Wednesday, October 30, 2013

  • 10/30/2013

The contestants review the Nintendo DS from a gorilla's perspective.

>> I WANT TO GIVE YOU A HASHTAGAND YOU GIVE ME A TWEET WITH THE

CORRECT HASHTAG YOU'LL GET AHUNDRED POINTS IN HONOR OF

HALLOWEEN WHICH STARTED MINUTESAGO.

I DON'T WEAR A WATCH.

THAT'S WHAT MY PHONE DOES.

TONIGHT'S HASHTAG IS BADHOLIDAYS, BAD HOLIDAYS.

SO EXAMPLES MIGHT BE WHITEHISTORY WEEK OR WORLD HERPES DAY

OR TAINT PATRICK'S DAY MIGHT BEA TERRIBLE HOLIDAY.

PUT ON YOUR GREEN UNDERWEAR.

I'M GOING TO PUT 60 SECONDS ONTHE CLOCK STARTING NOW.

GO, YES.

SCOTT AUKERMAN.

>> FATHER'S GAY.

>> FUN.

MEGAN NEURINGER.

>> HASHTAG SHARK WEEK.

>> FINE, FINE.

YES, SCOTT AUKERMAN.

>> SINK FULL OF MAYO.

>> CANADIAN THANKSGIVING.

>> EVEN THOUGH WE'RE IN CANADA,SORRY GUYS.

>> THE DAY AFTER LABOR DAY ISSTILLBORN DAY.

IT ACTUALLY IS.

>> AUKERMAN.

>> ERECTION DAY AKA CHINESEELECTION DAY.

[LAUGHTER]>> AM I RACIST.

>> YES, YOU ARE.

>> OKAY.

>> THANK YOU.

>> MEGAN MEURG.

.>> CANADIAN VALENTINE'S DAY.

>> YOU HAD ONE MORE.

IT'S TIME FOR OUR NEXT GAME.

REAL DOLL OR GUEST MODEL.

A LOT OF COMPANIES LIKE TO USEFACEBOOK AS A PROMOTIONAL TOOL.

I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU A PARTIALIMAGE OF A SYNDICATELY CLAD --

SCATILY CLAD AND YOU NEED TOTELL ME IF IT'S FROM THE

FACEBOOK PAGE BECAUSE THE BODIESARE ALMOST IDENTICAL IT'S CRAZY.

HERE WE GO.

THE FIRST ONE IN LINGERIE.

REAL DOLLAR OR GUEST MODEL.

YES, MEGAN.

>> REAL DOLL.

>> NO, THAT'S A GITION MODEL.

--THAT'S A GUEST MODEL.

>> I'M PROBABLY NOT AS EQUIPPEDAS THESE GUYS.

>> REAL DOLLS DON'T NEED TORELAX ON THE COUCH.

I KNEW THAT.

>> THEY DO HAVE THE UNFORTUNATETHRASHING THEY USUALLY GET EVEN

THOUGH REAL DOLLS ARE LIKE INEED A MINUTE, PLEASE.

>> AND THOSE DOLL'S LEGS ARENEVER TOGETHER.

>> IF I CAN PROVE GUEST MODELSAREN'T REAL DO WE WIN.

>> YES.

THE NEXT ONE A LOT OF MIDRIFFSHOWING.

SCOTT AUKERMAN.

>> REAL DOLL.

>> THAT IS A REAL DOLL.

>> NO.

>> IT LOOKS SO DEAD.

>> I WONDER IF THAT CHAIR'SREAL.

>> IS ANYTHING REAL.

>> NO, MAN, THEY'RE ALL DOLLS.

ALL RIGHT.

SHE'S ONLY LIKE TWO THAT WAS --TWO INCHES CALL.

>> PERSONALLY I WON'T [BLEEP]ANYTHING UNDER THREE INCHES.

>> ALL RIGHT.

THIS IS BLACK LINGERIE.

REAL DOLL OR GUEST MODEL.

MEGAN.

>> GUEST MODEL.

>> NO, THAT IS A REAL DOLL.

LOOK AT THAT.

>> SHE COMES WITH HER EYESCROSSED LIKE THAT.

>> WHAT HAPPENED.

>> IS SHE BEING LIKE DORKABLE.

>> SHE'S A CLEVER AND AHOUSEWIFE.

>> NEXT SEASON IS THE NEW GIRL.

>> CAN YOU ORDER THEM WITH LAZYEYES.

>> YES.

YOU CAN PROBABLY MOVE THEIR EYESAROUND.

IF YOU EVER WANT [BLEEP]PROFESSOR THAT WOULD BE THE WAY

OF DOING THAT.

>> BLEEP STUPID.

[LAUGHTER]>> OKAY, LAST ONE.

REAL DOLL OR GUEST MODEL?

YES, NEURINGER.

>> THOSE ARE CLEARLY REAL DOLLS.

>> YES, THAT IS A REAL DOLL.

>> ALL OF THEM?

>> YES, ALL OF THEM.

THEY'RE ALL REAL DOLLS.

>> NOT ALL OF THEM.

>> A PILE OF THEM.

>> I JUST CAN TELL BECAUSE THEYDON'T HAVE ANY LINE BIKINI LINE

RASH.

>> A WOMAN THAT KNOWS WHAT TOLOOK FOR.

THAT'S WHY YOU'RE GOOD ATSNIFFING THESE OUT.

THAT'S A BAD WAY TO SAY THAT.

YES.

>> YES, IF YOU ARE LEGS ARE OPENLIKE THAT.

>> BEFORE THE BREAK I SHOWED APICTURE OF A GRILL YEAH PLAYING

A NINTENDO.

I ASKED YOU TO WRITE THEGORILLA'S REVIEW OF THE NINTENDO

GAMING SYSTEM.

WHAT DID YOU SAY MATT BESSER.

>> I SAID TWO OPPOSABLE THUMPSUP COULD NOT GET BANANA AFTER

WORK.

[LAUGHTER]>> DID YOU ADD THE EXTRA BECAUSE

OF THE GORILLA.

>> YES, THAT'S WHAT I DID.

IT'S GOT TO BE FUNNY.

[LAUGHTER]>> YOU WERE RIGHT.

>> YEAH, RIGHT.

[LAUGHTER]>> WHAT DID YOU SAY?

>> VERY DISAPPOINTED IN HOW THEGAME DONKEY KONG IS.

I THINK -- GOT ALL THE WAY TOTHE END.

BUT HE DIDN'T LIKE IT.

>> MEGAN NEURINGER.

>> ME LIKE MADE ME FORGET IWAITED TO DIE IN ZOO.

GOTH CONFESSION.

IN THE HONOR OF HALLOWEEN.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]I AM DRESSED LIKE A DOUCHEBAG

VERSION OF MYSELF.

WE'RE GOING TO CELEBRATE PEOPLEWHO PLAY DRESS UP EVERY DAY OF

THE YEAR KEEPING IT ALIVE.

I WANT TO SHOW YOU GUYS THEYOUTUBE VIDEO FROM A YOUNG GUY

MAKING A CONFESSION AND GIVINGYOU TWO CHOICES.

FOR TO POINTS YOU TELL ME WHATTHEY'RE CONFESSING.

A OR B CHOICE.

THE FIRST ONE, WHAT IS THIS GALCONFESSING.

IS SHE CONFESSING I LOVED MYLITTLE MOANY OR I NEVER

MISSED -- MEGAN.

>> I LOVE MY PONY.

>> LET'S FIND OUT.

>> IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN MY LITTLEMOANY, I THINK YOU MIGHT WATCH

IT ON THE HUB OR SOMETHING.

AND FOR SOME REASON IT'S SUCH AGOOD SHOW.

>> YES, YOU'RE RIGHT.

A 250 MEGAN.

>> HER WHOLE LIFE IS IN BLACKAND WHITE, THAT'S AWESOME.

>> THAT'S HOW PONY'S SEE.

>> I NEVER LISTEN TO A SONG OR ILIKE KETCHUP.

SCOTT AUKERMAN.

>> SHE LOVES KETCHUP.

>> LET'S FIND OUT.

>> I LOVE KEVIN UP.

-- KETCHUP.

>>[LAUGHTER]

>> MY FAVOR THING IS MY BACKPACKWHICK GARFIELD OR MY FAVORITE

THING IS MY FANNIE PACK WHICH ISMARL DO.

>> I'M GOING TO SAY GUARD FIELDBECAUSE SHE HAS GARFIELD COLORED

HAIR GOING THERE.

>> LET'S FIND OUT.

>> MY BACKPACK WHICH ISGARFIELD.

>> GARFIELD.

>> I'M SORRY.

>> GARFIELD.

>> I THINK HER FAVORITE THING ISSHAVING HER EYEBROWS AND THEN

DRAWING THAT -->> SHE KEEPS HER EYEBROWS INTO

GARFIELD.

SHE HAS A FANNIE PACK SHAPEDLIKE A LAW SAWING KNOW AND THEY

DO NOT GET ALONG.

IS THAT A THING DRAWN ON HER.

>> THAT'S CHAINS WHICH ARE VERYDANGEROUS BECAUSE YOU JUST WANT

TO ATTACHED IS THAT A WALLET.

>> IT'S TIME FOR THE FINAL SPEEDGAME.

ONE OF REDDIT'S POPULAR FEATURESIS ASK ME ANYTHING WITH COLLECT

TEASE AND/OR OTHER INTERESTINGPEOPLE OR FROM THE REDDIT

COMMUNITY.

OUR VERSION IS SIMILAR ALTHOUGHFOR EACH FUNNY QUESTION YOU ASK

YOU GET 250 POINTS BUT TODAY ARESTAURANT IN PHILLY UNVEILED A

NEW TWINKIE BURGER WELCOME TOYOUR HEART ATTACK.

JUST IN CASE YOU GUYS AREWONDERING WHAT THAT IS, THAT'S A

PORK BELLY PATHY BETWEEN ATWINKIE BUN CHOPPED WITH CHEESE

AND FOR GOOD MEASURE TOPPED WITHEXTRA BACON.

THE THING WITH TWINKIES ISTHEY'RE NOT SAVORY SO.

COMEDIANS, I'M THE NEW DEEPFRIED TWINKIE BURGER.

ASK ME ANYTHING.

60 SECONDS ON THE CLOCK AND GO.

YES MATT BESSER.

>> IS THAT BACON STRIP YOURTONGUE OR YOUR DICK.

>> A FAIR QUESTION.

YES, SCOTT AUKERMAN.

>>AN I GET YOU AS A LETTUCEWRAP.

>> MEGAN.

>> WILL YOU CAUSE EXPLOSIVE ORJUST GOOD OLD FASHION DIARRHEA.

>> THAT'S IT.

>> IS THAT A PHOTO OF YOU BEFOREYOU EAT IT OR AFTER I VOMIT YOU.

>> MEGAN.

>> WHAT KIND OF DIABETES WILL IGET FROM YOU.

>> THAT'S A FAIR ENOUGHQUESTION.

YES.

>> DID YOU EMERGE FROM PAULADEAN'S [BLEEP]

[LAUGHTER]>> I THINK THE CORRECT ANSWER IS

YES.

YES, SCOTT AUKERMAN.

>> THERE'S PROBABLY SOMEONEBETTER TO ASK BUT WHERE DO

BABIES COME FROM.

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