A Clone of My Own

  • Season 2, Ep 15
  • 01/09/2008

Professor Farnsworth names his teenage clone to be the successor of his research.

( clears throat )

THANK YOU.

YOU KNOW,WHEN I WAS FIRST ASKED

TO MAKE A FILMABOUT MY NEPHEW--

PROFESSOR FARNSWORTH--

I THOUGHT, "WHY SHOULD I?"

THEN LATER,LEELA MADE THE FILM

BUT, IF I HAD MADE THE FILM

YOU CAN BETTHERE WOULD HAVE BEEN

MORE TOPLESS WOMENON MOTORCYCLES.

ROLL FILM.

( mysterious gong sounds )

( beep )

Leela: HUBERT J. FARNSWORTH

WAS BORN APRIL 9, 2851

IN NEW, NEW YORK'S NERDIEST SLUM--

HELL'S LABORATORY.

A PRECOCIOUS CHILD

YOUNG HUBERT LEARNED TO READ WHILE HE WAS STILL IN DIAPERS

AT AGE EIGHT, AND BEFORE LONG, HE BLOSSOMED

INTO A GREASY TEENAGER.

DORK ALERT!

AFTER 14 YEARS OF GRADUATE SCHOOL

HE SETTLED INTO THE GLAMOROUS LIFE OF A SCIENTIST.

FAST CARS...

TRENDY NIGHTSPOTS...

BEAUTIFUL WOMEN--

THE PROFESSOR DESIGNED THEM ALL

WORKING OUT OF HIS TINY ONE-ROOM APARTMENT.

FOR 50 YEARS, HE WORKED AT MOM'S FRIENDLY ROBOT COMPANY

WHERE HE CREATED THE FIRST ROBOT

CAPABLE OF QUALIFYING FOR A BOAT LOAN.

AND NOW, EVEN AS HE NEARS HIS 150th BIRTHDAY

THE PROFESSOR RETAINS THE FIERY PASSION OF YOUTH.

Listen to me,you pompous frauds!

If I'm going down,I'm taking you all with me.

( gong sounds )

( applause )

HOW ABOUT A FEW WORDS,PROFESSOR?

( stammering )

I SAID "WORDS."

( applause )

UH, WHAT A PLEASURE IT IS

TO SEE MY LIFETIMEOF ACCOMPLISHMENT

SUMMED UPIN A THREE-MINUTE FILM.

MY BEST YEARS ARE BEHIND ME--

SO MUCH LEFT UNDONE,SO LITTLE TIME.

FUNNY, FUNNY STUFF.

WHERE DID CUBERTCOME FROM?

12 YEARS AGO, I BEGANTHE CLONING PROCESS

BY REMOVINGSOME SKIN CELLS

FROM ONE OF THESHAPLIER GROWTHSON MY BACK.

WAIT. IF HE'S YOUR CLONE

WHY DOESN'T HIS NOSELOOK LIKE YOURS?

I LEFT HIM IN HISFIRST TUBE TOO LONG

AND HE GOT SQUISHEDUP AGAINST THE SIDE.

IS HE DUMB OR JUST UGLY?

LET'S FIND OUT.

( beep )

( metal clanking )

( sputtering and coughing )

WHAT, YOU'VE NEVER SEENA GENIUS'S WIENER BEFORE?

( negative remarks )

Fry:WELL, ONCEIN THE PARK.

( coins clinking )

MMM...

AS LONG AS I'M GOINGTO BE IN CHARGE HERE

LET ME EXAMINEMY SO-CALLED CREW

IF IT CAN SO BE CALLED.

FIRST OF ALL, DR. ZOIDBERG

DO YOU EVEN HAVEA MEDICAL DEGREE?

I LOST IT...

IN A VOLCANO.

AND WHY DO WE NEEDA BENDING ROBOT

AROUND HERE ANYWAY?

WHAT POSSIBLE USEDO WE HAVE FOR YOU?

UH, ME NO SPEAKA DA ENGLISH.

AND WHY DOES OUR SPACE PILOTHAVE ONLY ONE EYE?

THERE'S SOMEONEI'D LIKE YOU TO MEET.

HIS NAME IS DEPTH PERCEPTION.

( snorting laughter )

WHY, YOU LITTLE...

( whoosh )

WOW! THAT HURT...

THE AIR.

HIM PENDING PARA UN BENDING.

OH, CUBERT, COME IN HERE.

I HAVE SOMETHING AMAZINGTO SHOW YOU.

WHAT IS IT,A COMPETENT EMPLOYEE?

I DOUBT THAT VERY MUCH.

( chuckling )

LITTLE TWERP.

AY CHICHUAHUA!