "All I said was

-that I didn't like the gumbo." -(gasping)

See? Now, that's the problemwith decorating

your chain restaurantwith pieces of American history.

Right?If you're gonna keep it 100,

a lot of American historyain't too appetizing.

Now... It's true.

If you're gonna keep it 100,if you're gonna keep it 100...

Now, Joe's Crab Shack has pulledthe offending picture,

but I think their possiblereplacements aren't any better.

For instance, they've got...

WILMORE (reading):

That's just wrong. That's just wrong. Or...

WILMORE (reading):

Come on, guys. Or this one...

WILMORE (reading):

I agree. I agree.That one went too far.

I agree. I agree with you guys.

Wow, man, it seems likewe've gone a couple minutes

without mentioning Donald Trump.That's amazing.

So... I know. It's weird.So I guess we need to rectify

-that situation.-(siren wailing)

Oh, no, you guys!You know what that means?

Oh, my God. I almost forgot.It's Tampon Tuesday.

-♪ -I know!

I almost forgot. Oh. Oh.

Oh, my God.

At least these...at least these are the ones

without applicators. Those hurt.

Oh, my God. I can't believe...

I can't believe I almost forgot.Now, of course, uh...

I'm sorry.

Every tampon Tuesday, uh, The Nightly Show covers

the latest in tampon news.But first, the tampans...

"The tampan."

Trying to get a brotherjust to cover tampons is enough,

all right?

The Tampon Tuesday theme song.

So take it away, Grace.

♪ o.b., Kotex

♪ Tampax Pearl

♪ Don't you worry,we got you, girl ♪

♪ 'Cause you're a goddess,a princess ♪

♪ You know you're a queen

♪ And Wilmore's talking'bout feminine hygiene ♪

♪ Tampon Tuesday, y'all.

-Yeah!-(cheering and applause)

Tampon Tuesday theme song!

Grace Parra, everybody!Grace Parra.

All right. Okay.

So, you might be asking,"Larry, why is there

"enough lady napkin newsto justify an entire beloved

and long-runningweekly segment?"

Because, becauseof one pesky little fact:

REPORTER: New York and 39 other states impose sales taxes

on feminine hygiene products while exempting other products

mostly used by men, like Rogaine and condoms.

-(gasping, booing)-Come on, g...

Is that surprising to anyone,that in a country founded

by men, run by men,the tax code doesn't protect

women's necessitiesbut it does protect men

trying to grow a hairier dongand wrapping

that newly-haired...that newly-haired dong in latex?

Thanks, America.

Thank you.

And if you don't agree with mytheory about the men in charge

being behind this,you know who agrees with me?

The man in charge.

I have to tell youI have no idea

why states would tax theseas luxury items.

-I-I suspect it's 'cause menwere making the laws -Yeah.

when those taxes were passed.

Good for you, Obama.

Um, although that did looka little awkward, didn't it?

Looked like he was havingthe talk with her or something,

you know? Uh...

Is that Obama's, like,love child or something?

All right. Now, I getthat this issue may seem trivial

to those who have moneyor a penis or a money penis.

But... you might...you might have a money penis.

I don't know, okay?

But just imagine how you'd feelif you had to pay extra

to take care of somethingyour body does naturally.

You know, like, uh, if you hadto pay a buck per fart.

You got to fart.

Why you got to pay a buck?

-(cheering and applause)-Why?

I don't understand it.

Tampons are a medical necessity!

They're not a luxury.

-(cheering and applause)-Oh. It's true.

And, uh, by the way,I owe you guys a dollar.

Sorry.

By the way, in rehearsal,one of these fell like this.

Yeah. So...

But don't worry, guys. There is some good news for Team Tamp,

and it comes to us from a high school in Queens, New York.

REPORTER: Now the school has free dispensers

in the women's bathrooms, with tampons and sanitary napkins.

It's one of 25 middle and high schools

in Queens and the Bronx that's part of a pilot program.

All should have dispensers operating

by the end of the month.

Well, this is great news,but why don't all public schools

offer free tamponsfor their students?

What, are-are schools worriedthat giving out free tampons

is just gonna encourage kidsto menstruate?

Right?

I mean,

abstinence-only education

is definitely not going to workin this situation.

All right,for more on these free tampons

in New York schools, we goto our very own Holly Walker

-at P.S. 458 in the Bronx.-(cheering and applause)

Hey, Holly!So, Holly, how are, uh...

how are female students reactingto New York schools

administering the free tampons?

(Valley girl accent):Well, usually, us millennials

don't give an "F" about lawsand stuff,

but these free tamponsare pretty chill. (chuckles)

Holly, I'm-I'm asking whathigh school girls think. Uh...

(regular accent, quietly):Shh! I'm undercover, Larry.

21 Jump Street-style.

You're posingas a high school student? Why?

Because I need the tampons.

Oh.

(Valley girl accent):Oh, hi, Briley!

Want to try and scoresome... Spice Girl tickets?

Spice Girl tickets?Holly, Holly, you don't sound

very believableas a high school student.

You don't understand, Larry.That tampon tax is killing me,

and-and I've gotstudent loan debt.

I-I mean,I will have student loan debt

once I go to college.

Ugh, if only I were old enoughto vote

-for Bernie Sanders.-Holly...

Stop it, Holly! You're nota high school student.

You work here at the show.

Look, I get

that you probably can affordthat tax-free Rogaine.

(laughter)

-I don't use Rogaine.-Yeah, obviously.

-Hey.-(laughter, applause)

Holly, I shave my head.I don't need...

I don't know how many timesI have to say this, all right?

Oh, yeah.Hag tash calm down.

(laughter)

(applause and cheering)

-No. Holly, it's "hashtag."-Oh, whatever.

You're not...you're not fooling anybody.

Look, Larry, until malelawmakers eliminate tampon taxes

and start treating womenlike actual grown-ups,

-I'm staying right here.-(applause and cheering)

Yeah.

-Wow.-Yeah. Well...

Hey, what's up, Holly?

-Oh, my God.-Hi.

-Is that Mike? Mike Yard?-What's up?

Hey, Holly,I got my mom's Monte Carlo.

Want to go to Makeout Point?What's up?

Oh, I can't.I have math class.

Aw!

Mike, you're pretendingto be in high school, too?

Hell, yeah, Larry. They aregiving out free rubbers here.

(cheers and applause)

Rubbers? This is insane.

Holly Walker and Mike Yard,everybody.

Holly Walker and Mike Yard,everybody.

-(applause and cheering)-Welcome back.

Now, March isWomen's History Month,

and this year,there's a lot to celebrate.

We're on track to have the firstfemale presidential nominee.

And previouslymale-dominated jobs

are seeing more female hires,

particularlyin the ghostbusting industry.

-(laughter, cheering)-Right?

Uh, so here with her thoughtson Women's History Month

is Nightly Show contributorRobin Thede.

-(applause and cheering)-Thank you. Thank you.

-Welcome to the show, Robin.-Thanks, Larry.

Now for Women's History Month,I just wanted to shed light

on a phenomenon that can helppeople understand women better.

Oh, that's great.Uh, what is it?

Black lady sign language.

-(whooshing)-(laughter)

-There it is.-Wow.

Okay, this is kind of cool.

So what is black ladysign language then?

Well, you might have noticed

-that black ladies use a lotof hand gestures. -Right.

-You know, non-verbalcommunication. -Right.

Chances are there's a black ladyin your office,

-and she's probably namedRhonda. -Mm-hmm. -(laughter)

And you might misunderstandher sometimes, right?

Like, you might think Rhonda'sbeing hostile when she's not,

or you might think she's notbeing hostile when she is.

-(laughter) -Oh, wow. I can seehow that would be problematic.

-Right.-Yes.

So, think of this as my publicservice announcement

so you can understand Rhondaa little bit better.

-That's great. Okay, so how doesit work? - Yeah. Okay.

-All right, let me give youa few examples. -All right.

Number one--the single hand clap.

-(whooshing)-All right.

-Now this can be used to expresshappiness or anger. -Mm-hmm.

And learningto tell the difference

can actually save your life.All right, watch.

-Oh, okay, great, great. Okay.-All right.

-Oh, it's my song!-(applause and cheering)

-Oh.-Right? Right?

Wow. Okay.

It's very different from,"Bitch, what'd you say to me?"

(laughter,applause and cheering)

WILMORE:Okay.

Uh, uh, uh, I know. At firstglance, they can look the same.

-But weren't those the same?-No, no, no.

-No, no, not at all, Larry.-Oh. Okay.

Now, here, just watch itin slow motion.

-All right.-All right.

(slowly):My... song.

-WILMORE: Okay.-Versus...

(slowly):"Bitch... what?!

(laughter)

See, the finger roll isthe subtle difference. Yup.

-Oh, my God!-Yup.

I would never knowto look for that thing.

-Yes, yes, yes.-It's the finger thing.

That's right.Now you will.

-Now you will.-Wow. That's fascinating.

-Black lady sign language.-Thank you. All right.

All right, well, let's move onto our next gesture, okay?

-Sure. Okay.-This is the double hand clap

-versus the double hand clapon syllables. -Mm-hmm.

-(whooshing)-All right. -Okay.

Now, this one's easier to spot,but it can be deceptive.

-Right. Okay. All right.-So check this out. All right.

Yay! Great jobon your performance.

-Oh. Yeah, that's good. Yeah.-Yeah.

See, that-that just lookslike regular applause, right?

-Well, that's correct,because it is. -Oh, okay.

But compare that to the doublehand clap on syllables.

WILMORE:Syllables, okay.

-What did you say to me, Larry?-(laughter)

(applause and cheering)

Um...

I didn't... I didn'tsay anything. I was just...

Don't interrupt me, Larry.

-(applause and cheering)-All right.

-I'm just kidding.I'm just kidding. -Oh. Oh.

-I'm just kidding.-Okay.

But now you can see howeffective it is, right?

-Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.-Oh, wow. Yeah.

-Man, I was... I was scared.Yeah. -The double... Yeah.

The double hand clapon syllables is used

to emphasizes a point. Yes.

-Wow. That was so effective,Robin. -Yeah.

That's, um... It reallyemphasizes an angry point.

-Right? Uh-huh. -Oh, yeah, well,not necessarily.

-Oh, okay.-It's tricky because

it can be usedfor anger or excitement.

Such as, "Oh, my God,these shoes are on sale!"

-(laughter, cheering)-You got it. You got it, yeah.

Nice! That's crazy, man.That's great.

Okay, now, we're only...we're allowed to do that.

-(laughter)-Oh. Oh, I'm sorry. Okay.

It's cool, but, uh,don't let it happen again.

-(laughter)-All right. -Okay.

-(applause and cheering)-Yeah. -Got it. Got it.

-Okay.-Got it.

All right, so,time for our final

-black lady sign languagegesture. -Okay.

-Now, this-this is a big one.-Mm-hmm.

The double hand wave versusthe double hand wave pullback.

-Mm-hmm. Ooh.-(whooshing)

Wow. That sounds complicated.

-It is complicated.-Okay.

-But you've been doing wellso far. -Okay.

So, all right, let's startwith the double hand wave.

-Okay, double hand wave.-All right, all right.

-So, see, I'm just wavingboth hands. -Oh.

Just double hand wave. Hi!It's cute, right?

-Oh. Oh, yeah, I like that.That's good. -Say hi!

-Yeah. Hey! Hey!-Right? Right? Right? Right?

-Great.-Yeah, that's nice.

-But if I do the doublehand wave pullback... -Okay.

Who said what to me?

(applause and cheering)

(Wilmore clears his throat)

See-see this is a womanwho's at her wit's end.

-Yeah. Mm-hmm.-She's not in a space to reason.

-You should probably leavethe room. -Wow. -(laughter)

I think I saw that on WorldStaronce, that double thing.

-Yes. -Yeah.-(laughter)

-Absolutely. Very good. -It wasvery... It was a scary moment.

-Yeah. Okay. -It... Yes, no,it can be quite a thing.

All right, well, so, let'swrap this up by showing you

-all three in action, all right?-Oh, great.

This is what I like to call

-the black lady sign languagecombo platter. -(whooshing)

All right, to better understandthe wonderful black ladies

in your life,you have to pay attention

and say good-bye to allyour preconceived notions.

And if you ever get confused,just rewatch this segment.

-(applause and cheering)-Do you hear me, Larry?

-Yes, yes.-Okay.

I hear you. Robin Thede,everybody. We'll right back.

-I hear what you're saying.-Thank you. Thank you.

All right, welcome back.I'm here with my panel.

First up, Nightly Show contributor Rory Albanese.

(applause and cheering)

And Nightly Show contributorFranchesca Ramsey.

(applause and cheering)

You can see himin the spring premiere episode

of Empire, "Death Will Have Its Day,"

on Wednesday, March 30at 9:00 p.m. on Fox.

Actor Jussie Smollett,everybody.

(applause and cheering)

And for everyone at home,join our conversation right now

on Twitter @NightlyShow,using the hashtag #Tonightly.

Okay, so, we've been talkingabout Trump this week.

SMOLLETT:Oh, damn. Oh!

-And we've talked about himevery night. -SMOLLETT: Oh!

Well, here's the thing. Here'sthe thing I wanted to cover.

So, the media's beenextremely Trump heavy

in their coverageof this election.

I mean, he's gotten moreair time-- this is true--

than the entireDemocratic field

and three times more attentionthan Rubio and Cruz, okay.

So, do we think Trumpis the creation of the media?

Is he the creation of media,or is he just exploiting it?

Ooh, I thinkhe's just exploiting it.

-Hell, yeah.-He's good at it, though.

I have to remind you that he hada very mediocre television show

-filled with...-(laughter)

-How dare you, Franchesca!-(laughter)

-Listen, it was fullof D-list celebrities. -Yeah.

-And it was ratings gold...-D list?

-Um, Gary Busey. Hello!-Oh, my God.

ALBANESE: Um, hello.National treasure Gary Busey.

SMOLLETT: I think, though,at the same time, though,

what we have to realizeis that yes,

he's-he's manipulatingthe media,

but the media is letting himfor ratings.

Do you know what I'm saying?I think that

we can all agree with that.You know what I'm saying?

It's just,and we've come into...

we're in this world right nowwhere we're... we're stuck

-with this reality-TV world,-WILMORE: Yeah.

but this is...reality TV is fun,

but not when we're talkingabout the presidency

-of the United Statesof America. -RAMSEY: Whoo!

-(cheering, applause) -That'snot what we're talking about.

But it's funnythat you said that,

'cause here's a quotefrom Les Moonves--

he's the head of CBS now.

He says-- he's talkingabout the coverage of Trump.

He says, "But, you know--it may not be good for America,

"but it's damn good

for CBS, that's all I got to say."

He's admitting it's a horrible thing!

So... are we... is the media...

SMOLLETT: Yo, at leastthe brother is admitting it.

-Yes. -'Cause allthe other people are like,

"Aw, yeah..." Well,they know that it's the truth.

It's the truth. It's horribleto say, but it's the truth.

But I feel like the media's,like, in an abusive relationship

-with Trump, you know whatI'm saying? -RAMSEY: No.

-It's all right, baby, I'm notgonna... -No, because to say

that they're in an abusiverelationship with Trump

would be to saythat they are being abused

and they are not victims.

The media's not victimsand Trump is not a victim.

So for that, they're notin an abusive relationship.

But America is the victim!

We are the victim.Of course, of course.

Or we're going to beif we continue to be like,

Ah-ha-ha-ha, Trump,ha-ha-ha-ha, Trump,"

until we're like,"Holy (bleep), that's Trump,

and he's in the freakin'White House."

WILMORE: Well,we've been saying that, right?

Well, first of all,let me just say this,

'cause I think throughsome sort of media conglomerate,

Les Moonves is our boss.

I think what you saidis great, Les. Uh...

-(laughter) -Good call,Mr. Moonves, uh, good...

Um, but I think... the thingthat's odd to me about this

is why we're all so surp...I'm surprised we're so surprised

that this is the guy.

Like, our leaders area reflection of our society.

This is our society.

We prioritize fame,we prioritize, like, capitalism,

-greed, all the (bleep) Trumpstands for, -Mm-hmm. Right.

and now we have himcoming to the...

-Like, this is on us, do youknow what I'm saying? -Yeah.

I agree, I agree with that,I agree with that,

but there are different typesof prioritizing of fame

and wealth and things like that.

Are we also a nationthat supposedly prioritizes

racism and bigotry

-and building walls... -RAMSEY:That's what built this country!

So that's really whatwe're talking about.

-Know what I'm saying?-No, I agree with you,

but I'm saying, are we a nationthat supposedly does that? No.

But historically speaking, arewe an extremely racist nation?

-Yes. Yes, we are. -That's whatwe need to be talking about.

'Cause to me,it's not about the money.

Listen, politics is about money.

At the end of the day,that's what their job is to do.

Their job is to raise fundsfor their campaign,

which is absolute bull(bleep)to begin with anyway.

-(whooping, applause)-But the point is...

the point is,the point is, though,

is that their jobis to raise money.

We're talkingabout more than money.

There's nothing wrongwith money.

WILMORE:You're talking about candidates?

Yeah. What's wrong with thatis when money is then attached

to... hate.

And to me,Trump is the mogul of hate.

WILMORE: But here-here'sthe thing, Jussie.

Trump isn't raising moneyand he's not spending money.

This is what I mean.

The media ishis campaign partner in this.

ALBANESE: Like, I agree--the media is exploiting him.

WILMORE: Well, I wouldn't saythey're exploiting him.

No, I... no, I thinkthey are exploiting him,

'cause this... like,we're doing it right now.

Like, this isa money-making industry,

talking about Trump--we're doing a show

-Very true. Very true.-about it right now, right?

Yeah, but we were doing showsbefore Trump was here,

-we'll do shows after Trump.-But CNN was doing shows

-before Trump, too.I'm saying right now -Right.

the way the media is run--and it's broken,

the whole CNN, MSNBC system

is the same onthe entertainment rating system.

They just want ratings.

So Trump is the way to getratings, so it makes sense

that they're gonna betalking about him 24/7.

No, I understand that,but it's not... I mean,

it's not that clean, becausehe's running for president.

-Right. -It's not like he'sjust saying this crazy (bleep)

in his living room,and some cameras showed up--

"You (bleep) gotto watch this (bleep).

I mean, he's sayingsome crazy (bleep)."

But, you know, it's like,"Who is this guy!

"Thank-thank you, CNN!

"I never would've knownabout this guy.

But I'm gonna vote for himfor president."

But I'll give you... like,I'll give you an example.

Like, you know, I was at The Daily Show for a long time,

-when Bush became president.-Right.

Eight years of Bushat a comedy show--

but people were buyingsummer houses on that guy.

You know what I mean?So, like, there's a part of it

that's like, "All right,eight years of Trump--

like, I'm getting a jet ski."You know, like, it's, like...

See, we're all... like, youknow, there is a feeding frenzy

around the clown, and he isthe clown with tiny hands.

-We know that, you know? But...-WILMORE: We do know that.

There's a feeding frenzy.

WILMORE: Do you think the mediaplays favorites?

-What are we talking about?What, what? -Do-do you think

the media plays favoritesoutside of getting ratings,

do you think they actually playfavorites in their coverage?

Sure, I think they do,and I think that that's the...

that's the terrible thingabout the media,

especially in thisday and age is that...

I'm sorry, I'm an absolute1,000% liberal.

But I shouldn'teven be looking at any network

and looking at a journalistand seeing

that they're obviouslyliberal or conservative.

I actually, as a journalist,I should be looking at

journalism and I should belooking at news channels

as only the truth,because there's-there's

always three sides to the story:

there's your side,my side and the truth.

If anything, news organizationsare supposed to be

only reporting the truthand the facts

-and we're supposedto make our decisions. -Yeah,

it-it really does feellike a reality show.

-Yeah. -Yeah.-I mean, the GOP

is like an episodeof The Bachelor at this point.

I... Ben Carson is the blackgirl that never had a chance.

Good-bye, I have to go.Farewell.

Honestly. And Donald Trumpis the unhinged drama queen

who doesn't evenlike the bachelor

and just wants screen timeand her own spinoff.

-Wow. -(cheering, applause)-And that's why

-they're gettingso much attention. -So sad.

It's the exact same thing.

It's what we've been reduced to.All right. We'll be right back.

-♪ -(cheering, applause)

YARD: If you live in the New York City area

or are planning to visit,

grab some free tickets to The Nightly Show.

Thanks to my panelists RoryAlbanese, Franchesca Ramsey

and Jussie Smollett.We're almost out of time,

but before we goI'm gonna keep it 100.

100 for you guys.

Tonight's question's froman audience member named Gina.

Let's take a look.

If you could legalize any crime,what would it be?

For real-- keep it 100.

-Any crime?-Whoa.

How about s-strangling...

a certainpresidential candidate?

-Yeah!-Yeah.

Any crime!Thanks for watching.

That's probably gonnaget me in trouble, you guys.

Don't forget to ask me your KeepIt 100 questions on Twitter.

Good Nightly, everyone.I can't believe I said that.

-Good answer.-Is it?

-♪ -(cheering, applause)

MAN: Ooh, sorry.

All right, I'm herewith Jussie Smollett.

It's time for the gamewe like to call Keep It 100.

Keep It... 100.

All right,you know how this works.

Yeah, I knowhow this (bleep) works.

-Take your tea.-And I'm very annoyed,

-because my little sisterwas on the show... -No, no, no.

yesterday,and I gave the question,

-'cause y'all tweeted me.-No, no. No, no, no.

-And told me to DM you.-No, no, no, no...

-Look...-Sliding up in my DMs, like...

We got you... Yeah,but you-you got her on that.

-You really got her in that.-Yeah, I did. (cackles)

Yeah, see? You know...You enjoyed that.

-You enjoyed it.-Yeah, I did.

Okay, here's your question.Okay...

-You and a lot of your familyhave activists, right? -Mm-hmm.

Okay, so, who do you thinkhad it tougher in history--

black people with slaveryor Jewish people with Hitler?

Oh, that is fucked up.

Journey said to ask that?

-WILMORE: Mm-mmm.-Oh.

This is from us. I'm justkidding, don't answer that.

-Here's a question from yoursister. -I was about to be...

Jessie, can you or can you notbelch the chorus

to "I Will Always Love You"?

WILMORE:You have to belch the chorus

to "I Will Always Love You".

-(clears throat)-(audience cheering, applauding)

And then you have to answerthis question.

Okay, hold on.Hold on.

(belching):And...

I...

will always

love you.

(cheering, applause)

♪ You, I

I think he did it.

All right.

Who had it worse?

Who had it worse, your blackside or your Jewish side?

I just feel like that...

we should notbe comparing those two.

That's what you get for that.

-No, there you go. He got 100.-I'm not comparing those two.

-Come on, I got the Keep It 100,though. -Give it up

-for Jussie Smollett!-(cheering, applause)

That wasn't too bad.