In this episode, the United Arab Emirates wants to control our port. I'll tell you why there should be no U.A.E. in U.S.A -- well there's a U and an A, but the E -- moving on, moving on. Then, should gay adoption be banned or just made very unfashionable? Plus, I'll ask University of Pennsylvania's Michael Eric Dyson what caused the Katrina debacle: incompetence, prejudice or all that rain? It's George Washington's birthday, and I cannot tell a lie: the previous statement was false. This is The Colbert Report.