Who Wants Cake?

  • Season 1, Ep 4
  • 04/28/1999

Will Jerri be loyal to her lockermate, or to play by school rules and rat her out?

I GUESS YOU HEARDMY AWFUL NEWS...

WHAT, ABOUT YOUBEING A SNITCH ?

NO, ABOUT CLAWSONBEING BOILED !

HEY, HOW DID YOU KNOWABOUT MY SNITCHING PROBLEM ?

I'M A DENTIST, JERRI.

PEOPLE TELL ME THINGS.

SO, WHAT ARE YOU GOINGTO DO ABOUT KIMBERLY ?

I'M GUESS I'MGOING TO TURN HER IN.

THEY BROKE ME, DOC.

MY FRIENDS, MY FAMILY,THE SCHOOL.

THEY CRACKED ME OPENLIKE A ROTTEN MOLAR.

WHAT HAVE IGOT TO LOSE ?

ONLY YOURINTEGRITY, JERRI.

LET ME TELL YOUA LITTLE STORY...

Y'KNOW, WHEN I WAS INHIGH SCHOOL, I HAD POLIO.

I BEGGED MY MOTHER NOT TO TELLANYONE, I WAS SO EMBARRASSED.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT ?

SHE DIDN'T.

NOT EVEN THE DOCTOR.

THAT'S WHY I HAVE TOWEAR THIS LEG BRACE

FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.

AND THIS BRACE SERVESAS A REMINDER OF THE POWER

OF LOYALTY IN AWORLD FULL OF BETRAYAL.

THAT'S A BEAUTIFUL STORYDOCTOR LINK.

I BET IF PRINCIPAL BLACKMANHEARD YOUR SPECIAL STORY

HE'S LET ME GO TOGOODTIME ISLAND.

WELL, THE FUN BUSLEAVES IN 15 MINUTES.

LET'S FORGET THE CRANKING.

WHY DON'T YOU GO ONDOWN TO SCHOOL

AND TELL THEMYOUR SPECIAL STORY.

BREAK A LEG, JERRI !

( yelling & cheering )

I'VE GOTSOMETHING TO SAY !

I'VE GOTSOMETHING TO SAY !!

NOW I DON'T WANT TORUIN Y'ALLS FUN

BECAUSE I KNOWMORALITY ISN'T SEXY.

BUT I WANT YOU ALL TO KNOWI CAN'T GO TO GOODTIME ISLAND

BECAUSE I WON'TTURN SNITCH.

ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, INTHE OLD DAYS I MIGHT HAVE.

BUT I'VE CHANGED.

PEOPLE CHANGE...

CHANGES.

I'M NOT THE SAME JERRI BLANK WHOINFORMED ON THOSE BLIND ORPHANS.

I'M NOT THE SAME JERRI BLANKWHO REVEALED THE HIDING PLACE

OF THOSE GUATEMALANS,SUCH AS YOURSELF.

AND I'M NOTTHE SAME JERRI BLANK

WHO TOOK A CRAP IN THEFLEISHMAN'S HOLLY BUSHES,LAST NIGHT.

I SHOULD BESITTING ON THIS BUS,

BUT INSTEAD,I'M GOING TO BE AT HOME

WITH MY DEAD LOBSTER...

AND THE KNOWLEDGETHAT I DID RIGHT.

THANK YOU.

THAT WAS A MOVING SPEECH, JERRI...

NOW GET OFF !!

WAIT !

CLEARLY, SHE'S RETARDED.

I MEAN IF SHE WASN'T

SHE WOULDN'T BE A SUSPECTIN THE FIRST PLACE !

PAYDIRT !

NOBLET, CART HER AWAY,NICE TRY YOUNG LADY.

I'M NOT RETARDED !NO... OH !

JERRI, TAKE HER PLACE.

WELL, WHAT AREYOU GOING TO DO

ONCE YOU GET TOGOODTIME ISLAND ?

I'M GONNA GET LAID !

"WHEN I STRADDLE AND SQUATTO SHOW YOU MY--"

( bell ringing )ALL RIGHT JERRI.

ALL RIGHT,EVERYBODY FOR TOMORROW

I WANT YOU TO WRITEA HISTORY POEM ON HIROSHIMA

BUT NOTHING TOO...FAG-GY...

AND REMEMBER,I NEED PERMISSION SLIPS

FOR THIS WEEK'S TRIPTO GOODTIME ISLAND.

WHERE'S YOURPERMISSION SLIP ?

SHUT YOURDIRTY LITTLE MOUTH !

JERRI ?

CAN YOU HOLD ON A MINUTE ?

SURE !

PRINCIPAL BLACKMANWANTED ME TO SPEAK TO YOU

ABOUTKIMBERLY TIMBERS.

MY LOCKERMATE ?

YES, WE'D LIKE YOUTO SPY ON HER.

SPY ON HER ?!

HEY !

I'M NO SQUEALER,ALRIGHT ?

I'M NOT SNARCINGON ANYBODY !

WHAT'D SHE DO ?

WE SUSPECT SHEMIGHT BE...

RETARDED.

WOW, WHAT MAKESYOU THINK THAT ?

WELL, LET'S JUST SAY IT'S ONE OFPRINCIPAL BLACKMAN'S HUNCHES

AND WE DON'TQUESTION THOSE.

DO WE ?

WELL, WHAT'S ITGOING TO BE, JERRI ?

I DON'T THINK SO.

I UNDERSTAND.

MMM...ALRIGHT.

OK.

OK.

IT IS A SHAMEYOU'RE GOING TO MISS

THE BIG SCHOOL TRIPTO GOODTIME ISLAND, THOUGH.

WHAT ?!

BUT I'M INTHE PLEASURE CLUB !

I MEAN...

MY DAD'S ALREADY SIGNED MYPERMISSION SLIP AND EVERYTHING !

SEE ?

JERRI, I'M AFRAIDI CAN'T READ THIS NOTE.

THE HANDWRITING IS SO...

UNCOOPERATIVE.

LISTEN JERRI, DON'TTHINK OF IT AS SNITCHING.

THINK OF IT ASBETRAYING THE RETARDED.

WE'RE NOT ASKING YOU TO DOANYTHING WE WOULDN'T DO.

THEN WHY DON'TYOU DO IT ?

THE BOARD OF EDUCATIONHAS VERY STRICT GUIDELINES

FOR SNARINGTHE RETARDED.

WE NEED CONFIRMATIONFROM ONE OF HER PEERS.

WHY ME ?

WELL, YOU GOTTHESE BRACES.

THEY TEND TOBE DRAWN TO...

SHINY OBJECTS.

RIGHT, WELL I DON'TTHINK SHE'S RETARDED.

REALLY JERRI ?

WHY DON'T YOUTAKE A CLOSER LOOK.

BUT BE CAREFUL.

IF SHE CATCHES ON,SHE MAY FLY INTO A RAGE

WHERE SHE WOULD HAVE THE STRENGTH OF AN APE,

AND NO REMORSE !

NOT EVEN A BULLETWOULD BRING HER DOWN.

WOW !

REMEMBER JERRI,GOODTIME ISLAND.

HI, JERRI.

HEY, KIMBERLY !

SO UM...HOW'S YOUR BRAIN ?

MY BRAIN ?

OH LISTEN,NEVER MIND.

SO YOU GOING TO AH...GOODTIME ISLAND ?

OF COURSE I'M GOING !

I'M SECRETARY OFTHE PLEASURE CLUB.

OH RIGHT !

SOMETIMES I CANBE SO RETARDED.

YOU KNOW WHATI'M TALKIN' ABOUT ?

YOU EVERFEEL THAT WAY ?

WHO DOESN'T ?

I DON'T.

DO YOU ?

I WAS JUSTJOKING, JERRI.

REALLY, "JOKING",THAT'S FUNNY.

DO YOU COME UPWITH THESE JOKESON THE SPOT

OFF THE TOPOF YOUR HEAD

OR WERE YOUBORN WITH THEM ?

I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

SHE DOESN'TUNDERSTAND !

WELL, SEE YALATER JERRI.

AT 12 NOON SHARP !

( boy )I HEARD IT WASSUPPOSED TO RAIN.

NOT ONGOODTIME ISLAND.

THEY'LL JUST PUT UP"THE PLEASURE DOME".

HEY, HAS ANYBODY HEARDFROM JERRI BLANK ?

NO...NO...NO...

THAT'S TOO BAD, SHEUSUALLY ENJOYS PLEASURE.

I SURE HOPESHE COMES.

( girl )WHAT ABOUTHER BRACES ?

THAT'S NO REASONTO TREAT HER DIFFERENTLY.

I ALMOST HAD TOGET BRACES, ONCE.

BUT AT THELAST MINUTE

THE DENTIST REALIZEDI HAD PERFECT TEETH.

NOW DO YOU ALLHAVE YOUR COSTUMES ?

I'M GONNA BEA JESTER !

I'M GOING TO DRIVEWITH MY EYES CLOSED !

I'M NOT GONNAWEAR ANY UNDERWEAR !

FUN !FUN !FUN !

( sigh )

OH, CLAWSON, I DON'TNEED GOODTIME ISLAND

AS LONG ASI HAVE YOU.

WELL, I HOPEYOU'RE HAPPY, JERRI.

YOU'VE SUCCEEDEDIN HURTING ME.

WHAT ARE YOUTALKING ABOUT ?

THANKS TO YOUR OBSTINANCE

YOUR FATHER AND I WON'T BE ABLETO GO TO GOODTIME ISLAND.

LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VEDONE TO YOUR FATHER.

I'M SORRY.

WELL... SORRY DOESN'TMAKE IT ANY BETTER, BUT...

SNITCHING DOES !

I THINK YOU OUGHT TOTURN IN THAT GIRL.

SHE'S THE ONLY ONEWHO'S BEEN NICE TO ME

SINCE I GOTTHESE BRACES.

AND BESIDES, YOU'RENOT MY REAL MOTHER !

NOW, DON'T YOURUN AWAY FROM ME, YOUNG LADY !

GET THAT--

STOP IT !

CUT IT OUT !

MOM !

CLAWSON !!

NOW LOOK WHATYOU'VE DONE !

AH, AH, ARGHH !

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