July 27, 2016 - Eliana Johnson

  • 07/27/2016

Donald Trump encourages Russia to spy on the U.S., and Larry discusses Bill Clinton's speech about Hillary at the DNC with Eliana Johnson, Mike Yard and Robin Thede.

Thank you very much.Thank you very much.

Oh, thank you very much.

Please, have a seat, please.

Thank you. So kind.Thank you so much.

Welcome to The Nightly Show.

They are correct,

I am Larry, Larry, LarryWilmore.

Hey, man, last nightHillary Clinton

became the firstfemale presidential nominee.

(cheering, applause)

Nominee.

And today, Donald Trumpachieved a first of his own

when, um, he took some timeout of his campaign

for, um, a little light treason.

Russia, if you're listening,

I hope you're able to find

the 30,000 e-mails

that are missing.

I think you will probably

be rewarded mightilyby our press.

Let's see if that happens.

No, let's not seeif that happens.

Oh, my God, you guys.

Did you hear that?

Trump literallyjust asked the Russians

to cyber-attackthe United States,

the country he wants to bein charge of protecting.

Seriously, is this finallygoing to be the thing

where we say"No, he's gone too far"

and send him home? Please?

(cheering, applause)

Maybe? Please.

Please, please, please.

Please let it be the thing.

Because, so far,none of these were the thing.

So, please...

let this be the thing.

Because I can't...Guys, I can't take this anymore.

I can't. It's true.

I had a full head of hairwhen this show started.

(cheering, applause)

True. It's crazy.

Oh, my God, that was...

not quite the hairdoI was expecting, you guys.

To have had.All right, moving on.

Let's see what's happeningwith The Unblackening.

(roaring)

(roaring)

Whew.(chuckles)

Yeah, boy-- day two of the DNC.

It was roll call,and history was made

when a major party formallynominated the first woman

to be presidentof the United States.

The first woman nomineein American history.

History will be made.

We're closer than ever

to putting a womanin the White House.

The very first woman president.

And I move that Hillary Clintonbe selected as the nominee

of the Democratic party

for presidentof the United States.

Hmm.

Didn't seem like he wasenjoying it, though.

Kind of like he wasforced to do it.

And guess what elseyou're gonna do?

You're gonna announce her.

You're gonna put herover the top, okay?

Let Bernie go homeand take a nap, you guys.

It's all right.But, man,

it was an exciting night.Let me tell you something--

it was a night so excitingfamed emoter Meryl Streep

couldn't not emote.

(whooping)

(cheering, applause)

(grunts)

Mm-hmm.

-Now...-(cheering, applause)

I'll tell you something.

Uh, a little fun fact-- I don'tthink a lot of people know this,

but Meryl's sucha great actress, she's actually

been at the convention all weekas one of the flags

on the back of the stage. Um...

Not making it up. True story.

Not making it up. But...

But the big story of the nightwas Bill Clinton,

and he had a very important job:convincing America

that his wifeis capable of hu-man emotions.

In the spring of 1971,

I met a girl.

Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill.

Focus on Hillary, Bill.

Don't get off on a tangent!No, no, no, no, no.

You'll never finish!You'll never finish!

Get back to... Sorry.(speaks indistinctly)

I get it, I get it, I get it.

You're telling usabout your attempt at romance.

I g... I got to be honestwith you guys though.

Some of the lines, they, eh...

it sounded a little stalk-y.

After the class,I followed her out,

intending to introduce myself.

I got close enoughto touch her back,

but I couldn't do it.

So I watched her...

Hmm...

Mm. All right,

so we know, uh, he becamepresident by defeating a Bush,

and now we know he met Hillaryby hiding in a bush.

Very good.

Very good, Mr. President.

Uh, did anybody else thinkthat was strange?

I think the beginningof the speech was

a-a controversial way to start.

I got to say, the-the st..top of the speech

I found shocking and weird.

(laughter)

Almost as shocking and weirdas still having to co-anchor

with Brian Williams,I would, uh...

I would imagine. What, too soon?Too soon about Brian Williams?

-What?-(cheering and applause)

Did I do that? Okay.

Anyway, so he took us throughhis relationship with Hillary

from the beginning,some of her accomplishments

we may not have known about,some personal anecdotes,

and then he starts to talkabout, like, what happened

in 1997.And that's close to '98.

(gasps)Oh, my God.

I know what happened in '98.

Is he gonna talk about the...Wha...?

1997 was the yearChelsea finished high school

and went to college.

(cheering and applause)

In 1999...

(stammering)No.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

What? What?

Fast-forward? No!

Pause! Pause!

Pause, rewind,play it back in slowmo!

You should talkabout that (bleep), man!

Was there any more human momentthan when you stepped out

on your ladyand everybody saw it?

Right. And we was like,"Oh, (bleep)!"

Right? And you were like,"I know, I know, I know."

Okay, obviously he's not goingto say that, right,

but rather than saying"Fast-forward,"

you know, he could have said,"And then I had one

"of my worst moments, bothas a president and as a husband.

"And without the strengthof my wife standing by my side,

"against all oddsand public opinion,

I would never be the man I amstanding in front of you today."

That's a (bleep) applause line,man.

-(cheering and applause)-(bleep) applause line.

How could you not say that?

You don't fast-forward

through some human (bleep)like that, man!

That's human stuffI'm talking about.

You got to own that, Bill.

Never gonna happen.

(chuckles) it wasan amazing night for America

and a historic one for women.

My daughters and allof our children are watching.

WOMAN: Tonight, a little girl is watching this moment.

If there are any little girlsout there

who stayed up late to watch,

let me just say,

I may becomethe first woman president,

but one of you is next.

That's right.It's impossible not to think

about the little girls watchingat home

and what it means to them.And we decided we had to hear

from one of them.So for more on this,

please welcome Camila Hernandez.

(cheering and applause)

Hey, uh,

welcome to the show,welcome to the show, Camila.

So, so, Hillary Clintonis the first woman ever

to run for president. Wow,you must be so excited, right?

Um, I mean, it's okay.

Um, personally,I'm a fiscal moderate,

-and she's a bit hawkishfor my taste. -Oh.

I mean, if I'm being honest,Hillary's pretty problematic.

Like, she comeswith all that '90s baggage,

plus voting for the Iraq Warthat birthed ISIS.

And, I mean, domestically,black people are still suffering

the tragic effectsof the crime policies

that her husband passedbut she supported.

If you read The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander,

you know exactlywhat I'm talking about.

Uh...

Yeah, I, um...

I did.

Um... I have to say,I wasn't expecting

such a nuanced perspective.

Oh, you know what,that's really interesting,

'cause I don't really, like,go in for identity politics.

-Oh. -But I do respectthe historicism

-of the moment, obviously,-Yeah.

because it's, like,I don't know,

even when it comes to Israel,

she spoke in March at AIPAC

-Yeah.-without a single mention

-of the Palestinians,-Right.

-which is, like,a huge blind spot. -Uh-huh.

But, you know, sure, whoo-whoo,female president.

(cheers and applause)

Okay.

Anyway, um, I have to gobecause my friend is having

-a My Little Ponybirthday party -Oh.

and they have a Slip 'N Slide,so, you know, priorities.

Oh, okay, well, uh, I-I guessCamila Hernandez, everybody.

Thanks, Camila.

We'll be right back.

(cheers and applause)

Welcome back.

Now, while the glass ceilingmay have been shattered

last night,hearts are still shattering

over Michelle Obama'sspeech from Monday.

I wake up every morning in ahouse that was built by slaves.

And I watch my daughters,

two beautiful, intelligent,

black young women,playing with their dogs

on the White House lawn.

(sniffling)

I'm not crying.

I'm just allergic.

Well, this speech wasn't just

a reflection of her timeas first lady.

It spoke to how farwe've come as a nation,

but Bill O'Reilly thoughthe should make a clarification

on a key racial issue.

Michelle Obama is essentiallycorrect in citing slaves

as builders of the White House,

but there were others workingas well.

Slaves that worked there werewell fed and had decent lodgings

provided by the government.

(sputters)

Wh...?

Your takeaway about slavery

is that they were well fed?

Ooh.

(in Southern accent):Thank you, Massa O'Reilly,

for-for-for clarifying meabout slavery.

-(applause, cheering)-I appreciate that.

Oh, oh, you know what, sir?

If'n I could read,I sure would wants to read

your book about killing Lincoln.

Course I ain't allowed to read,seeing as I'm a slave and all,

but sounds to me like he did

the wrong thingby freeing them slaves.

How you gonna free...

(laughing):how you gonna free people

with a full belly?

See, my slave bit is startingto wear off already.

Now, I don't know what's worse,that Bill O'Reilly Fox-splained

slavery or that people all overthe Internet needed him to.

For more, we turnto nightly show contributor

Franchesca Ramsey

with another installmentof #HashItOut.

(cheering and applause)

Thanks, Larry.

So, apparently, some peopleare upset that black people

are in the White Houseand that some black people

built the White House.

Check out some of these Tweets.

"Fact check: The White Housewas not built by slaves.

Only one third of the workerswere slaves."

Fact check: Putting "fact check"

in front of a bull(bleep) quote,doesn't make it a fact.

(whooping and applause)

And if only one-thirdof the workers were slaves,

that means the White Housewas built by slaves.

(cheers and applause)

That just means only two-thirdsof the workers

got to go home at night.

That's how fractions work.

But maybe you stopped payingattention to fractions

after the three-fifthscompromise.

(applause, cheering)

"Slaves didn't buildthe White House,

carpenters did."

This is going to blow your mind.

Some of the slaveswere also carpenters.

Just like Bill O'Reillycan be a TV personality

and a condescending asshole.

(cheers and applause)

"The White Housewas not built solely,

or even primarily by slaveswho were paid for work."

First of all,is that a Dr. Evil meme?

This meme is old enough to vote.

Not solely built by slaves?

Can please get out of here

with this #AllJobsMatter(bleep)?

But I get it.

You do these mental gymnastics

because it's uncomfortableto acknowledge this country

was built in part by slaves,

and that we benefitfrom their work.

But what else do you thinkthey were doing?

"We Shall Overcome" isn't a songabout how hard it is

to play the banjo.

And the worst part,

if you hadn't been so caught upon the word "slavery,"

you would have realizedthat Michelle Obama

was saying something positive.

Yes, the White Housewas built by slaves,

which is why it's sucha big deal

that we have a black president.

If you have a problem with this,

then I'm going to guess it onlyis because of who is saying it,

so let me try and put this intowords that you can understand.

(with accent):"I wake up every morning...

(cheers and applause)

...in a house thatwas built by slaves."

Is that better?

No, it's not better!

Franchesca Ramsey, everybody!

We'll be right back.

No! I don't want to hear that,Franchesca!

Okay, welcome back.I'm here with my panel.

First up, Nightly Show contributor Mike Yard.

(cheers and applause)

And Nightly Show contributorRobin Thede.

(cheers and applause)

And she's the Washington editor

for the National Review, Eliana Johnson.

(cheers and applause)

And for everyone at home, joinour conversation right now

on Twitter @nightlyshow usingthe hashtag #tonightly.

All right, so last nightthe DNC stepped it up

by bringing out Bill Clinton,"Bubba."

(panel laughing)

To hu-manize Hillary.

Speak about her character.

Kind of, uh,

reintroduce her to America--take a look.

In the spring of 1971,

I met a girl.

She had thick, blonde hair,big glasses.

Wore no makeup.

I loved that he picked that up."She wore no makeup."

(laughter)

Uh, was he successfulin reintroducing her?

I think he was trying tocommunicate that at one point,

these two people were attractedto each other.

-WILMORE: Right.-THEDE: Yeah. Yeah. -(laughter)

-Right.-But, um... -Yeah.

...he sort of lost me...

-Right. -...at "when Hillary'swater broke."

-I know. -Dot, dot, dot. I waslike done. -THEDE: You know,

-like, I thought there were somecute moments. -WILMORE: Yeah?

I thought... you know,I liked... I like the really...

when it wasn't about Bill's,you know, experience.

When it was more about somethingHillary did, like "When we took

"Chelsea to college andHillary was lining the drawers

and wouldn't leave."That was a really cute moment.

-Okay. -And it showed OCD,which I found adorable.

-WILMORE: Her OCD?!-(laughter)

YARD: But, you know, it's hardto reintroduce somebody that

never went anywhere.You know what I mean?

-WILMORE: Mm-hmm. -It's like,what are you telling? -Not true.

-Not true. Not true. They...-It's very hard.

That's likewhen Jay Z tried to...

WILMORE: You mean becauseshe hasn't gone away.

That's like whenJay Z trying to come,

like, after retirementfor two days.

-WILMORE: Yeah.-(laughter)

Talking about, "Allow meto reintroduce myself."

-My name is Hov."-Yeah. -(laughter)

-No, it's not. It's Jay Z.-Right. -We know you.

-We know you. -We know you.You're the same dude.

-Yeah.-Stop it! -Not fair.

Hov.

If you're already havingtrust issues

with the American people,

is Bill Clintonthe character witness?

-You know what I mean now?-(laughter)

-I mean, is he the...?-(cheers and applause)

Is he... I mean...

-Yeah. -WILMORE: I don't know.Maybe you should have

-one of the Trump kids come out.No. -THEDE: Yeah.

No, I-I guess...

Did he seem comfortableto you at all, or...?

Well, the thing withBill Clinton, I think, is that,

even if you hate him so much,you still sort of like him.

WILMORE:Mm-hmm. Yeah.

And Hillary hasthe opposite problem.

-It's like she...-(laughter)

Even the people she brought up

-who were supposedly speakingon her behalf, -WILMORE: Uh-huh.

...like Elizabeth Warrenand Bernie Sanders--

like, they sort of hate her.

-(laughter)-And everybody knows that.

-Right. -And that's reallyher main problem.

-Uh-huh.-Like, the American people

have sort of seen these flashesof the authentic Hillary

-over the years when she said...-WILMORE: Yeah.

"Oh, I could have stayed homeand baked cookies and had teas."

-WILMORE: Sure. -"But I waspracticing my profession

"before my husband wasand I'm not this woman

standing by my man like TammyWynette." -WILMORE: Yeah.

These are little flashesof the real Hillary,

and the American people justdon't really like her that much.

WILMORE:Well, all of her quotes...

-All of her quotes stick withher for like 1,000 years. -Yes.

-And Trump's don't last a day.-THEDE: Yes! Yes! -(laughter)

-YARD: Uh-huh. -You know?I don't understand that.

-(applause and cheering)-No, it's so true. -Right?

-JOHNSON: Well... -It's so true.That's exactly true.

-Right. Mm-hmm. -I think whatshe's facing, now, too,

is that, you got to remember...

The kids who are gettinginto the job world and who are

just now voting for the firsttime now were not alive...

WILMORE:Yeah. Don't remember that stuff.

...or they were barely bornwhen everything went down,

you know, in the '90swith the Clinton administration.

Mm-hmm. Everything went down.What happened?

-(laughter) -Everything...You know what went down.

-Fast forward.-Uh-huh. -But I think...

But I think... I thinkthey have an opportunity now

-to use this weekto reintroduce her. -Mm-hmm.

-I think Chelsea's gonna bea powerful... -Mm-hmm.

-...you know, advocatefor her this week. -Right.

And I thinkshe's gonna be a little more,

you know, genuine and warmthan-than...

What do you think is

the most important partof this reintroduction?

Do you thinkit's these personal stories

for us to get to know heras a human, or do you think

it's thingsthat she's accomplished

that we don't know about?

'Cause he brought up some thingsthat she had done.

-YARD: Yeah. -Or is itwhat happened in Benghazi?

YARD:I don't care about

you reintroducing meto Hillary Clinton

as a mother and this or that.

I would hopethat's what she's doing that

because that's what she is.

-WILMORE: Sure.-I care about policy.

I don't give a (bleep)if you like long walks

or you watch Police Academy movies.

-That (bleep)-- it doesn't meananything to me. -WILMORE: Yeah.

How are you goingto affect change in my life

in a positive direction?

That's what I care about.We get too caught up...

-(applause and cheering)-Yeah.

I feel like... we gettoo caught up in personality.

-WILMORE: Right. -The thingsthat I was most impressed about

last night was the stuffI didn't know about.

The Eagle Academy workthat she did.

That kind of stuff.The meeting with the mothers.

That kind of stuff.That's what I care about.

How are you gonna talk aboutpolicy that helps change...

-you know, people's situationand not... -Yeah.

I don't care what you do onyour off time. That's on you.

Well, it's funny,'cause I actually was impressed

by the thingsshe did in her off time,

where she had written lettersto, uh, this kid.

He grew up with dwarfism,and she met him as a kid,

and now he's an adult.But she used to send him letters

before his major surgeries--she didn't have to do that.

I mean, that kind of connectionwith somebody

is something morethan what a politician does.

-It does show some character...-But did she affect policy

that helped payfor that surgery?

-That is what I care about.-Yes, she did, actually.

Exactly. Tell me that.Don't tell me about letters.

She's been involvedin that sort of legislation

-her whole career, actually,you know. -Yeah.

-I mean, she has. -I thinkthat's what they need to push...

No, but that actuallyhas been her passion.

Well, unlike with Donald Trump,she found members

outside of her immediate familywilling to say nice things

about her, which I do think,you know, speaks volumes.

It's an important point. Okay,let me ask you this last thing.

-So...-(applause, whooping)

will the historical part--very good, that's so true--

but willthe historical implications

of Hillary'spossible presidency,

will that pull more people whoaren't necessarily Hillary fans

when push comes to shove?

Like, on voting day, you know,

people that aren'tnecessarily Democrats

or they don't knowwhere they stand,

will the historical partpull them in? Do you think?

Do you think that'll makea difference at the end?

I think there aretwo complications with that.

The first is, we've had thefirst black president already,

and the historical oppressionof African Americans

in the United Statesreally overshadows that.

-It's like, brothersjust got theirs. Right. -Yeah.

And the second is that HillaryClinton has positioned herself

as a feminist icon,but she's had to do

some remarkablyun-feminist things

to make herself a feminist icon.

She had to abideher husband's infidelities,

and also to tramplea lot of women,

um, particularly the onesher husband cheated on her with,

-Mm-hmm.-to get to where she is,

and that makes hera very fraught figure

on the first woman president.

I think that will be looked atfor a long time.

Although, that one,I don't know.

-I mean, if somebody's... -Yeah,you know how I feel about that.

-Oh, go ahead, Robin. -Listen,if somebody sleeps with my man,

I'm trampling over them, too.

-Right. -I mean, I knowthat's a ho right there.

-Yeah.-I don't care.

They want her to be superhuman,you know?

-They do!-It's kind of crazy.

Like, when you really think...'Cause I don't think

people think "woman"when they think Hillary Clinton,

I think theythink "Clinton" first,

-and then they think "woman."-I think you're right.

She has that Bill Clinton shadowthat's still over her, man.

-It's just, and it's hard.-Also...

I hope that...'cause I'm excited.

I mean, if she wins,I'll be excited.

-A woman president! In America!-Right.

-That's crazy! -Yeah.-(cheering, applause)

Too long. It's taken too long.

-It has taken too long.-I just... I just, you know,

I just hate the factthat we even still bring up

the infidelity--I wish we could ban it forever.

Or... or let'sfight fair with fair.

Trump cheated on his first wife.

Hillary didn't cheat,she just stayed with her man,

-and she gets (bleep) about it.-I agree.

-It's crazy to me.-I agree.

-It's crazy.-Okay. We'll be right back.

I agree. Robin, I agree!I agree!

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