Legalize Meth

  • Season 2, Ep 7
  • 11/16/2011

A "Legalize Meth" campaign has trouble winning public support, two drunk chicks go on a fast food adventure, and a new father deals with a perilous postnatal ward.

AND A LOT OF STUFFDOESN'T MAKE IT

FOR COST REASONSOR BECAUSE IT'SJUST SO DUMB...

- ( laughing )- ...THAT THE NETWORK'S JUST LIKE "REALLY?

HOW OLD ARE YOU GUYS?"BUT THIS WAS ONE--

THIS WAS ONEOF MY FAVORITE ONES THAT DIDN'T MAKE IT.

AND I HAD WRITTEN ITA LONG TIME AGOFOR SEASON ONE.

IT STILL NEVER MADE IT.AND IT'S A PRODUCTFOR A DRINK.

AND YOU ALL--YOU GUYS KNOWVITAMIN WATER, RIGHT?

- Man: YEAH.- THIS, I THINK, IS A BETTER TAKE ON VITAMIN WATER.

- IT'S VICODIN WATER.- ( laughing )

I MEAN, YEAH,VITAMINS ARE GREAT, OKAY.

BUT VICODIN MAKES YOU FEELA LITTLE BIT BETTER.

YOU COULD OF A LOTOF THINGS ON VICODIN

AND NOT FEEL IT.

IT'S SO REPLENISHING.

YEAH, I'VE HADSOME VICODIN EXPERIENCE.

I-- ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS.

I GOT MY WISDOM TEETH OUT ONCE.ANYBODY EVER HAD THAT--

- WISDOM TEETH?- People: YEAH.

BRUTAL, RIGHT?

MY FRIEND ISSUCH AN IDIOT.

SO I GOTMY WISDOM TEETH OUT--I GET ALL FOUR--

HAS ANYBODY EVER HADALL FOUR OUT?

- Woman: YEAH.- YEAH, YOU HAVE. FROM JERSEY?

- Woman: YEAH.- YEAH, BUT THAT WAS IN A FIGHT, RIGHT?

IT WAS-- IT WAS LIKE"YEAH, GET THE --OUTTA HERE.

EAGLES!"YOU'RE LIKE, "OW!"

I-- NO, I GOTALL FOUR OUT

AND MY BUDDY'SSUCH A DRUG ADDICT.

HE'S LIKE "OH, YOU GOTYOUR WISDOM TEETH OUT?"

I'M LIKE "YEAH." HE GOES,"THEY GIVE YOU VICODIN?"

I'M LIKE"YEAH, I HAVE 30."

HE'S LIKE"DON'T TAKE 'EM, DUDE."

I'M LIKE "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"HE'S LIKE "DON'T TAKE 'EM.

WE'RE GOINGTO VEGAS IN A MONTH.JUST SAVE 'EM."

I'M LIKE "WHAT?!"LIKE, I'M IN HORRIFYING PAIN.

FOUR WISDOM TEETH OUT ISLIKE FREDDY KRUEGER -- WENTAPE-- IN YOUR MOUTH.

IT'S JUST LIKE...( mimics scream )LIKE MURDER, LIKE BLOOD

IT'S AWFUL.IT'S SO MUCH PAIN.

AND MY -- FRIEND'S LIKE"NO, JUST-- JUST TOUGH IT OUT."

SO I TOUGHED IT OUTFOR A MONTH.

IT WAS AWFUL.AND I SAVED 'EM FOR VEGAS.

AND ME AND HIM SPLITALL 30 IN A WEEKEND.

- YEAH!- YEAH, LET'S JUST SAY

I WENTTO -- AVATAR LAND

to protest the laws against marijuana.

Meanwhile, across the street

another group has organized a different sort of protest.

- I caught up with them there to investigate the story.- Men: WE WANT METH!

METH GETS A BAD WRAP.WE'RE TRYING TOGET OUR VOICE.

THAT'S WHATWE WANNA TO DO HERE. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

IT'S LIKE MARIJUANA'S GOTA VOICE AND THEY'VE GOT HEMP.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?CRYSTAL METH GETS ASSOCIATEDWITH DRUG ABUSE,

BUT THAT'S GOTALTERNATE USES TOO.YOU CAN MAKE CLOTHING.

I'M-- I'M WEARINGA METH T-SHIRT RIGHT NOW.

LOOK AT THAT. LOOK AT THIS.I JUST BOUGHT IT AT THE STORE.

THAT LOOKS LIKEIT'S JUST METH WIPEDALL OVER YOUR BODY THERE.

NO, IT'S NOT.IT'S A T-SHIRT.BOUGHT IT.

REALLY?YOUR T-SHIRT HAS NIPPLES.

- DO YOU KNOW THAT?- YEAH, IT COMES WITH NIPPLES.

Man: METH HELP YOU TAKE CARE OF YOUR BODY, HELP YOU LOSE YOUR BODY WEIGHT.

LIKE, I'M A 40-YEAR-OLD MAN,BUT I GOT TONS OF ENERGY.

I MEAN EVEN MORE ENERGYTHAN BETTY AND SHE 19.

- Reporter: SIR.- Jerry: YEAH?

HOW DOES THIS ACTIVITYAFFECT YOUR DIET?

WE'RE ON A HUNGER STRIKERIGHT NOW.

WE'RE NOT--WE'RE NOT BIG EATERS, ANYWAY,

BECAUSE WE THINK FOOD ISKIND OF POISON FOR YOUR BODY.

- MMM.- AND IT'S-- A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T KNOW

THAT DAIRYIS TOXIC FOR YOU.

WE HAVE OVER 12 SIGNATURES,SO I'M PRETTY EXCITED.

I HAVE 500,000 SIGNATURES!WE'RE ON THE BALLOT, MAN!

IT'S DONE. DONE.

YOU JUST SIGNEDYOUR OWN NAME 500,000 TIMES!

I KNOW, MAN.I'VE BEEN UP FOR THREE DAYS.STAYED UP FOR THREE DAYS

AND I GOTALL THE SIGNATURES,SO WE'RE GOOD.

- WE WON!- Reporter: WOW.

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