Rapper 2 Chainz gives insight into Ben Carson's campaign suspension, and Larry discusses "Ghostbusters" backlash with Cedric the Entertainer, Robin Thede and Rory Albanese.
Yes! Yes, man!
Thank you very much!
Welcome to The Nightly Show!
-Man! What a great crowd today.-(audience chanting "Larry!")
Thank you. I appreciate it.
I appreciate it.Uh, you guys,
you got to get together on thatthough.
'Cause he was like, "Lar-ry!"
He was like,"Yo, man, it's 'Larry!'"
Happy International Women's Dayout there to everybody,
I just want to say. HappyInternational Women's Day.
Very cool.Um, and also, you know,
this is one of those days...I don't know how to start...
You know, I'll tell you what,I just want to take a moment
to acknowledge, um, a lossin the comedy community.
And, um,I know this happened last week,
but it's-it's just taken mea few days to process.
REPORTER: Retired neurosurgeon Ben Carson has pulled out
of the Republican race. Carson announced
that he was suspending his campaign
at a gathering in Maryland on Friday.
That's right, you guys.
Black Droopy the Doghas officially put his campaign
(as Droopy): "Would you believeI'm suspending my campaign?
"I wanted to bethe real black president.
-(applause) -And, uh...Thank you very much. Thank you.
And although we'll mournhis sleepy, stabby tirades,
uh, Ben Carson may notbe gone forever, you guys.
Technically, he didn't quit--he suspended his campaign.
I mean, maybe he'll takeanother stab at it
as Kanye's running mate in 2020,you know?
Ben-ye 2020, y'all.
That's all I'm sayin'.That's all I'm sayin'.
But you know what, here's thething, it also made me think,
why do candidates suspendtheir campaigns
instead of just quitting,anyway?
I'll tell you what,to break it down and give us
his expert analysis, here'srapper 2 Chainz in a segment
we call 2 Chainz Explainz.
WOMAN:♪ 2 Chainz Explainz
(cheering and applause)
Hi. I'm 2 Chainz.
And suspending your campaignis all about the money, Larry.
See, if you suspendyour campaign instead of quit,
you can still raise moneyfrom suckers that don't know
you dropped out the game.
Then the federal governmentwill give you matching dollars
for those same funds.So you can stack your money,
stack your money, and stack yourmoney until you need a ladder,
and then your campaignis out of debt.
See, as of last month, WisconsinGovernor Scott Walker's campaign
still owed vendors $1.2 million.
That's half the costof my chains, man.
You know how I go.
"All my broads is foreign.
All my money tall like Jordan."
You kind of get where I'm goingwith this stuff, right?
This has been 2 Chainz Explainz,you guys.
WOMAN:♪ 2 Chainz Explainz
Make sure to pick up 2 Chainz'snew album ColleGrove
with Lil Wayne, available now wherever records are sold.
I'm assuming online somewhere.
Okay, now on to our top story.
Uh, by the way, guys,Hillary Clinton gave a speech
after her win on Saturday,and there was a curious response
to it. Okay, here's the speech.
We need to bring more peopleinto our party,
keep the enthusiasmof young voters,
develop a pipelinefor new leaders.
Sounds pretty normal, right?
Okay, here's the analysis.
REPORTER: Chris, you know, one of the trickier things
to teach, uh, people about public speaking
is that the microphone works.
-You don't have to actually yell. -(laughs)
Yell? I mean, they're talkingto Hillary like she's an idiot.
You know? "Uh, me no understandmagic talking stick.
"What me do in talking stick?
"Me scream loud. Aah, aah, aah.
Me smash glass ceiling."
I don't understand.
What are they telling her?!
Not to mention, it's just three men talking about this.
I mean, aren't you guys being a wee bit patronizing?
It's got nothing to do withgender because the technique...
It's technique, damn it. It'snot personality or character.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no,Chris Matthews. No, no, no, no,
no, no, no. You of all peopledo not get to be part
of a conversationcriticizing someone
yelling into a microphone.
Don't come out here and pretendyou care about old people!
You're wrong, wrong, wrong!
You can call for revolution,but it ain't gonna happen.
Where is this guy?
We have our knives out!
Hey, Chris Matthews!Your microphone works!
(cheering and applause)
All right. Okay.But I understand why
maybe they're being a littleharsh on Hillary, because,
you know, none of the candidates
who are dangling Dare being loud at all, right?
Do you swearthat you're going to vote
for Donald Trump tomorrow?!
They are gettinga one-way ticket to Guantanamo
and we're gonna find outeverything they know!
And the alphabet soupof government agencies
that strangles small businesses!
And we will unleashbooming economic growth!
Mmm. Man voices sound good.Yeah.
There's just somethingpresidential
when a man yellinto a microphone.
and, guys, it's not just...it's not just the media
that's trying to shush Hillary.
If you are talkingabout the Wall Street bailout,
where some of your friendsdestroyed this economy...
-You know... -through...Excuse me, I'm talking.
-Let him respond.-(gasping, applause)
Apparently Bernie's socialismdoesn't include
sharing the conversation.
All right! Okay!
Sorry for the burn, Bernie,but in all fairness...
Well, look, guys,in all fairness,
they're at least havinga heated debate.
I mean, Chris Matthews,I'll tell you what, show Bernie
how a real condescendinginterruption works.
There's gonna be a Congresssitting with you
you got to do business with,no matter who gets elected.
-Well, and, also,-Revolution sounds like a pass.
-very importantly. Well... -Likea... You don't have to worry
about logic anymore. Just,"I'm gonna have a revolution
and pay for everything."
Oh, my God,you are such an asshole!
I have a lot to say about this,but, you know what, guys,
I'm gonna cede the floorto my esteemed Nightly Show
colleagues who know a lot moreabout being shushed
and interrupted than I do.So please welcome Holly Walker,
Robin Thede, Franchesca Ramsey,and Grace Parra!
(cheering and applause)
Look, guys,just a simple message
we want to give you--quit interrupting us.
Now, we knowsometimes it's confusing
because we're good listeners.
But sometimes we're onlypretending to be good listeners
because we're pissedabout being interrupted.
Ever had a great ideayou couldn't say
because colleagues wouldn't letyou get a word in edgewise?
Ever been on a datewhere he monologues
for three straight hours?
-Yup! -Yup! -Yup!
My last date never even knewI was funny.
He interrupted meevery time I tried to speak.
Yeah, I'm talking to you, Mark.
ALL:(bleep) you, Mark.
(applause and cheering)
It's not that we don't thinkyour ideas are good.
-They're objectively not good.-Just like ours.
Point is, everyone deserves tosay their (bleep) ideas out loud
without getting shushed.
True equality is whenevery man and woman...
Indeed, everyoneon the gender spectrum...
Can get their thought out...
ALL:Then be judged as an idiot.
-(applause and cheering)-Mm-hmm. -Mm-hmm. -Yes. Yes.
And look, we know it's hard.
It's hard to let a woman talkwhen you're dying to chime in.
But this is how you do it.
Uh, you were talking.Please continue.
Then you shutyour (bleep) mouth.
(applause and cheering)
You get a lot of t...
And the woman finishes the pointshe was...
Oh, I'm sorry, Holly.I interrupted you.
Oh, thanks, Grace.
You see, Larry,when you interrupt someone,
you're telling them whatthey're saying doesn't matter.
-And if you think...-WILMORE: No, no, that... I...
I'm not saying what you'resaying doesn't matter. I'm...
-(audience booing and groaning)-Oh.
-Mm-hmm.-I just did it, didn't I?
-Oh, man, I get it now. I'm...-Ah.
See? Now,what are you supposed to do?
Shut my (bleep) mouthand listen?
WOMEN:We'll be right back!
(cheers and applause)
Now, as Donald Trump continues
to surgethrough this primary season,
GOP rhetoric has fallen,well, below the belt.
WOMAN: Trump, Rubio and Cruz trading jabs.
Mitt Romney eviscerated Trump,calling him a bully,
calling him a phony,calling him a fraud.
Rubio fighting backat the Donald,
and, in a sense,stooping to his level.
Stooped to Trump's level.
Stooped to this level.
Stooping to, you know,
a lower level.
Republican trash talkhas gone viral,
much like an STDat one of Trump's many hotels.
Our gonorrhea is luxurious!
Now, I get that petty dialogueis disappointing
for the party of Lincoln, butis there any way to fight Trump
without resort to insults?
All right, to find out,let's go straight to the source.
Uh, ladies and gentlemen,please welcome Donald Trump.
(applause, cheeringand whistling)
-Donald.-Thank you, Larry.
Thank you,but no tough questions, okay?
I only have a few minutes
before I do intercoursewith Melania, okay?
Um, okay, um, uh, okay, Donald,
are you intentionallytrying to get candidates
to stoopto your level of rhetoric?
What level? What level?The winning level?
Marco Rubio, Ted Cruz--
they can't matchmy rhetoric, okay?
It's not their fault, okay?
We all knowhow Hispanics are with English.
(audience booing and groaning)
-Okay, see? -A disaster.A complete disaster.
Yeah, now, see,that's offensive.
You know, I'm notgonna go there then.
I'm not gonna go there.
But what about your insultstowards former candidates
like Mitt Romneyand John McCain?
You mean, uh, loserand war loser, okay?
They lost to Obama,almost as badly
as your show is losingto Jimmy Fallon at 11:30.
-I mean, come on. -Oh, wait.Hold on! -(audience groaning)
-That's not fair! No, no, no.-I'm telling the truth.
Fallon's on network,and we're...
-Ah, see? We... You... It's...-(laughter)
You're tryingto get me to stoop, aren't you?
See? Yeah. Uh-uh.
I see what you're doing there,Donald.
Oh, see what, Larry? See what?See what? Your glasses?
I mean, come on.By the way, they're thick.
-They're unbelievably thick.-(laughter)
I mean, can you really seethrough those?
-That's what I'm wondering.Really. -Oh, yeah.
-(laughter)-Yeah. Glasses burn?
Yeah. Yeah, that hurtmy feelings, yeah.
Nice try. I'm not gonna takeany cheap shots against you.
-I'm not gonna do it. -Oh, well,of course, you're not.
You know why?Because you're a black.
And the blacks-- they love me.They do.
They really do.They're an amazing people.
(laughter and groaning)
Okay, fine.The blacks, huh? Mm-hmm.
Come on, man.You know that's pretty racist.
Racist? I'm not racist, okay?
Come on. If I were racist,I'd say the "N" word, okay,
which, by the way,that is a disgusting word.
It is. I hardly ever use it.
Okay, will not stoop.
Will not matchyour level of bullying.
You're not goingto match me, okay?
First of all, like howyou're never gonna feel the love
that Stephen Colbert feltfrom his fans.
-(audience groaning)-Stephen! Stephen!
-You're not gonna hear it.-Okay, stop it! Stop it!
-You're never gonna hear it.-Now you're just being cruel!
-Oh, okay, whatever.-But I'm not gonna give in.
I'm not. I'm strong, man.
I will keepthe discourse high, okay?
I will not stoop to that.
Well, I have to say,I-I admire you. I really do.
-Thank you. -I mean,I've never seen a bald man,
okay, who looks like youwith that much courage.
-Unbelievable.-(laughter and groaning)
What the (bleep)did you just call me?
-I have hair, mother(bleep)!-(applause and cheering)
I will have you know,I shave my hair,
baby-handedAtlantic City casino ashtray!
Don't call me bald!
-(cheers and applause)-Mm.
You know what? You know what?
-What?-This is very immature.
I thought you were...I thought you were a nice guy,
-Larry Wil-bore...-Wait. (stammers)
but you know what,you're a nasty guy.
-I...-You're a nasty guy.
-No. I...-You're awful. Awful person.
Goddamn it!I've stooped to Trump's level.
-Donald Trump, ladiesand gentlemen. -Nasty person.
How does he do it?We'll be right back.
How did he make me do that?
I didn't want to do that!
Welcome back.I'm here with my panel.
First up, Nightly Show contributor Rory Albanese.
Nightly Show contributorRobin Thede.
And he's currentlygetting the word out
as part of Step on Up,an educational program
developed for peoplewith diabetic nerve pain.
And his new movie Barbershop: The Next Cut
opens on April 15--comedian, actor,
one of our favorite people,
Cedric the Entertainer,you guys.
And for everyone at home,join our conversation right now
on Twitter @NightlyShowusing the hashtag #Tonightly.
Okay, so this is a really...one of those just fun topics,
but I had to ask,especially with Rory.
'Cause, Rory,this is a big issue for you,
-and I know.-Mm-hmm.
This sounds serious,you guys, but isn't.
We're gonna talkabout Ghostbusters, okay?
-(laughter)-'Cause the trailer
for the all-female versionof Ghostbusters
popped up online last week,
and peoplewere losing their minds.
Some people said it was racist,
saying that the threewhite leads are scientists,
and the black girl,who's played by Leslie Jones--
very funny--works for the MTA.
And, like, why can't... whycan't she be a scientist, too?
Some people...some people were really upset.
Okay, I'm saying,is there any validity
to people being upset here?
Yeah, sure,if this was real life,
but it's a movieabout busting ghosts!
I mean, who cares!
If you're a fanof the original movie,
you know she's just playingErnie Hudson's role,
like, the everyday man.
But the other thing is,she works for the MTA,
but that doesn't meanshe's not smart.
-Right. -Yeah.-Like, she knows the city.
-She's billed as a municipalhistorian. -Yeah. Yeah.
-(applause)-I just think it's...
-People need to chill out.-Yeah, yeah, I think
there's people take ita little too serious.
I mean, really. And ifyou're gonna bust up ghosts,
do you want to be witha scientist or a bus driver?
Have you not seenthe video of the dude
and the Cleveland bus driver?That's what I want.
I want to rollwith the bus driver.
WILMORE:Yeah. It's true.
Is there, uh...is there anything to, like...
just becausethe history of film,
you know, the black person'salways the sidekick,
you know,and people are reacting
to more of that kind of legacy,where it's like,
"How come the black personcan't even be the scientist?"
Well, she's not a sidekick,though,
-she's a full-on Ghostbuster,you know, which is great. -Yeah.
No, I was gonna say I feel I'mprobably the most qualified here
-to talk about this. Um...-Yeah. -(laughter)
Which I think is important.No, I do think that
you're right, though,'cause it's a movie, and it's,
like, once you... But there isa component of it that's odd.
You said the Ernie Hudsoncharacter, it's, like,
you know, like, you couldsuspend your disbelief
that the citygets overrun by ghosts,
but you can't suspendyour disbelief
that a black woman has a PhD,do you know what I mean?
Like, it feels like there'sa component to it, like...
If you watch the trailer,the trailer has a part in it
where it's, like, "You're thesmartest person in the world,
and you'rethe best scientist ever,"
and then Leslie Jones is like,"And I'm street-smart,"
-and it's, like, well, I mean...-(audience groans)
-I didn't make the movie.I don't why... -(laughter)
-I'm telling youwhat people reacted to. -Right.
WILMORE: Like, that's wherethe reaction came from?
Yeah, 'cause... To me, it's morethe way the trailer is built.
It sort of sets it up in this,like, one, two, three.
"And I know... and I knowthings about the streets,"
and you're like,well, that's not...
And I agree that there'sa lot of smart people
who work for the MTA-- I mean,many of them are engineers.
-You know? That's how youbuild trains. -Yeah, absolutely.
But there is a component to itthat you go, "Oh, all right."
Like, I see why people got...
but people get upsetabout everything, so...
Right. If theywould have cast a white girl
to play that same role,we would've been mad
there was no black peoplein the movie at all.
-That's right.-And that's the other point.
Why does there only have to beone black Ghostbuster?
-I don't understand that.-But you got to think about it.
-She is an MTA workerand a Ghostbuster. -Right.
She... she knows bestabout the unions.
She... she came in thereand was like-- uh-uh,
you know, we're gonna get paidfor every ghost we bust.
Two-- these uniforms...
-She got it...-WILMORE: Yeah.
You needed her! The scientistsdon't think like that.
-I agree. -Right! Exactly!-They aren't thinking
how much we'regonna get paid per hour.
I just feel like, why doesLeslie Jones take (bleep)
-like people are giving herall the time? -Yeah, I know.
And it's like,"Are you kidding me?
You get castas a (bleep) Ghostbuster?"
-Like, you're taking that...-She didn't take it.
She's, you know,she responded, you know...
-No, she did, but it's like...-@Lesdoggg.
So, right there.
Well, let me read this, Rory,'cause this is a quote
from Leslie, uh...I think on Twitter.
That's fantastic.So, but my question is,
-are we all Ghostbusters?-Well...
-Are we really? -No, I mean,that's the thing that's...
Feels like it...requires a bit of training.
You know what I mean? I feellike we don't all have it.
It's... But there is that partof, like, how do you not say yes
to being in a iconic moviein any-in any capacity?
Like, if they madean Indiana Jones movie
and I had to play his,like, his Jewey accountant,
I'd be like, "I'm in!"You know what I mean?
Like, "Uh, uh, Dr. Jones,
you're spendingtoo much money on whips."
-You know, I would take that...-Right. Yeah.
...in a second, just to be apart of an Indiana Jones movie.
-Just to be a part of that movielegacy. -Yes.
-Go ahead, Robin. -It's so true.And I think some people
just want to be mad, you knowwhat I mean? Like, some people
just see something...They haven't even seen the movie
and they're mad. If Eddie Murphydid The Nutty Professor today,
they'd be like,"Yeah, he's a professor,
-but he got to be nutty?"-You're right.
-"Why he got to be nutty?"-Last year, the big argument--
-are we all Django?You know? -Right, right.
-Are we?-WILMORE: Are we Django? Are we?
Are we underestimating,uh, the problem
-with ghosts in the big city?-ALBANESE: Yes.
I feel like thatshould be the issue here--
I'm more concerned that we havefour rookie Ghostbusters
handling all of the ghostproblems in New York City.
-I agree.-I mean, I was here in '84
-when the last thingwent down, you know? -Exactly.
We get a Zuul situation on ourhands, I don't know if these...
-if they can handle this.-I think Donald Trump's a ghost.
We sure can't killthat (bleep) right now.
I don't know what the hell is...
No matter how hard you try.
That's actually why he paints...paints his face orange.
-Paints orange, that's right,oh! -Oh, I'm alive, I swear!
So if Hillary getsa proton pack, she's good.
-Oh, yeah.-Yeah. Right. What is that...
-What is that tan he's got?-WILMORE: I have no idea.
It's like a Cheetos tan.It's like...
-It is. -Does it stain more,it gets on your fingers?
-He just kind of...-WILMORE: He-he could be...
he could be one of thoseGhostbuster ghosts, you know?
-Right. -Like, spewing outCheetos stuff
or something, right?Do you believe in ghosts?
-No, man, no.-You don't believe in ghosts?
-No, I don't believe in ghosts.-Do you know...
-Do you know this placeis haunted? -But I like...
Like, when I watch... thosemedium shows, then I get scared.
-No, man, no. -You don'tthink there's any chance
-there's ghosts? -I thinkthat there may be ghosts,
but I don't believe in 'em,so if they exist,
-I'd go, "I don't believein you." -If you were in...
-ALBANESE: And then they just goaway. -Yeah, they go away.
-You'd be like, "All right,I won't be scared." -You don't
even need a Ghostbuster,you're like, "Just..."
I would be scared,but I don't believe in you, bro,
-so I'm sorry.-You just...
-you just throw awayhis existence. -Yeah.
-Like, I totally rip theirself-esteem. -By your ability...
That's what I do.Like, he's like, "Ooh!"
And I'm like, "You're nothing,you're not scaring me, you know,
I don't believe in you, bro."You know.
That is the same techniqueI use for Trump.
I-I don't believe in you,and then he just goes away.
If only he would go awaybecause of that!
All right, there you go.We'll be right back.
ANNOUNCER: If you live in the New York City area
or are planning to visit,
grab some free tickets to The Nightly Show.
Okay, thanks to my panelistsRory Albanese, Robin Thede
and Cedric the Entertainer.Special thanks to 2 Chainz
and Bob Dibuono as Donald Trumpfor being here.
-(cheering, applause)-We're almost out of time,
but before we go,I'm gonna Keep It 100 myself.
Tonight's questionis from @cirdec4666. Oh, my God.
They ask"A two-term Trump presidency
"cures all cancer.
Do you go for it?"
-Keep it 100.-Man, I know.
But-but doesn'tAmerica get cancer
if he becomes president, right?
Oh, man. I thinkI have to cure cancer, right?
-Yup -Yeah. -Yeah.-I got to cure cancer.
Sorry. Sorry, Trump,you get to be president.
All right, thanks for watching.I know, that's a sad...
-Don't give me these sad ones,you guys. -I know, I'm just...
Don't forget to ask me your KeepIt 100 questions on Twitter.
-Good Nightly, everyone.I get tea? -♪
(bleep), I don't get tea,come on.
MAN: Ooh, sorry.