Wednesday, March 12, 2014

  • 03/12/2014

Jonah Ray, Wil Wheaton and Matt Mira list #FilthyCelebrities, watch public access TV stars and come up with bad podcasts before being joined by special guest Walton Goggins.

TODAY'S INTERNET HEADLINES,

RAPID REFRESH!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)A LOT OF PEOPLE CONFUSE THE

INTERNET AND THE WORLDWIDE WEB.

THE INTERNET IS THEINFRASTRUCTURE OF NETWORK

COMPUTERS THAT HOUSES THEWORLDWIDE WEB WHICH IS THE

RESOURCE LOCATOR.

THE INTERNET GOES BACK TO THELATE '60s, REALLY THE '50s

IF YOU WANT TO GET TECHNICAL.

HOW IS YOUR GIRLFRIEND ANDMODEL?

(LAUGHTER)WELL, ANYWAY, THE INVENTER OF

THE WORLDWIDE WEB, IT WAS HIS 25YEARS AGO ON THIS DAY, HE

PRESENTED THE IDEA FOR THEWORLDWIDE WEB.

WHAT WAS HIS ANSWER TO ANINTERVIEW TODAY HE WAS ASKED,

ABOUT THE MAIN USE OF THEINTERNET?

KITTENS, PORN?

YOU ALWAYS SEE PORN COMING BUTYOU NEVER SEE KITTENS COMING!

IF YOU WANTED TO SHARE A CAKEFART WITH SOMEBODY YOU HAD TO DO

IT IN PERSON.

>> GRAMMY WINNER MACKLEMORE, I LOVE HIM.

POSTED A NEW SONG ON INSTAGRAMTODAY, ALL ABOUT LIFTING THE

TOILET SEAT BEFORE YOU PEE.

GOT 124,000 LIKES IN THE FIRSTSEVEN HOURS.

THIS IS JUST GOOD INSTRUCTIONALMUSIC.

TAKE A LOOK.

(LAUGHTER)>> COMEDIANS, FOR 100 POINTS,

PLEASE NAME THIS SONG.

CRAPPERS DELIGHT.

>> YEAH!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)-- (BLEEP) -- -- (BLEEP) --.

IF YOU LISTEN TO THE ENTIRE CDTHERE'S A HIDDEN URINARY TRACT.

>> IN THE END IT'S NOT EVENORIGINAL IT'S A COVER BY R.KELLY

NOW TIME FOR TONIGHT'S HASH TAGWARS!

THIS DOESN'T SOUND LIKE A BUNCHOF LAWSUITS WAITING TO HAPPEN.

TINDER ANNOUNCED THAT THE APP ISGOING TO START A VERIFICATION

PROGRAM FOR CELEBRITIES SO THATTHEY CAN HAVE SEMIANONYMOUS

SEX IN BAR BATHROOMS.

STARS ARE JUST LIKE US!

THEY USE THE APPS TO GET TAIL.

IN HONOR OF THIS EXCITING NEWS,AND BECAUSE TODAY IS RON

JEREMY'S BIRTHDAY, TONIGHT'SHASHTAG IS...

GAME #1: #FILTHYCELEBRITIES#FILTHYCELEBRITIES

(EXAMPLES: BRYAN CRAM-SOME-IN,BJ NOVAK, CHRIS'S HARD

WICK)THERE'S NO --

(LAUGHTER)I'M PUTTING 60 SECONDS ON THE

CLOCK. STARTING NOW!

GONORRHEA PEARLMAN.

>>JULIA LOUIS DRYFISTLINDSEY LOHAN JOB.

DIARRHEA PERLMAN.

YES, CAPTAIN, FAIRLY LEGALMANILOW.

>> GEORGE POONEY.

WEIRD ANAL YANUKOVYCH.

BALLS GIAMATI

>> SACK BRAFF.

FISTER T.

ELLEN DEGENERES AMOUNT OFOIL.

>> YEAH, OIL WORKS.

IT WAS GOING TO BE ORAL BUT OILWORKS FINE.

STAIRWAY TO STARDOM!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> IF YOU ARE A NEW YORKER WHO

IS OVER THE AGE OF 30 YEARS OLD,STAIRWAY TO STARDOM WAS A

NEW YORK PUBLIC ACCESS SHOW INTHE '80s AND '90s THAT

STARRED SOME OF THE UP ANDCOMING ENTERTAINERS OF THE TIME.

THE SHOW CREATED A YOUTUBE PAGETO GIVE THEM INTERNET FAME.

FOR 250 POINTS, TELL ME WHATTHEY ENDED UP BECOMING.

THE FIRST ONE, THIS IS HORWITZINSPECTOR.

SONG SONG(MUSIC)

THE MOST SUSPECTED CASE OFMURDER SUICIDE IN THE HISTORY OF

MURDER SUICIDE(LAUGHTER)

>> IF YOU REMEMBER, GUYS, THEYALL WENT ON TO BECOME THE

WEIRDEST JUDGE IN THE HISTORY OFTHE U.S. LEGAL SYSTEM.

JUDGE JUDIES.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> MATT AND JONAH, I'M GOING TO

CONJOIN YOUR POINTS, 500 POINTS,WENT UP TWO DAYS, 250 POINTS

EACH.

ANTHONY CIOLA.

(MUSIC)THAT WAS THE ONE WHERE WESLEY

(MUSIC)THAT WAS THE ONE WHERE WESLEY

WENT ON STARSHIP MEETS.

>> OH!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)100 POINTS FOR STARSHIP MATES

AND THEN ALSO WHAT IS YOURANSWER TO THIS?

>> HE WENT ON TO BE SUPERMAN'SGREATEST FOE, THE KRYPTONITE

DANCE BELT.

BEFORE THE BREAK, I SHOWED YOUTHIS WONDERFUL PICTURE FROM

IMGUR OF A DOG WITH A HALLOWEENMASK ON AND I ASKED YOU TO

WRITE THIS DEVILISH CREATURE'SFIRST TWEET.

LET'S SEE WHAT YOU WROTE.

MATT MIRA.

>> WHAT GOD WOULD MAKE ME?

I AM TURNER.

I AM HOOCH.

(LAUGHTER)PLEASE KILL ME, #FML #UNBLESSED.

>> DEAR @DEMONSPAWNMOM SORRY IWRECKED YOUR VAGINA.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> I HAVE MY MOM'S EYES AND MY

DAD'S LIPSTICK.

IT'S TIME FOR FAILED PODCASTS!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)I'M A LITTLE CONCERNED ABOUT

THIS ONE.

(LAUGHTER)PODCASTS ARE GREAT, CHANGED THE

FACE OF MEDIA AND HELPED A LOTOF US GET OUR CAREERS BACK ON

TRACK.

SO WHAT I WOULD LIKE YOU GUYS TODO IS I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU 60

SECONDS ON THE CLOCK.

I WANT YOU TO BUZZ IN WITH MANYPODCASTS YOU WOULD NEVER WANT TO

LISTEN TO.

GO.

JONAH.

>> JONAH RADIO.

HEY!

>> WILL.

JONAH RODEO.

WHATEVER.

WHATEVER.

JONAH RADIO.

YES, MATT.

>> PANTS MARCHING.

IT'S A FASHION PODCAST WITH ADAVE MATTHEWS TWIST.

>> OH, OH!

MAN!

WILL.

>> THE FLIRTIST WITH PETERHARDWICK.

THE NERDIST HOSTED BY SHIALEBOUF

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