August 20, 2015 - Deez Nuts 2016 & Painted Ladies in NYC

  • 08/20/2015

Deez Nuts shakes up the 2016 presidential race, and Chris D'Elia, Hadiyah Robinson, Rory Albanese and Mike Yard dig into Larry's Bag o' Grabs.

♪♪>> Larry: THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

WELCOME TO "THE NIGHTLY SHOW."

THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

I APPRECIATE IT.

WE HAVE SUCH GREAT CROWDS, SOENERGETIC.

I REALLY APPRECIATE IT.

I'M LARRY WILMORE.

SO YOU'RE CORRECT.

AMAZING HOW YOU GOT THAT RIGHT.

IT'S TIME.

IT'S TIME TO FIND OUT WHAT'SHAPPENING WITH THE UNBLACKENING.

♪♪OKAY.

I JUST WANT TO DO A QUICKROUNDUP OF WHERE WE ARE WITH

THIS THING.

FIRST THINGS FIRST -- DONALDTRUMP IS ON THE COVER OF "TIME

MAGAZINE."

SO IF YOU'RE IN A DOCTOR'SWAITING ROOM IN THE 1980s, YOU

SHOULD PICK UP A COPY.

(LAUGHTER)MEANWHILE, HILLARY CLINTON LEADS

ON THE DEMOCRATIC SIDE, ANDHERE'S THE THING -- IN THE

LATEST CNN POLL, TRUMP IS ONLY 6PERCENTAGE POINTS BEHIND

CLINTON.

6 PERCENTAGE POINTS?!

(AUDIENCE REACTS)ARE YOU KIDDING?

THIS STARTED AS A JOKE, AND NOWIT'S A REAL THING.

(LAUGHTER)LIKE HANDLEBAR MUSTACHES AND

SAYING "TOTES."

THIS IS TOTES REAL, YOU GUYS.

DON'T WHATEVS IT.

(LAUGHTER)NOW, TRUMP HAS PROVIDED A LOT OF

ENTERTAINMENT, NOT ONLY FOR THESHOW, BUT EVERYWHERE.

BUT THERE IS A NEW CANDIDATECOMING ON THE SCENE WHO, BY HIS

NAME ALONE, MAY THREATEN THEEXCITEMENT THAT TRUMP HAS BEEN

GENERATING.

>> A JUST-COMPLETED POLL INNORTH CAROLINA SHOWS DONALD

TRUMP LEADING HILLARY CLINTON INA POSSIBLE PRESIDENTIAL MATCHUP,

BUT THAT'S NOT THE PART THAT'SGRABBING PEOPLE'S ATTENTION

TODAY.

IT IS THE THIRD-PARTY CANDIDATEON THAT POLL.

A CANDIDATE NAMED DEEZ NUTS.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Larry: I'M SORRY.

I'M NOT QUITE SURE I HEARD THATNAME RIGHT.

DID ANYONE ELSE REPORT ON THIS?

I JUST WANT TO BE SURE.

WE HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN SOME ROGUEREPORTER.

>> CANDIDATE NAMED DEEZ NUTS.

>> INDEPENDENT CANDIDATE.

>> DEEZ NUTS.

>> DEEZ NUTS FOR PRESIDENT.

>> DEEZ NUTS.

>> DEEZ NUTS.

>> DEEZ NUTS.

>> DEEZ NUTS.

>> DEEZ NUTS MIGHT BE OURSAVIOR.

>> DEEZ NUTS.

>> DEEZ NUTS, MR. NUTS.

>> Larry: MR. NUTS?!

(LAUGHTER)MR. NUTS IS MY FATHER'S NAME.

PLEASE.

CALL ME DEEZ.

ALL RIGHT, I BELIEVE YOU.

DEEZ NUTS IS OFFICIALLY IN THERACE.

OR SHOULD I SAY, DEEZ NUTS "ARE"OFFICIALLY IN THE RACE.

(LAUGHTER)SO, APPARENTLY, DEEZ NUTS IS

POLLING AT 8% IN MINNESOTA AND7% IN IOWA.

MEANWHILE, ACCORDING TO THE SAMEPOLLING COMPANY, LINDSEY GRAHAM

HAS "LITERALLY NO SUPPORTERS."

(LAUGHTER)(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Larry: OH, MY GOD!

LITERALLY NO SUPPORTERS!

I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT WAS ANUMBER!

GOOD GRIEF, LINDSEY.

AMERICAN TEENAGERS ARE HEADINGOVERSEAS TO JOIN I.S.I.S., AND

YOU DON'T HAVE A SINGLESUPPORTER.

(LAUGHTER)LET ME SEE IF I CAN EXPLAIN THIS

A LITTLE MORE CLEARLY.

THERE ARE TWO THINGS IN AMERICATHAT HAVE MORE SUPPORT THAN

LINDSEY GRAHAM -- I.S.I.S. ANDDEEZ NUTS!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Larry: YOU GOT IT.

THERE THERE!

OKAY!

TO GET MORE ON THIS, WE WANT TOGO TO DEEZ NUTS 2016 CAMPAIGN

HEADQUARTERS IN IOWA TO CHECK INWITH THE CAMPAIGN MANAGER.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Mike: THANKS, LARRY!

>> Larry: MIKE YARD?

YOU'RE THE DEEZ NUTS CAMPAIGNMANAGER?

>> Mike: YUP!

WHEN I HEARD ABOUT THIS STORYLAST NIGHT, I QUIT THE SHOW AND

FLEW OUT TO IOWA.

LARRY, SOMETIMES YOU JUST GOTTAFOLLOW YOUR HEART, MAN.

AND IN THIS CASE, I GOTTA FOLLOWDEEZ NUTS!

(LAUGHTER)(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Larry: WAIT, SO YOU'REWILLING TO THROW AWAY A CAREER

IN TELEVISION TO GO WORK ON APOLITICAL CAMPAIGN?

BECAUSE IT HAS A FUNNY NAME?

>> Mike: HELL, YEAH.

I'M EXCITED, LARRY!

THIS IS A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIMEOPPORTUNITY.

IF YOU LISTEN TO MY CANDIDATE'SSTANCE ON ENTITLEMENT REFORM,

HE...

I'M JUST KIDDING -- WE'RETALKING ABOUT DEEZ NUTS!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM A

PERSON RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT IN2016?

>> Larry: IDEAS FOR HOW TOMAKE AMERICA BETTER?

>> Mike: YOU SOUND LIKE MARTINO'MALLEY.

THAT DUDE'S POLLING AT 2%.

YOU KNOW WHY, LARRY?

NAME NON-RECOGNITION.

NOBODY CARES ABOUT ANYTHING HEHAS TO SAY BECAUSE HIS NAME IS

BORING.

WAKE ME UP WHEN YOU WANNA TALKABOUT DEEZ NUTS!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Ricky: LARRY, LARRY.

>> Larry: OH, YES.

LET'S GO TO RICKY VELEZ, WHO'SCOVERING THE SOCIAL MEDIA ANGLE

FROM "THE NIGHTLY SHOW" DATACENTER.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)HEY, RICKY!

>> Ricky: I'M HERE FOLLOWINGTHIS PHENOMENON, AND YOU SHOULD

SEE THESE, LARRY.

>> Larry: OH, THESE WHAT?

>> Ricky: DEEZ NUTS!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Larry: ALL RIGHT, FINE.

I GET IT.

I GET IT.

>> Ricky: THIS IS REALLYCATCHING ON, LARRY.

IT LOOKS LIKE EVERYONE'S PULLINGFOR...

DEEZ NUTS.

>> Larry: OKAY, I THINK YOU'REJUST HAVING FUN SAYING THIS.

>> Ricky: NO, I'M NOT, LARRY.

YOU KNOW I TAKE MY WORK VERYSERIOUSLY.

LET ME READ YOU THIS.

THIS REPORT SAYS DEEZ NUTS AREBLOWING UP ON TWITTER, DEEZ NUTS

ARE SHOWING UP ON INSTAGRAM, ANDDEEZ NUTS ARE SPREADING ALL OVER

YOUR FACE...

Facebook PAGE, LARRY!

>> Larry: OH, UH...

(LAUGHTER)ALL YOU'RE DOING IS MAKING A

JOKE OUT OF DEEZ NUTS.

>> Ricky: DEEZ WHAT?

>> Larry: DEEZ NUTS!

NOW YOU GOT ME SAYING IT!

YOU GOT ME.

YOU GOT ME.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Holly: LARRY, CAN I

INTERJECT HERE?

>> Larry: OH, YES, THANK YOU.

HOLLY WALKER, EVERYBODY, COMINGTO US FROM THE COUNCIL FOR

WOMEN'S VOTING.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)GO AHEAD, HOLLY.

>> Holly: LARRY, THIS IS THEMOST JUVENILE THING I'VE EVER

SEEN.

>> Larry: THANK YOU, YES!

I AGREE!

>> Holly: ONCE AGAIN, ALL OURPOLITICAL DISCOURSE IS DOMINATED

BY MALES AND THEIR LOCKER ROOMSENSIBILITIES.

WE'RE NOT HAVING A CONVERSATIONABOUT ISSUES THAT MATTER.

>> Larry: EXACTLY, HOLLY,THAT'S MY POINT.

THANK YOU.

>> Holly: UB WELCOME.

>> Larry: SO WHO'S THECANDIDATE YOU'RE MOST INTERESTED

IN TALKING ABOUT?

>> Holly: LARRY, THERE IS AVERY EXCITING DARK HORSE OUT OF

PENNSYLVANIA.

SHE'S A FEMALE CANDIDATE WHO HASA LOT TO SAY.

>> Larry: GREAT, WHAT'S HERNAME?

>> DEEZ TITTIES!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Larry: OKAY.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS, HOLLY.

NOW YOU'RE DOING IT, TOO?

>> Holly: NO, LARRY.

I'M COMPLETELY SERIOUS.

DEEZ TITTIES SPRANG OUTTANOWHERE.

(LAUGHTER)(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Larry: REALLY.

>> Holly: YES, LARRY.

THE CAMPAIGN WAS SAGGING, BUTNOW THEY'RE STARTING TO PICK UP,

AND THEY'RE GETTING A LOT OFSUPPORT.

HER POLL NUMBERS ARE LIFTING ANDSEPARATING THROUGH THE SWING

STATES.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Larry: THAT DOESN'T EVEN

MAKE SENSE!

MIKE YARD, WHAT ARE YOU DOINGTHERE?

I THOUGHT YOU WERE WORKING WITHDEEZ NUTS.

>> Mike: I WAS UNTIL I HEARDABOUT DEEZ TITTIES.

>> Holly: DEEZ NUTS!

>> Ricky: LARRY, I'M GETTINGINFORMATION THAT DEEZ NUTS AND

DEEZ TITTIES ARE JOINING FORCES.

>> Larry: I KNOW.

I'VE HEARD.

OKAY.

I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS.

MIC, HOLLY AND RICKY, EVERYBODY.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

♪♪>> Larry: WELCOME BACK.

I'M HERE WITH MY PANEL.

COMEDIAN AND "THE NIGHTLY SHOW"EXECUTIVE PRODUCER RORY

ALBANESE.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)VERY FUNNY COMEDIAN HADIYAH

ROBINSON.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)OUR OWN "THE NIGHTLY SHOW"

CONTRIBUTOR MIKE YARD.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)AND HIS SPECIAL INCURRIGABLE

CAN BE SEEN ON NETFLIX AND HE'SALSO THE STAR OF NBC'S UNDATABLE

CHRIS D'ELIA.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)SO TONIGHT WE'RE DOING SOMETHING

I CALL BAG O' GRAB.

I HAVE A BAG OF RANDOMCATEGORIES, SO WHEN IT'S YOUR

TURN, YOU WILL REACH IN AND GRABAN OBJECT.

THE OBJECT WILL REPRESENT THESUBJECT IN THE NEWS WE WANT TO

TALK ABOUT.

LADIES FIRST.

JUST PULL OUT AN OBJECT IN THEBAG.

THAT WILL TELL US WHICH OBJECT.

WHAT HAVE WE GOT?

>> TWO THINGS.

>> Larry: OKAY.>> IT'S A BRA GUN

THIS IS A -- THAT IS A GUN AND LINGERIE, AND THIS IS AN ARTICLE

ABOUT SEX AND VIOLENCE INADVERTISING.

I KNOW.

THIS IS SOMETHING YOU WOULD FINDIN THE SOUTH, I THINK.

JUST KIDDING, SOUTH!

CALM DOWN!

(LAUGHTER)>> THAT'S WHAT THE SECURITY TEAM

AT DEEZ TITTIES WEAR(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: APPARENTLY THERE'S A

NEW STUDY THAT SAYS SEX DOESN'TSELL AFTER ALL AND

ADS WITH SEXUAL OR VIOLENTCONTENT ACTUALLY DISTRACTED

VIEWERS.

THEY ENDED UP ONLY REMEMBERINGTHE SEX AND VIOLENCE -- AND NOT

THE PRODUCT THE AD WAS TRYING TOSELL.

>> I 'D BUY THAT.

MAYBE I'M JUST AN IDIOT.

I'M, LIKE, AWESOME. AND THEN I'MLIKE

HEY, WAIT, WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT?MAYBE IT'S JUST ME

>> Larry: YOU DON'T THINKABOUT THAT?

>> WHAT IS VIOLENCE USED TOSELL?

>> SOMEONE CUTS THEIR THROATAND THEY'RE LIKE GILLETTE!

BLEED OUT WITH GILLETTE, PEOPLE!

(LAUGHTER)>> MOST TO HAVE THE SEX

STUFF DOESN'T EVEN WORK.

THEY HAVE THE COMMERCIAL WITHTHE SEXY CHICK EATING THE

BURGER.

SHE PROBABLY DOESN'T EVEN EATTHAT BURGER!

SHE'S, LIKE, A HUNDRED POUNDS!

I'M NOT BUYING THAT BURGER!

(LAUGHTER)>> AND I NEVER WANT A BONER

WHILE I'M EATING A BURGER.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

I LIKE TO KEEP THOSE THINGSSEPARATE ANYWAY.

>> YOU'VE NEVER HAD A GOODBURGER

(LAUGHTER)>> I DON'T KNOW, I FEEL LIKE I'M

NOT REALLY PAYING ATTENTION TOTHAT.

I'M WATCHING THE SHOW.

I BUY WINE FOR EVERY EPISODEOF SCANDAL BECAUSE I KNOW

THEY'RE GONNA BANG AND INEED TO BE DRINKING WINE.

I'M THERE.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> GOT WATCH.

I JUST WANT TO HAVE WINE.

>> Larry: WHENEVER I SEEMONKEYS IN A COMMERCIAL, MY

BRAIN TURNS OFF.

THEY HAD THE MONKEYS IN THATOFFICE COMMERCIAL.

MONKEYS TURN OFF YOUR BRAIN.

SHOW THIS COMMERCIAL WITH THEMONKEYS.

THERE YOU GO.

♪♪THERE IS THE MONKEYS.

OKAY.

OKAY.

>> YES.

I WANT A BURGER.

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: I SAW THE COMMERCIAL

AND I'M, LIKE, THOSE MONKEYS AREHILARIOUS!

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THECOMMERCIALS ARE FOR.

>> WHAT IS IT FOR?

IT'S THE MONKEYS.

WHEN YOU SEE MONKEYS, YOUR BRAINTURNS OFF.

>> WHEN YOU SEE SOMETHING LIKETHAT, YOU WANT TO GET HIGH SO

YOU GET ON THE LEVEL THEY WEREWHEN THEY CREATED IT.

THAT'S A WII COMMERCIAL.

>> I BUY THAT.

>> Larry: THAT MAKES SENSE.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND THECOMMERCIALS WHERE THEY HAVE THE

WOMEN TURNED ON BY THE INANIMATEOBJECT OR ANIMAL.

LIKE THEY HAVE THE GEICO PIG.

AND HE SAYS, WELL...

WHAT, IS SHE GOING TO (BLEEP)THE PIG?

>> CAR INSURANCE IS PRETTY HIGHTHESE DAYS, MAYBE...

(LAUGHTER)>> I DON'T GOT TO DRIVE THAT

BAD.

>> Larry: TAKE THE BUS, THAT'SWHAT I'M SAYING.

>> I DON'T EVEN EAT PORK.

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: ALL RIGHT.

OOH!

>> Larry: BLACK AND WHITECOOKIE.

OKAY.

SO THERE'S A STORY ABOUT -->> BEFORE YOU EAT IT.

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: SO THERE IS THIS --

OKAY, REMEMBER THE STORY ABOUTRACHEL DOLEZAL WHO SAID SHE WAS

BLACK BUT SHE WAS WHITE?

THERE'S SUPPOSEDLY A BLACK LIVESMATTER MATTER ACTIVIST NAMED

SHAUN KING WAS ACCUSED THIS WEEKOF BEING WHITE AND TRYING TO

PASS AS BIRACIAL.

WE CALL THIS INCOGNEGRO.

>> WE DO.

IT SEEMS LIKE WE'RE OBSESSEDWITH WHITE

PEOPLE TRYING TO ACT BLACK. IFSOMEONE'S DOING GOOD THINGS

WHY DO WE CARE WHETHER THEY'REBLACK OR WHITE.

>> BRING MORE WHITE PEOPLE INTOTHE BLACK FOLD.

I'M TIRED OF BEING A MINORITY,Y'ALL.

>> YOU NEED TO COME UP, MAN.CHRIS WHAT ARE YOU DOING

>> TUESDAY, YOU WANNA BEBLACK? I'M ALREADY TRAINING

>> RORY.>> YEAH, HE IS.

I THINK IT'S WEIRD.

LIKE YOU SAID, IT'S SUCH A WEIRDTHING TO GO AFTER SOMEONE'S

BACKGROUND.

>> FEELS LIKE WE SHOULD USE OURINVESTIGATIVE JOURNALISM.

>> HE IS DOING SOMETHING GOOD.

YEAH, RIGHT.

WELL, I THINK PEOPLE WEREOFFENDED A WHITE GUY MIGHT WANT

TO HELP BLACK PEOPLE.

>> AND THEY'RE OFFENDED WHEN YOUDON'T!

>> I KNOW!

EXACTLY!

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

>> Larry: WELCOME BACK.

I'M HERE WITH MY PANEL, AND WEHAVE MORE ITEMS IN THE BAG O'

GRAB.

I THINK IT'S YOUR TURN.

>> GOING TO BE A COOKIE.

MINE WAS DELICIOUS.

>> OH, (BLEEP).

ALL RIGHT.

>> Larry: THIS LOOKS BIZARREBUT I TELL YOU WHAT IT IS.

SO A NEW JERSEY WOMAN -- OKAY,SO A NEW JERSEY WOMAN -- WE

CAN'T MAKE THIS (BLEEP) UP, YOUGUYS.

SHE DIED OF LUNG CANCER LASTWEEK AND ASKED IN HER OBITUARY

THAT IN LIEU OF FLOWERS THEPUBLIC NOT VOTE FOR HILLARY

CLINTON!

(AUDIENCE REACTS)>> THAT'S SO OUT OF CONTROL.

(BLEEP).

LITERALLY THE MOSTNEW JERSEY THING YOU CAN DO, YOU

KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

BECAUSE YOU SMOKE YOURSELF TODEATH AND ON YOUR WAY OUT

YOU'RE, LIKE, (BLEEP) HILLARY!

THE ONLY THING MORE JERSEY IS,LIKE, YOUR FUNERAL IS ON A JET

SKI.

OTHER THAN THAT, THAT'S ASHARD-CORE JERSEY AS IT GETS!

(LAUGHTER)>> THAT'S THE BEST TIME TO ASK

FOR SOMETHING, IF YOU THINKABOUT IT.

PEOPLE CAN'T SAY NO.

WHO'S GOING TO TELL SOMEBODY NOWHO'S DYING? NO, I AIN'T DOING

THAT.>> NOW JUST BECAUSE OF THIS

I'M GOING TO SEND HER A LOTOF FLOWERS.

(LAUGHTER)>> YOU CAN'T ASK SOMETHING LIKE

THAT.

LIKE, WHAT IF DONALD TRUMP GETSINTO OFFICE?

YOU HAVE TO BE HERE TO LIVETHROUGH A DONALD TRUMP

PRESIDENCY.

YOU CAN'T JUST DIE AND THEN SAYTHAT.

LIKE, FOR REAL!

(APPLAUSE)>> WE GOT TO TAKE IT YOU GOT TO

TAKE IT!

>> PULL HER OUT!

PULL HER UP!

(LAUGHTER)>> LOOK AT HIS HAIR!

>> Larry: THE WHOLEPRESIDENCY, LOOK WHAT HE'S

DOING!

>> SHE WAKES UP -- DID YOU VOTEFOR HER?

>> REANIMATE THE DEAD!

>> WHICH CANDIDATE HAS THEBEST CHANCE OF GETTING THE DEAD

VOTE?

>> A GOOD QUESTION.

>> Larry: HILLARY OBVIOUSLYCAN'T GET THE DEAD VOTE.

>> NOT NOW.

I FEEL LIKE BEN CARSON IS ABRAIN SURGEON.

HE DEFINITELY HAS A LABORATORY.

HE SAID IN THE DEBATE, TOO,BECAUSE HE CALLED THEM SIAMESE

TWINS BECAUSE THAT'S A TERM YOUSHOULDN'T SAY.

HE SAID, YEAH, I SEPARATED SOMESIAMESE TWINS.

THAT'S WEIRD.

I FEEL LIKE HE ALSO JOINED SOMEPEOPLE TOGETHER.

>> AND FIXED THE EYESIGHT OF ACOUPLE OF ORIENTALS, TOO.

>> I FEEL LIKE HE'S WORKING ON AHUMAN CENTIPEDE SOMEWHERE, YOU

KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

>> TO BE THE VICE PRESIDENT!

A HUMAN CENTIPEDE FORPRESIDENT!

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: THIS CONVERSATION

HAS DEVOLVED ABOUT 20 MINUTESAGO.

WHATEVER WE SAY, DON'T WORRYABOUT IT.

>> YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT DEEZNUTS!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> TOUCHY!

>> Larry: GO AHEAD, CHRIS.

OH!

>> Larry: THIS IS HAPPENINGHERE IN TIMES SQUARE.

NAKED PAINTED WOMEN AREMULTIPLYING RAPIDLY IN TIMES

SQUARE.

>> HUMAN CENTIPEDE WAS TOO MUCH!

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: THEY'RE PAINTING

THEMSELVES, I GUESS, SO THEY'REPAINTING THEIR BREASTS AND THEY

HAVE CLOTHES ON THE BOTTOM.

ANYBODY HAVE A PROBLEM WITHTHIS?

>> I DO BECAUSE IT'S DEFINITELYNOT OKAY FOR ME TO PAINT MY DICK

AND GO OUT AND TAKE PICTURESWITH PEOPLE.

>> I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITHIT NOT BEING OKAY FOR YOU TO

PAINT YOUR DICK.

(LAUGHTER)>> Larry: WHY ARE WE SO

OFFENDED BY BREASTS?

>> WHO'S "WE"?

(LAUGHTER)(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Larry: IT'S OKAY IF WOMENSHOW ALL THE BREAST BUT HAVE TO

COVER UP THE NIPPLES.

WHAT IS SO BAD ABOUT THENIPPLES!

I DON'T THINK ANYBODY'S OFFENDEDBY NIPPLES.

>> NIPPLES COME OUT, IT'S PARTYTIME.

>> TECHNICALLY.

>> Larry: OH, IT'S A SIGNAL!>> SIDE BOOB DOESN'T COUNT

YEAH, BECAUSE --THE NIPPLES IS WHERE GOD PUT

YOUR SOUL, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

SO YOU HAVE TO KEEP THEMCOVERED.

>> CHURCH...

PARTY TIME.

CHURCH...

PARTY TIME.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

>> Larry: I WANT TO KNOW WHOTHESE PEOPLE ARE WHO COMPLAIN

ABOUT TITTIES IN TIMES SQUARE.

>> HERE'S WHAT IT, IS TIMESSQUARE, NOW,, IS YOU KNOW, LIKE

THE OLIVE GARDEN AND AN M&MSTORE.

IT'S NOT LIKE A SMUT PLACEANYMORE.

YOU'RE IN FROM OHIO, TRYING TOEAT AT AN INTERESTING ITALIAN

RESTAURANT, OLIVE GARDEN, YOUKNOW WHAT I MEAN?

AND TRY TO GET A REAL NEW YORKEXPERIENCE, GO TO THE M&M STORE

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU SEEAMERICAN FLAG TITTIES AND YOUR

KIDS ARE, LIKE, MOMMY!

WHAT ARE THOSE!

THEN YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN IT.

IT'S NOT FAIR.

>> YOU KNOW WHAT'S MOREOFFENSIVE THAN THE TITTIES BEING

OUT AND PAINTED LIKE AN AMERICANFLAG IS THE FAT IRON MAN TRYING

>> TO TAKE PICTURES WITH YOU >> THAT'S WHAT I'M OFFENDED BY.

AND HE GOES TO LIFT OFF THESUIT, HE'S, LIKE, MR. IRON MAN,

YOU'RE TOO FAT!

>> Larry: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACKAFTER THIS.

(LAUGHTER)>> GRAB FREE TICKETS FOR AN

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