Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV

  • Season 5, Ep 15
  • 03/04/2008

Bender becomes the new star of a soap opera and a bad role model for children everywhere.

Get ready for this part.

Quiet, robot.

Bender's on TV.

Oh, Calculon,

it's so good to getaway from the city

and that beastly yetintriguing Bender.

( gasps )

( gulping )

Whoo!

And try this, kids at home.

Is televisionsensation Bender

a bad role modelfor Earth's children?

( gasps ):That's crazy.

A new protest group, FathersAgainst Rude Television,

says, "Hell, yes."

( scoffs ):What kind of bozos

would starta Bender protest group?

Good news, everyone.

Hermes and I have starteda Bender protest group.

That was uncanny.

Fathers AgainstRude Television

don't want our kids watchingBender's high-definition filth.

And for what?

Some kind of cheap laugh?

That's not what F.A.R.T.is all about.

No, sir.Not us FARTers.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!You can't censor me

just 'cause I'm anobscenely bad role model.

As unclean as it makes me feel,I agree with Bender.

Kids don't turn rottenjust from watching TV.

Yeah, give a little creditto our public schools.

Bender, I'd like youto meet our director

whose nameI never learned.

Yo.

I read the script and I think

it would help my character'smotivation if he was on fire.

Uh, don't worryabout the script, baby.

We rewrote your part to bettersuit your acting abilities.

Oh, now my characterhas a British accent?

No, now your character'sin a coma.

Get in bed and don't move.

( grumbling )

And... action!

( muttering ):Stupid, dumb coma.

Could have been British.

Alas, that my only son

should sink into anirreversible, permanent

( whispers ):coma.

Permanent?

That's completely outof character for Antonio.

I'm getting up.

Curse the tragic wildebeestaccident that...

( rapping ):♪ Hey, everyone! ♪

♪ Antonio here, but youcan call me Bender ♪

♪ I got ants in my buttand I needs to strut ♪

♪ Come on, baby, do, ah, do ♪

( puffing )

♪ Dee, dah, doda, booba,dah, boo, come on ♪

♪ Do, dee,bee, bah, boo... ♪

I'm... not familiar withthe type of thing I'm seeing.

♪ Bite my shiny metal ass ♪

♪ Ooh, yeah, come on,baby, yeah ♪

♪ Ooh, uh, come on, yeah... ♪

Cut!

That's the worst coma actingI've ever seen!

We'll have to shoot it again.

No. No, no, no,I don't do two takes.

But this guy was...

Amateurs like youdo two takes.

I do one take.Print it.

I'll be in mythree-story trailer.