In this episode, Microsoft hires someone to tamper with Wikipedia. Back off Gates, that's my job. And Scientologists name their new messiah -- you must be OT level five to watch the rest of the show. Plus, author Barry Lando blames the trouble in Iraq on Western leaders dating back to 1914. Finally, we can pin those missing WMDs on Woodrow Wilson. A.E.I.O.U. and sometimes Y? Consonant or vowel -- make up your mind -- we're at war. This is The Colbert Report.