Forty Percent Leadbelly

  • Season 7, Ep 714
  • 07/03/2013

At a maximum security prison, Bender meets a famous folk singer and attempts to make a copy of his precious guitar.

I can make an exact copyof this guitar.

Tell me, Dr. Beeler.

Will I need to threaten you?Not at all.

You see, nowadays we can takea unique and beautiful object,

and easily reduce it to aformula for mass production.

I call the process"science."

I'll just need to locate

that guitar imageon your file system.

(giggles)

Whoa, that's a lot of porn.

Where'd you storethe guitar picture?

I don't know.

I mainly hang out in here.

Ah-ha, your folk singing folder.

I'll just double-kick on that.

(grunts)

Got it.

Now I'll convert that guitarimage to a wire-frame model.

There, like so.

And send it wirelesslyto my 3D printer.

(beeping)

By laying down layer after layerof nano-plastic,

it can turn your wildest dreams

into ordinary reality.

Witchcraft! Sorcerer!

Neat.

So, how longwill it take?

Four or five hours.

Shall we adjournto the porn folder?

Have you found a railroad manto write a song about?

Yep, my good friend

Big Something here.

Uh, Caboose.

I'm a steel-drivingman,

and there ain't much moreto say about me.

Not till now there wasn't.

♪ Well, Big Caboose wasa steel-drivin' son of a gun ♪

♪ Till a bad-hearted womanhe spied... ♪

But, Bender,

I never spiedno bad-hearted woman.

In my songyou did--

a temptress named--I don't know-- Jezebel.

Wow, creativity's hard work.

(slurps loudly)

Ah.

You know my favoritepart of your song?

The part whereit ended. (laughs)

Then, settle in, 'cause that'sabout a half hour from now.

♪ Well, Jezebel's heartdid wander ♪

♪ When she sawthat ramblin' man ♪

♪ He was talland dark and shiny ♪

♪ And a native Mexican.

That sleazy rambler soundsan awful lot like you, Bender.

Hey, thanksfor noticing.

Just for that, I'm gonnaslip you into the 57th verse.

You can be my best friendwho abandons me when I need you.

Now, that's a versewe can all enjoy.

♪ Well, Rodriguez ran

♪ To his best friend

♪ Said, "Help meor I'll surely be killed" ♪

♪ Fry laughed and he said,"You deserted me once ♪

♪ "Now it's your turnto feel the chill, Lord, Lord ♪

♪ Now it's your turnto feel the chill." ♪

You've accurately portrayedthe nature of my grievance.

(train whistle blows)

♪ Big Caboose went lookin'for Rodriguez ♪

♪ Straightto New New York town ♪

♪ He cried...

Bender, guess what.

I met a fabulous girl andwe're engaged to be hitched.

That's great, Caboose.

Come on in andset a spell.

Aw, no time.

I got someplace to be.

See you soon,honeybunch.

Okay, dumpling.

My man's gone, gone.

Oh, I'm so lonely and easy.

Oh.

(both giggling)

BENDER (à la train whistle):Whoo-whoo.

(both giggling)

Oh, yeah.

This is definitely goingin the song.

♪ He cried, "Rambler,you slept with my Jezebel." ♪

Hey, what'syour name, anyhow?

Jezebel.

Oh, good, I won't have

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