Stop! Pajama Time

  • 10/25/2011

When Jillian gets put in charge at work, all hell breaks loose.

- ALICE, FEEL BETTER.

TAKE IT SLEAZY.

- [coughs]

- THAT'S THE THING I'M SAYINGNOW--TAKE IT SLEAZY.

- I LIKE IT, YEAH.

- AS YOUR NEWLY APPOINTEDLEADER, OUR FIRST ORDER--

WAIT GUYS, DON'T LEAVE YET.

NO. WAIT, WE HAVEN'T FIGUREDOUT THE PAJAMA THING.

WAYMOND, YOU STAY RIGHT THERE.

GET THAT--NO.

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.

- THAT'S A HAT.

- HEY, GUYS, DO YOU MINDGETTING BACK TO YOUR DESK

AND MAKE ITA SUCCESSFUL WORK DAY?

- OOH!

- ONE MORE TOSS AND THAT'S IT.

OKAY, MAYBE NOT A BEER,MAYBE PAPER WORK.

HEY, JET, OH.

UH, SO I WAS THINKING MAYBE WESHOULD DO THE GROUP PHOTO SOON.

- SUCK MY [bleep].

BE GONE.

- HEY, BLAKE, BE HONEST.

WHAT IS IT ABOUT METHAT NO ONE RESPECTS?

IS IT MY HAIR?

YEAH. I'M THINKING ABOUTGETTING A NEW HAIRCUT,

CHANGING STUFF UP.

MAYBE GETTING LIKE AN...ARNIE SCHWARZENEGGER,

JINGLE ALL THE WAYTYPE OF HAIRCUT?

YOU KNOW, SHORT,TALL AND STIFF.

KIND OF LIKE HOW I LIKE MY MEN.[laughs]

WHAT OF WE DO LIKEA LITTLE SCRIMMAGE?

ADAM, YOU BE THE FIREE...

- THAT DOESN'T MAKE MUCH SENSE,KINDA THE TOP GUN.

- AND I WILL BETHE FIRER, OKAY.

AND NO MATTER WHAT THIS GUY SAYSOR THROWS MY WAY, YOU KNOW,

I'LL JUST POWER THROUGHAND I'LL FIRE THE GUY, OKAY?

IT'S REAL EASY.ARE YOU READY?

- I'M READY.- OKAY. LET'S GET TO IT.

ADAM, I'M SORRY TO SAY THIS,BUT WE GOT TO LET YOU GO, BUD.

- YOU'RE FIRING ME?

I WORK HERE FOR 60 YEARSBUILDING THIS COMPANY

FROM THE GROUND UP,AND YOU FIRING ME?

- SORRY, DUDE.

- I AIN'T GOING OUTLIKE NO BITCH, YOU BITCH.

- ANDERS, YOU HEARD ANYTHING?

I CAN'T LOSE MY JOB,YOU UNDERSTAND?

I AIN'T GOING BACKTO SUBSTITUTE TEACHING.

- MONTEZ, MY EYESARE BURNING RIGHT NOW.

COME ON.

- YOU KIDS GOT NO SHAME,NO DECENCY.

THANKS FOR THIS APRON, MAN.

- YOU GOT A .44 MAGNUMPOINTED AT YOUR HEAD.

WHAT THE [bleep]ARE YOU DOING?

YOU FIRE ME, I'LL KILL YOUAND EVERYBODY IN HERE.

- OH, DO WHAT HE SAYS, BLAKE.

- YOU REALLY THINKI'M THAT STUPID?

- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

- CHECK THE GUN, HOTSHOT.

- VERY CLEVER.

VERY CLEVER.

YOU TAKE THE BULLETSOUT OF MY GUN.

- YEAH.

- BUT LET'S SEE IF YOU CANTAKE THE BULLETS

OUT OF THIS BUTTERFLY KNIFE.

- JILLIAN, GO AHEAD AND GIVETHIS GUY A CIGARETTE,

'CAUSE I'M ABOUTTO LIGHT HIM UP.

- ARE THOSE SUNGLASSES?

- YEAH, SUNGLASSES.- COOL.

- FOR MY FLAMETHROWER.

- NO, NO.

- YOU'RE FIRED.- NO!

- YOU'RE SO FIRED.

- [screaming]

- OOH! OOH! OOH!

- [still screaming]

- AND HE'S FIRED.

- AND I'M FIRED.- AND HE'S FIRED.

- THAT WAS VERY INFORMATIVE.- THANK YOU.

ALL THE NAMES CAME IN.

- OH, HERE WE GO, BABY.

WHO'S GETTIN' CHOPPED?

JILLIAN-STYLE.

- OKAY. CLINT.

- UH-HMM, YES.- YEAH.

- GARTH.- THAT MAKES SENSE.

- LOIS.

- OH, THE BIG STINK.

- OH.

- AND ADAM.- HMM?

- WHO?

- DEMAMP. OH.

- I'M--I'M CONFUSED.

- WAIT, I'M FIRED?

- NO.

- GOOD.

- YOU'RE GOING TO BE FIRED.

- [bleep]

- [bleep]

ME!

JILLIAN, HOW MANY TIMESHAVE I SAVED YOUR LIFE, HMM?

- I DON'T KNOW...SIX?

- NEVER!

AND IN NEVER WILL NOW BECAUSEI THOUGHT WE WERE WORK FRIENDS

AND THEN YOU FIRE ME.

AND THEN YOU FIRE MELIKE A COLD-BLOODED ROBOT.

YOU'RE LIKE,"YEAH, YOU'RE FIRED!"

- I WAS JUST DOINGWHAT YOU TOLD ME TO DO.

- [fake laughs]

SINCE WHEN HAVEYOU LISTENED TO ME?

I JUST TALK.

I JUST TALKTO HEAR MYSELF THINK.

NOBODY ACTUALLY LISTENS TO ME.

HEY, YOU KNOW,I'M JUST HERE TALKING AND--

WHY THE [bleep] ARE THERENO REESE'S PIECES?

- OKAY, ADAM...

- YOU SUCK REESE'S PIECES.

- HEY, YOU ARE STRESS-EATING.

GIMME THE CHIPS.

PLAIN POTATO CHIPS, REALLY?

YOU CAN HAVE ONE MORE.

NOW WERE CLOSING THIS.

UNREAL.

COME ON.

I'M SURE THIS IS ALLJUST A BIG MISTAKE.

LET'S JUST RELAX.

LET'S CALM OUR JETS.

- MY JETS ARE CALM.

BESIDES, ALICE IS THE ONLY ONETHAT CAN FIRE ME.

SO I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE

UNTIL I HEAR IT COMEFROM HER SWEET, PURSED LIPS.

- OKAY.

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I DIDN'TWANT TO HAPPEN.

- UH... OH, YES.

GREAT.

OH, GOT IT.

- [coughing]

- WHO'S THERE?

HELLO.

IS SOMEONE THERE?

LISTEN, I'M ARMED AND I'VE GOTAIDS, SO IT'S NOT WORTH IT.

- WHAT?

OKAY, WHAT THE HELLIS GOING ON HERE?

- OH, ALLISON.

HEY, LISTEN,THESE--THESE ONESIES.

THEY'RE MAKING ME BREAK OUT.

I CAN'T REALLY SEE ANYTHING.

I GOT TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL.

- SEE, I JUST GOT A CALLFROM MONTEZ.

SAYS THAT JILLIAN IS GOINGAROUND FIRING PEOPLE.

- WELL, YEAH. SHE IS.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

RUDY SAYS, "WHEN YOU LEAVETHE THIRD STRING KICKER

IN THE QUARTERBACK'S POSITION,SOMEONE'S GONNA GET SACKED."

- OKAY. JUST SHUT UPAND FOLLOW ME.

I WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON.

- OKAY. WOULD YOU TAKEMY HAND ACTUALLY?

- HEY, ALICE, HOLD UP.

- WHAT?

- ONE THING RIGHT QUICK.

- WHAT'S UP?

- ADAM, GET DOWN FROM THERERIGHT NOW.

- I DON'T HAVE TO LISTENTO ANYTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY

FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE,

WHICH IS ABOUT TO ENDBECAUSE YOU FIRED ME, ALICE.

SO HEAR ME, WORLD, 'CAUSETHESE ARE MY LAST WORDS.

IF YOU TAKE ANYTHING FROM ADAM"THE TOP GUN" DEMAMP'S LIFE,

TAKE THIS.

TAKE IT SLEAZY.

AND I'M OUT.

WRITE THAT DOWN.

"TAKE IT SLEAZY AND I'M OUT"ARE MY LAST WORDS.

AND I'M KILLING MYSELF.

- WHAT THE HELL DOESANY OF THAT EVEN MEAN?

- TAKE IT SLEAZY!

- [thuds]

- OH, NO!

OH, ADAM! OH, NO!

WHY WOULD HE--THIS IS YOUR FAULT!

YOU SHOULD'VE PUT ME IN CHARGE.

- HEY. IT'S A DUMMY,YOU BLIND IDIOT.

- WAIT, WHAT?

both: WHAT YOU HAVE SEEN HEREWAS NOT REAL.

THIS WAS A DEMONSTRATION OF WHATSTRANGE TURNS LIFE CAN TAKE

WHEN THE POWERS THAT BE MAKEDUMB DECISIONS...

- ...STUPID

DECISIONS.DUMB DECISION?

- STUPID DECISIONS.- STUPID DECISIONS.

both: SO PUT YOUR FEARS ASIDE,FOR ADAM IS ALIVE.

- HEY.

Loading...