Hardwick, Conroy, Leslie, Van Deventer

  • Season 5, Ep 510
  • 11/30/2001

Chris Hardwick's dad was a pro bowler, Sean Conroy models for his dermatologist, Leslie Jones breaks down her posse, and Charles Van Deventer likes corporate coffee shops.

LOOK AT THAT.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

AH.

GOSH.

ISN'T THAT GREAT?

YOU'RE NEVER AS ENTHUSIASTIC AS

YOU ARE WHEN YOU'RE IN COLLEGE.

YOU KNOW?

"WHAT DORM DO YOU LIVE IN?"

"YEAH!

YEAH!

YEAH!"

"WHAT'S YOUR MAJOR?"

"PSYCHOLOGY!

OH, MY GOD!"

YOU JUST HAPPY.

YOU KNOW, YOU NEVER SEE

MIDDLE-AGED PEOPLE LIKE,

"I'M GETTING A DIVORCE!

YEAH!"

"I LOST MY JOB.

YEAH!"

AH...

ENJOY THE GOOD TIMES, KIDS.

'CAUSE IN ABOUT EIGHTEEN MONTHS,

IT'S TIME FOR THE REAL WORLD.

NICE.

OKAY.

BOWLER.

THAT'S NOT FUNNY.

THAT'S NOT COOL.

AS A MATTER OF FACT, HE WAS

ONE OF THE GREATEST PROFESSIONAL

BOWLERS THAT EVER LIVED.

SO, NATURALLY, I'M GOOD.

I'M A GOOD BOWLER.

I CAN'T HELP IT.

I'M AWESOME AT BOWLING.

I'M SORRY.

SEVERAL THINGS HAPPEN WHEN

YOU GROW UP IN A BOWLING CENTER.

YOU GET GOOD A BOWLING AND

FROGGER AND LIKE, MEETING

DIVORCEE'S.

IT HAPPENS.

SO THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS.

SO, IT WAS A TREMENDOUS MISTAKE

FOR ME, A COUPLE MONTHS AGO,

TO TAKE A FIRST DATE BOWLING.

SO...

SO WE WENT...

AND, YOU KNOW, IT WAS THREE

OR FOUR FRAMES INTO IT SHE GOES,

"YOU JUST TOOK ME"--

BY THE WAY, THAT'S NOT HOW SHE

TALKED, BUT THAT'S HOW I HEARD

HER.

SHE GOES, "YOU JUST TOOK ME

BOWLING TO IMPRESS ME."

"WELL, YES."

(LAUGHTER)

"ANOTHER STRIKE FOR ME.

ARE YOU READY FOR MY SEED YET?

OR SHOULD I MOVE ON TO

JUG A LEG?"

(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)