June 4, 2015 - Evan Young's Graduation Speech & TSA Failures

  • 06/04/2015

A gay valedictorian delivers his graduation speech, and Dave Rubin, Angie Martinez and Tom Papa join Larry to discuss Caitlyn Jenner's ESPY Courage Award.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>> Larry: SUCH A GREAT

CROWD.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

THANK YOU.

I APPRECIATE IT.

>> LARRY!

LARRY!

>> Larry: YEAR VERY KIND.

YOU'RE VERY KIND.

WELCOME "NIGHTLY SHOW."

WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW TONIGHT.LANDO CALRISSIAN AND

POPEYE ARE ON THE THE SHOWTONIGHT.

LET'S GET RIGHT TO IT.

HEY, IT'S JUNE.

YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?

IT'S GRADUATION TIME, GUYS.

BACK IN THE DAY WHEN I WAS ASENIOR, MY CLASS VOTED ME MOST

LIKELY TO DUNGEONMASTER.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )YEAH.

THAT'S RIGHT.

SO CONGRATS TO THE CLASS OF2015!

CONGRATS.

AND LET ME TELL YOU, AS EXCITINGAS THIS IS FOR THE KIDS, FOR

PARENTS, THIS IS A TIME TOCHEER, RIGHT?

>> PEOPLE COULD BE THROWN INJAIL FOR CHEERING AT A HIGH

SCHOOL GRADUATION.

>> Larry: THROWN IN JAIL?

WHAT DID THEY DO, CHEER TOCREATE A DIVERSION AND ROB THE

AUDITORIUM AT GUNPOINT?

>> THE SUPERINTENDENT ASKED THECROWD NOT TO SCREAM OUT AND TO

HELD THEIR APPLAUSE IN THE END.

OTHERWISE, THEY'D BE ASKED TOLEAVE.

>> Larry: YEAH, BUT THEY MAKETHAT ANNOUNCEMENT AT EVERY

GRADUATION, BUT NOBODY LISTENS,RIGHT?

YOU ALWAYS CHEER, AND THEPRINCIPAL'S ALL GRUMPY ABOUT IT.

IT'S REALLY THE ONLY FUN THINGTHAT HAPPENS AT A GRADUATION.

WAITING FOR SOMEBODY TO BREAKTHAT RULE, RIGHT?

AND THEN IT'S LASER POINTER,AIRHORN, YOU ALL GO TO DINNER AT

BOB'S BIG BOYS.

IT'S PRETTY SIMPLE.

WHAT EXACTLY DID THESEGRADUATION RUINERS YELL TO

POTENTIALLY LAND IN JAIL?

>> YOU DID IT, BABY!

>> WHEN SHE WENT ACROSS THESTAGE I CALLED HER NAME OUT,

LAKAYDRA, JUST LIKE THAT.

>> Larry: THAT'S IT?

OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, MY IFDAUGHTER'S NAMED LAKAYDRA, AND

SHE'S GRADUATING HIGH SCHOOL,YOU BETTER BELIEVE I'M YELLING

YOU GO LAKAYDRA!

I'M YELLING IT.

I'M PROUD OF THAT.

LAKAYDRA MADE IT ACROSS.

WHAT DID LAKAYDRA'S FANS GETCHARGED WITH, RECKLESS PARENTAL

PRIDE?

>> THEY FILED DISTURBING THEPEACE CHARGES AGAINST THEM.

FOSTER SAID IT'S FARFROM RIDICULOUS.

HE'S DETERMINED TO HAVE ORDER ATTHESE CEREMONIES.

>> WHAT?

WHAT A TIGHT-ASS.

IT'S A GRADUATION.

PEOPLE ARE HAPPY.

LET PEOPLE BE HAPPY.

>> YOU'RE DOING IT, LARRY!

>> Larry: HEY, HEY, SIR, I'MGONNA HAVE TO ASK YOU TO LEAVE,

PLEASE.

>> BUT I'M HAPPY, LARRY.

YOU CALLED THAT GUY A TIGHT-ASS.

>> Larry: WILL SOMEONE PLEASEARREST THIS MAN AND GET HIM OUT

OF MY SHOW, PLEASE.

GET OUT OF HERE.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>> YOU SAID YOU WANTED PEOPLE TO

BE HAPPY!

>> Larry: TAKE HIM AWAY.

I WANT ORDER IN MY SHOW!

NO CELEBRATION.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )OKAY.

OUR NEXT GRADUATION STORY TAKESPLACE IN THE HAPPY POT-FILLED

HILLS OF COLORADO.

>> YOU HAVE HEARD THE STORY OF AVALEDICTORIAN FROM A COLORADO

HIGH SCHOOL BEING BARRED FROMDELIVERING HIS GRADUATION SPEECH

BECAUSE IN THAT SPEECH HEPLANNED TO REVEAL THAT HE WAS

GAY.

>> Larry: HE WAS BARREDBECAUSE HE WAS GOING TO SAY HE

WAS GAY?

WHAT'S GOING ON, GRADUATIONS.

YOU CAN'T SHOUT OUT.

YOU CAN'T COME OUT.

SERIOUSLY.

NEXT THING YOU KNOW, THEY'REGOING TO WANT YOU TO WEAR PANTS

UNDER THOSE ROBES.

LARRY SAID WHEN SPEAKING ABOUT AFRIEND.

OKAY, FINE, SO DOUCHEY PRINCIPALWOULDN'T LET THIS VALEDICTORIAN

COME OUT AT THE SPEECH. BUT WHYWAS HE BARRED FROM SPEAKING?

>> I MADE ALL THE EDITS THEYASKED ME TO BUT I REFUSED TO

TAKE OUT THE PART WHERE I SAID IWAS GAY BECAUSE I THOUGHT THAT

WAS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OFTHE SPEECH.

>> Larry: YEAH, MAN.

THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

GOOD FOR YOU.

( APPLAUSE )OKAY, SO, HE WAS GOING TO COME

OUT IN FRONT OF THE WHOLESCHOOL, RIGHT?

HOW DID EVAN END UP TELLING HISPARENTS HE'S GAY.

>> IT WAS MR. BACHMANN WHOCALLED EVAN'S PARENTS TO TELL

THEM HE WOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TOSPEAK.

AND IT WAS ALSO MR. BACHMANN WHOTOLD HIS PARENTS THEIR SON WAS

GAY.

>> Larry: MR. BACHMANN, THEPRINCIPAL, HE OUTED THIS KID TO

HIS PARENTS. HOW'D THAT CALL GO?"MR. YOUNG,

YOUR P.T.A. MEETING GOT PUSHEDBACK, AND YOUR SON IS GAY.

GOTTA RUN."

THE PRINCIPAL'S JOB IS TO OPENUP LIFE'S OPPORTUNITIES NOT TO

TAKE AWAY ONE OF LIFE'S BIGGESTMOMENTS.

IT'S A SHAME THIS KID DIDN'T GETTO MAKE A SPEECH ABOUT

TOLERANCE.

IT WOULD BE A SHAME NOT TO HEARIT.

WHICH IS WHY I FLEW HIM OUTHERE. PLEASE WELCOME READING HIS

SPEECH EVAN YOUNG, EVERYBODY.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )EVAN, WELCOME TO THE SHOW.

AND CONGRATULATIONS ON BEING SOBRAVE AND TAKING A STAND.

WE'RE ALL SO PROUD OF YOU.

( CHEERING )WE'RE GOING TO HAVE YOU GIVE

KIND OF AN ABRIDGED VERSION OFYOUR SPEECH BECAUSE WE'RE

TELEVISION.

WE CAN'T DO THE WHOLE SPEECH,OKAY.

BUT IT'S THE SPEECH YOU WEREGOING TO GIVE AT YOUR

GRADUATION, AND WE'RE GOING TOTHROW THE WHOLE SPEECH ON THE

WEB.

SO IF ANYBODY WANTS TO SEE THEWHOLE SPEECH, YOU CAN SEE IT

THERE.

EVAN, THIS IS A SPEECH YOUWROTE.

THESE ARE YOUR EXACT WORDS,RIGHT?

>> THAT'S RIGHT.

>> Larry: OKAY, EVAN YOUNG,LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

( APPLAUSE )>> IN THE WORD OF ONE OF MY

HEROES, STEPHEN COLBERT -->> Larry: WAIT, WAIT!

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE )

DID YOU JUST SAY STEPHENCOLBERT?

YOU WROTE THAT?

COME ON, MAN.

>> WELL, YEAH, IT'S WHAT'S INTHE TEXT OF MY SPEECH.

>> Larry: YOU CAN'T SAY THATCRAP ON THIS SHOW, MAN.

SERIOUSLY.

WHO BOUGHT YOU A ROUNDTRIPTICKET WITH JUST ONE LAYOVER?

>> YOU DID.

>> Larry: EXACTLY, I DID.

CONTINUE.

>> OKAY.

IN THE WORD OF ONE OF MY HEROES,LARRY WILMORE.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

>> Larry: THAT'S AVALEDICTORIAN, Y'ALL.

NOW LET'S HEARTPART YOU REFUSEDTO CHANGE.

GO AHEAD.

>> ALL RIGHT.

SINCE WE'RE NEVER GOING TO SEEEACH OTHER AGAIN I THOUGHT I

SHOULD SHARE SEVERAL OF MYDEEPEST AND DARKEST SECRETS.

FIRST, I DISLIKE DOING HOMEWORK.

NOT ALL HOMEWORK IS BAD.

SOMETIMES IT'S HELPFUL.

BUT LIKE THE HEIMLICH MANEUVERYOU'RE ONLY SUPPOSED TO DO IT

WHEN IT'S ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY.

OTHERWISE YOU'RE JUST GOING TOMAKE CHILDREN THROW UP FOR NO

REASON. MISS GILMORE,

I ONLY READ ABOUT HALFWAYTHROUGH "CRIME AND PUNISHMENT"

BEFORE SWITCHING TO SPARKNOTESFOR THE REMAINDER OF THE BOOK.

AND MY BIGGEST SECRET OF ALL.

I'M GAY.

I UNDERSTAND THIS MIGHT BEOFFENSIVE TO SOME PEOPLE BUT

IT'S WHO I AM.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )WHEN I WAS WRITING THIS SPEECH,

I WAS ENDLESSLY DEBATING WITHMYSELF WHETHER I SHOULD REVEAL

THIS ON ACCOUNT OF HOW DIVISIVEAN ISSUE THIS IS AND HOW GAY

PEOPLE TEND TO BE STEREOTYPEDBUT I THOUGHT IF I DID I SHOULD

REPEATEDLY APOLOGIZE AND BEG YOUGUYS NOT TO THINK DIFFRERENTLY

OF ME. BUT THEN I REALIZED, IDON'T HAVE TO.

I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO.

IF THERE'S ONE THING I LEARNEDAT THIS SCHOOL IT'S THAT WE CAN

STILL BE FRIENDS EVEN IF WEPROFOUNDLY DISAGREE WITH EACH

OTHER.

I HAVE ONE FINAL REQUEST FORYOU.

HUG SOMEONE.

THAT'S RIGHT, HUG SOMEONE.

STUDENTS, HUG A TEACHER.

DEMOCRATS, HUG A REPUBLICAN.

( LAUGHTER )PEOPLE WHO OWN A GUN, HUG ONE OF

THOSE HARD LIBERALS WHO WANT TOSNATCH IT OUT OF YOUR COLD DEAD

FINGERS.

TREKKIES, HUG SOMEONE WHO LIKESSTAR WARS MORE.

MEL GIBSON, HUG A JEWISH PERSON.

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE )

CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIANS, HUG ANAGNOSTIC.

HUG A GAY PERSON WHILE YOU'RE ATIT, TOO.

ACTUALLY, PLEASE DON'T, BECAUSEI DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO HUG

EVERYONE HERE BUT YOU GET THEPOINT.

AND FINALLY, WE'RE AT THE PARTYOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR, THE

END OF THE SPEECH.

GOOD-BYE, EVERYONE!

I'LL MISS YOU.

AND WHATEVER HAPPENS TO YOU,WHEREVER WE GO, MY ONLY HOPE IS

THAT WE'LL MEET AGAIN, DON'TKNOW WHERE, DON'T KNOW WHEN.

>> Larry: EVAN YOUNG,EVERYBODY!

>> THANK YOU.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )YOU CAN SEE THE WHOLE SPEECH ON

THE WEB.

CHECK IT OUT.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

YEAH!

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

>> Larry: WELCOME BACK.

NOW, WE LEARNED SOME VERYTROUBLING NEWS ABOUT AIRPORT

SECURITY THIS WEEK.

>> THE ACTING CHIEF OF THET.S.A. BEING REASSIGNED

FOLLOWING AN UNDERCOVEROPERATION THAT SHOWED 95% OF

DANGEROUS ITEMS GETTING THROUGHSECURITY.

INCLUDING WEAPONS AND FAKEBOMBS.

>> Larry: COME ON.

WHY DO WE HAVE TO FOCUS ON THENEGATIVE?

THEY STOPPED 5% OF THOSE FAKEBOMBS.

WHY CAN'T YOU LOOK AT THE GLASSONE EYE DROPPER FULL?

TO HELP ME UNDERSTAND THECURRENT STATE OF AIRPORT

SECURITY, PLEASE WELCOME AIRPORTSECURITY EXPERT SALLY GELLER.

THANKS FOR JOINING US,MISS GELLER.

WHAT DO YOU SAY TO PEOPLE WHOACCUSE YOU OF NOT DOING YOUR

JOB?

>> LARRY, IN THE PAST WEEK ICONFISCATED 942 BOTTLES OF

AQUAFINA.

DON'T TELL ME I'M NOT DOING MYJOB.

I GOT ENOUGH WATER HERE TO SOLVETHE DAMN CALIFORNIA DROUGHT.

>> Larry: OKAY.

ALL RIGHT, I UNDERSTAND.

BUT IS FOCUSING ON WATER KEEPINGUS SAFE?

LISTEN TO THIS TRAVELER DESCRIBEHOW HIS MOTHER GOT HER WATER

CONFISCATED.

>> MY MOM, WHO IS 76 YEARS OLD,AND SHE SAID I NEED A LITTLE

WATER TO TAKE MY PILLS.

NO, THROW IT OUT. IT'SRIDICULOUS

>> SOME OLD LADIES LIE, LARRY.

YOU CAN'T BELIEVE PEOPLEJUST BECAUSE THEY ARE WRINKLEY.

>> Larry: HOLD ON, NO, NO, NO.

SHE NEEDED HER MEDICATION.

WHY WOULDN'T YOU LET HER KEEPHER WATER?

>> WHO'S TO SAY SHE WASN'T GOINGTO THROW THAT WATER IN THE

PILOT'S EYES AND HIJACK THATPLANE TO COPACABANA.

OR MAYBE IT WASN'T EVEN WATER.

MAYBE IT WAS THAT DYNAMITE JUICEWILE E. COYOTE GETS FROM THE

ACME COMPANY.

>> THERE'S NO SUCH THING ASDYNAMITE JUICE

THE T.S.A. MISSED THE WEAPONSAND FAKE BOMBS.

>> LISTEN TO YOURSELF-- THEYWERE FAKE BOMBS.

THAT'S WHY I LET THEM THROUGH,STUPID.

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE )

>> Larry: OKAY, ALL RIGHT.

>> IF IT WAS A REAL BOMB, MAYBEI'D HAVE STOPPED IT.

>> Larry: ANOTHER I GET IT, IGET IT.

BUT IT WAS A TEST.

YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO LOOK OUTFOR THAT KIND OF THING.

>> LARRY, I CAN DO WHATEVER IWANT!

SIR, TAKE YOUR PANTS OFF, NOW?

>> Larry: WAIT, WAIT A MINUTE.

WHY ARE YOU TELLING SOMEONETO TAKE THEIR PANTS OFF?

>> CALM DOWN, LARRY.

I KNOW THESE RULES MIGHT SEEMODD TO A CIVILIAN LIKE YOU,

SOMEONE WITHOUT AN EXTREMELYHIGH LEVEL OF SECURITY TRAINING.

BUT WE GOT THIS COVERED.

>> Larry: OKAY.

I-- I SEE WHAT YOU'RE SAYING.

THAT THERE'S A METHOD TOTHIS, RIGHT, THAT YOU DON'T UPON

TO REVEAL.

YOU'RE PLAYING CHESS, AND THETERRORISTS ARE PLAYING CHECKERS,

RIGHT?

>> YEAH, I DON'T FOLLOW SPORTS,LARRY.

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE )

BUT LET ME TELL YOU THIS-- IF ATERRORIST EVER GETS PAST ME, HE

AIN'T GETTING PAST ME WITH ANYWATER.

( LAUGHTER )( APPLAUSE )

YEAH.

HE'S GOING TO DIE OF THIRSTBECAUSE I'M TAKING THAT WATER!

>> Larry: OKAY.

SALLY, THIS ISABSOLUTELY NOT HELPFUL AT ALL.

I'M STILL FRIGHTENED TO FLY.

>> GOOD, THAT'S HOW WE DO.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )OH, OH, I GOTTA GO.

THAT OLD LADY, I THINK SHE'SCARRYING SOME WATER!

HEY!

THAT WHEELCHAIR AIN'T FOOLINGNOBODY!

>> Larry: NO, NO, NO.

SECURITY EXPERT SALLY GALLER,LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE'LL BE

RIGHT BACK.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

>> Larry: WELCOME BACK.

I'M HERE WITH COMEDIAN AND HOSTOF THE APTLY NAMED "THE RUBIN

REPORT," DAVE RUBIN.

AND HOST OF "THE VOICE OF NEWYORK," ANGIE MARTINEZ.

AND COMEDIAN AND HOST OF THEAPTLY NAMED NEW QUIZ SHOW,

"BOOM," PREMIERING ON FOX JUNE25, THE VERY FUNNY TOM PAPA.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )LET'S GET TO IT.

SO CAITLYN JENNER HAS BEENMAKING A LOT OF BUZZ LATELY

>> NO.

>> Larry: YES, IT'S TRUE.

AND-- IT'S ALL OVER EVERYTHING,FACEBOOK.

EVERYBODY IS TALKING ABOUT IT.

ESPN IS AWARDING THIS YEAR ATTHEIR ESPY'S ARTHUR ASHE COURAGE

AWARD TO CAITLYN JENNER, ANDIT'S FUNNY HOW PEOPLE GET MAD AT

THAT.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

SOME SAY THE AWARD SHOULD HAVEGONE TO AN IRAQ WAR VET OR

BASKETBALL PLAYER WHO DIED OFCANCER THAT THERE HAS TO BE A

COURAGE-OFF, SOMETHING LIKETHAT.

I PERSONALLY THINK NO MATTERWHAT THE MOTIVATION BEHIND IT,

IT'S GREAT.

DOING ALL THAT IN FRONT OFPEOPLE.

>> YES.

>> Larry: IT'S A GREAT THING.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

>> YOU DON'T LOSE BODY PARTS FORATTENTION.

YOU MAY DO OTHER THINGS.

YOU MAY MARRY, DATE SOMEBODY FORATTENTION, YOU MAY DO THINGS

LIKE THAT, BUT CHANGING WHO YOUARE, YOUR IDENTITY, AND

AFFECTING THE KIDS THE WAY ITHAS.

>> Larry: IT'S EVEN DEEPERTHAN CHANGING.

THE PEOPLE THAT PEOPLE WEREUNDERSTANDING IT'S NOT EVEN

CHANGING.

IT'S REVEALING.

>> RIGHT.

FOR ESPN FOR THEIR AWARD,SPORTS.

I KNOW THERE ARE A LOT OF YOUNGPEOPLE THAT DON'T KNOW BRUCE

JENNER WAS AN ATHLETE.

SO IT'S BRAVE.

WHAT WOULD BE REALLY BRAVE ISIF, LIKE, LeBRON SHOWED UP AT

THE PLAY-OFFS IN HEELS.

>> THAT WOULD BE AMAZING!

>> HEELS AND FALSIE AND BE LIKE,"YEAH, PEOPLE, DEAL WITH IT

IT."

>> I WOULD SO TUNE IN.

>> I CAN'T TELL YOU GUYS -->> I PRAY YOU NEVER RUN INTO

LeBRON JAMES.

>> I CAN'T TELL YOU GUYS HOWIMPORTANT MY PENIS IS TO ME.

>> REALLY?

>> YEAH!

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ME.

>> I'M THE ONLY ONE HERE WITHOUTA PENIS.

>> YEAH.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>> YOU DON'T KNOW THAT.

( LAUGHTER )>> I'M NOT READY!

I'M NOT READY TODAY!

YOU CANT FORCE ME!

>> Larry: I HAVE TO LEARN NOTTO ASK.

>> WAS THAT APPLAUSE PRO VAGINAOR ANTI-PENIS.

>> PRO VAGINA.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>> PRO YOU--

>> BACK TO YOUR PENIS.

>> MY PENIS SO IMPORTANT TOME, IF SOMEONE CUT OFF THEIR

PENIS THE NAME OF HAPPINESS,( BLEEP ), THAT'S AMAZING.

YOU WHAT I MEAN?

>> HE HASN'T CUT IT OFF, RIGHT?

>> IT HASN'T BEEN CONFIRMED THATHE'S POST-OP YET.

>> Larry: PART OF THE ISSUETHAT THIS BRINGS UP IS THAT'S

REALLY NONE OF OUR BUSINESS,RIGHT?

>> SURE.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

>> THEY'RE KIND OF MAKINGEVERYTHING OUR BUSINESS.

>> Larry: I THINK THIS PARTIS, LIKE, NONE OF OUR BUSINESS.

BUT THIS PART IS THE PART THATPEOPLE ARE GOING, "OH."

>> TO ME THAT'S THE BRAVESTTHING IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT

BRAVERY.

IT'S NOT THAT HE DECIDED TOBECOME A SHE.

IT'S THAT THE AT 60-WHATEVER YOUARE IN SCANTILY CLAD LINGERIE,

AND SHOWING EVERYONE YOURCHICKEN NECK BAGGY KNEES.

I MEAN, TO ME THIS IS NOT ATHING ABOUT GENDER.

THIS IS NOT A THING ABOUT ANY--IT'S JUST ABOUT OLD PEOPLE KEEP

YOUR CLOTHES ON!

WHY?

WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT SEXWITH OLD PEOPLE?

I JUST GOT-- I JUST GOT PASTDEALING WITH TELLING MY KIDS

WHAT THESE WIERD VIAGRA ADSWERE DOING THE SUPER BOWL.

NOW I HAVE TO TELL THEM THESEOLD PEOPLE ARE COMING AND TAKING

THEIR CLOTHES OFF.

>> Larry: SHE'S CREATING A WHOLENEW BRAND OF UNCOMFORTABLE

LIVING ROOM COMMERCIAL WATCHING.

>> THAT IS UNDENIABLE.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

YOU'RE JUST GOING TO COMEWALKING AROUND-- THAT'S GOING TO

BE THE NEXT THING ALL THESE OLDPEOPLE GOING, "JUST DEAL WITH

IT, PEOPLE."

AND I THINK-- I THINK EVERYBODY,TRANSGENDER, EVERYBODY IS GONNA

UNITE AT THAT PART AND GO, HELLNO.

>> SHE'S PROBABLY BEEN WAITINGSO LONG, THOUGH, TO WEAR THINGS

LIKE THAT, THAT SHE FINALLY HADHER MOMENT AND SHE JUST WORE

EVERYTHING-->> IT'S HARD TO LIVE ONE LIFE,

BUT LIVING TWO LIVES.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

I LIVED CLOSETED FOR A LONGTIME.

>> REALLY.

>> HOW LONG?

>> FOR 28-SOME-ODD YEARS.

>> CAN I TELL YOU SOMETHING ILEARNED.

I LEARNED THIS YESTERDAYSPEAKING TO SOMEBODY WHO DOES

TRANSGENDER RIGHTS.

TRANSVESTITE IS A STRAIGHT MAN--I WAS ASKING THE DIFFERENCE

BETWEEN TRANSSEXUAL,TRANSGENDER, AND TRANSVESTITE.

A TRANSVESTITE IS A STRAIGHT MANWHO LIKES TO WEAR HIS WIFE'S--

>> WHEN YOU WATCHED HIM COME OUTIN THE INTERVIEW WAS THERE A

PART OF YOU, AFTER BEING IN THECLOSET FOR THAT LONG--

>> I GOT IT.

I GOT IT.

I THINK IT'S KIND OF FUNNY,L.G.B.T., WE'RE NOT REALLY

CONNECTED.

I DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH IN COMMONWITH SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO

TRANSITION TO THE OTHER SEX, BUTTHE FEELING --

>> I ALWAYS THOUGHT "B" WASRIDING THE COAST TAILS OF "L"

AND "G."

>> THEY JUST WANT EVERYBODY.

YOU EVER SEE THE BISEXUALS ATTHE GAY IT PRIDE PARADE.

THERE ARE ALWAYS LIKE FOURBISEXUALS LIKE, "WE'RE HERE."

>> BUT THE FEELING, THE FEELINGOF LIVING WITH THIS THING.

IT'S HARD TO LIVE ONE LIFE, ANDYOU'RE DOING A DOUBLE LIFE?

>> Larry: DO YOU THINK THERE'SA RIGHT WAY TO COME OUT?

LIKE, SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT WAYOF COMING OUT MAYBE IT'S TOO

BIG.

AND WE HAD THE KID, YOU KNOW,WHERE THE PRINCIPAL CALLS THE

HOUSE AND COMES OUT.

DO YOU THINK IT'S OKAY FORSOMEONE ELSE TO OUT SOMEBODY?

BECAUSE THE ADVOCATE USED TO DOTHAT TYPE OF THING.

>> ACTUALLY, I HAVE A LIST-->> THAT'S TERRIBLE.

DON'T DO IT.

>> I HAVE A LIST OF PEOPLE -->> YOU WANT TO OUT?

YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T DO THIS.

>> I HAVE A LIST OF GAY PEOPLE--OH, I'M SORRY, THESE ARE JUST

REPUBLICAN PRESIDENTIALCANDIDATES.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>> Larry: ALL RIGHT, WE'LL BE

RIGHT BACK.

WE'LL TALK ABOUT MORE OF THIS.