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Extended - Thursday, September 18, 2014 - Uncensored

  • 09/18/2014
  • Views: 5,641

Ali Wong, Tom Rhodes and Neal Brennan guess which sexual tweet about the iPhone 6 got the most retweets, list #PirateTVShows and come up with forgotten jazz greats. (25:37)

RIPPED FROM TODAY'S INTERNET

HEADLINES, THIS IS RAPID

REFRESH.

(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)

GUYS, GUYS, MERRY IPHONE 6 EVE,

EVERYONE.

(HOOTING AND WHOOPING)

OH, I HOPE YOU'VE DECKED THE

HALLS WITH PURPLE MEN'S SCARVES.

(LAUGHTER)

OH, NO, THAT'S NOT...

IT DIDN'T POP ENOUGH FOR ME.

I FEEL LIKE IT NEEDS, LIKE, A

SOUND BITE, LIKE, A DRAMATIC

CHIPMUNK SOUND.

CAN YOU GUYS DO SOMETHING BETTER

WITH THAT?

YEAH, OKAY, I GET THAT.

(LAUGHTER)

THANKS, @ERIC J. UNDERSCORE

DESIGNER, FOR TWEETING THAT AT

US.

COOL GIFT, BRO.

(LAUGHTER)

UH... YES, IT'S THE BUSIEST

SHOPPING DAY OF THE YEAR, AND WE

ARE MERE HOURS AWAY FROM HOLDING

THE LATEST TECHNOLOGY IN OUR

HANDS, AND THEN, DROPPING IT IN

A TOILET, AND THEN, TAKING IT TO

A GENIUS BAR, AND BE, LIKE, "I

DON'T KNOW WHY IT HAS WATER

DAMAGE.

I WASN'T ANYWHERE NEAR WATER."

AND THEY LOOK AT IT INSIDE, AND

THEY GO, "NO, THERE'S A SENSOR

HERE, AND CLEARLY, IT HIT

WATER."

"WELL, I DIDN'T DO IT.

I MEAN, I DON'T...

YOU MUST HAVE DONE IT.

YOUR SWEATY, APPLE GENIUS HANDS

PROBABLY DID THAT.

I DIDN'T DO IT.

I DON'T EVER FUCK ANYTHING UP."

THE EXCITEMENT FOR APPLE'S

LATEST PHONE HAS REACHED SEXUAL

RAPTURE LEVELS.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING COITAL

TWEETS GOT THE MOST RETWEETS?

A: "THE IPHONE 6 AND IPHONE 6

PLUS MADE MY OVARIES BURST.

HASHTAG, I WANT, HASHTAG, I

NEED."

(LAUGHTER)

UH, BY THE WAY, THAT'S NOT HOW

THE FEMALE BODY WORKS.

B: "MY STEPDAD'S SO WET FOR THE

IPHONE 6."

NOT HOW THE MALE BODY WORKS, BY

THE WAY.

C: "I'M NOT EVEN GONNA NEED

PUSSY ONCE THE IPHONE 6 COMES

OUT."

THAT IS NOT HOW THE IPHONE 6

WORKS.

I AM FAIRLY CERTAIN THAT'S NOT

HOW THE IPHONE 6 WORKS.

WHICH ONE OF THOSE THINGS GOT

THE MOST RETWEETS?

YES, ALI WONG.

>> I'M GONNA SAY "C", BECAUSE I

DO THINK IT'S A GOOD

REPLACEMENT, BECAUSE THE IPHONE

6 IS HELLA TIGHT.

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)

>> HARDWICK: YUP, AND, UH...

LADIES, THAT'S RIGHT.

I HAD TO GET THE IPHONE SIX

PLUS.

(LAUGHTER)

LET'S FIND...

WHICH IS ONLY FIVE AND A HALF

INCHES.

UH...

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

I MEAN, DIAGONALLY, YOU KNOW.

LET'S FIND OUT WHICH ONE.

YEAH, C.

(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)

WELL...

ACCORDING TO @ A BAKE 6, ALL

PUSSIES WILL BE OBSOLETE ONCE WE

GET OUR FUTURE PHONES.

(LAUGHTER)

>> I FEEL THREATENED.

>> YOU GUYS ARE ALL SITTING ON

OLD TECHNOLOGY RIGHT NOW.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT NOT EVERYTHING WILL BE

OBSOLETE.

WHAT WILL YOU STILL NEED ONCE

THE NEW IPHONE COMES OUT?

TOM RHODES?

>> UH, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I NEED

NEXT, BECAUSE APPLE HASN'T TOLD

ME YET.

>> HARDWICK: YEAH, THAT'S TRUE.

POINTS.

(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)

MARVEL COMICS HAS BEEN KILLING

IT AS OF LATE WITH THE

ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE NEW FEMALE

THOR, AND, OF COURSE, UH, THE

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY FILM,

WHICH WAS PHENOMENAL.

(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)

AND AVENGERS II COMING OUT NEXT

YEAR, AND THEN, ANT MAN.

WELL, IT'S TIME TO PUT ALL THAT

GOOD WILL TO THE TEST.

FAN BOYS ARE GROUSING MORE THAN

USUAL TODAY, BECAUSE MARVEL HAS

ANNOUNCED A VERY UNUSUAL NEW

SUPERHERO SPONSORED BY A BIG

CORPORATION.

WHO IS THIS NEW QUESTIONABLE

CRUSADER?

A: CAPTAIN CITRUS, A HERO

POWERED BY ORANGE JUICE.

B: THE SCRIPTURE AVENGER, A HERO

WHO CONSULTS THE BIBLE BEFORE

EVERY BATTLE.

C: THE APPLICATOR, A FEMALE

SUPERHERO SPONSORED BY TAMPAX.

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

(BELL DINGS)

YES, NEAL.

>> A.

>> HARDWICK: UH, THE CORRECT

ANSWER IS, IN FACT... A.

(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)

CAPTAIN CITRUS.

THERE HE IS... IN FRONT OF THE

AVENGERS.

HE'S GOT A COUPLE OF ORANGES

TUCKED IN HIS PANTS DOWN THERE.

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

HE WILL FACE OFF AGAINST HIS

GREATEST FOE-- THE

TASTE-OF-TOOTHPASTE MAN.

(LAUGHTER)

I WANT TO SAY, BY THE WAY,

MARVEL HAS, APPARENTLY, LONG

BEEN IN THE POCKET OF A PULPY,

BIG ORANGE.

THEIR HEROES HAVE BEEN SHILLING

FOR THEM FOR YEARS.

LOOK WHAT WE FOUND.

>> I'M GIVING YOU THIS MEDAL AND

A CASH AWARD OF $400...

>> PARDON ME?

>> YES, SPIDER-MAN.

>> FRANKLY, I'D RATHER HAVE...

AN ORANGE.

>> SPIDER-MAN LOVES ORANGES.

(LAUGHTER)

>> HARDWICK: UH, COMEDIANS, THIS

VIDEO LEAVES MANY THINGS

UNANSWERED.

LIKE, WHY DIDN'T SPIDER-MAN JUST

TAKE THE MONEY AND BUY THOUSANDS

OF ORANGES?

FOR BONUS POINTS, WHAT DO YOU

THINK SPIDER-MAN WAS GETTING A

REWARD FOR? NEAL?

>> I'D FIRST LIKE TO POINT OUT

THAT THE TOBEY MAGUIRE

SPIDER-MAN HAS NOT AGED WELL AT

ALL.

(LAUGHTER)

I THINK IT'S A REWARD FOR BEING

THE FIRST WHITE PERSON TO BE

ABLE TO PULL OFF A GOLD

MEDALLION.

>> HARDWICK: YEAH, GOOD. POINTS.

YEAH, OF COURSE.

>> YEAH.

>> HARDWICK: THAT'S WHAT HE GOT

IT FOR.

(APPLAUSE)

IKEA'S MALAYSIAN DIVISION HELD A

CONTEST FOR ITS FACEBOOK FANS,

ASKING THEM TO COSPLAY AS AN

IKEA PRODUCT.

THE WINNER RECEIVED A $250 GRAND

PRIZE, WHICH YOU CAN BUY SEVEN

IKEA COFFEE TABLES WITH.

(LAUGHTER)

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS THE

GRAND PRIZE WINNER?

A: THIS WAKEUP CALL.

(IMITATES ALARM CLOCK RINGING)

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

B: MOLLY-GO-LIGHTLY.

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

OR C: THIS CHILD'S TOY.

NO.

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

WHICH ONE OF THOSE? TOM?

>> UH, A.

>> HARDWICK: THE CORRECT ANSWER

IS, IN FACT... B.

(GROANING)

D'OH!

(LAUGHTER)

THEY'RE NOT LEGITIMATELY

COSPLAYING AS AN IKEA PRODUCT

UNTIL YOU HAVE TO RETURN ONE OF

THEM BECAUSE ONE FUCKING PIECE

WASN'T IN THE BOX.

(LAUGHTER)

THE LAST PIECE THAT YOU HAVE TO

PUT IN!

WHAT IS IKEA'S NEXT CONTEST

GONNA BE? NEAL?

>> A CONTEST WHERE YOU MAKE

THEIR FURNITURE NOT LOOK LIKE IT

WAS MADE IN A PRISON WOODSHOP.

>> HARDWICK: OKAY, GOOD.

POINTS.

(APPLAUSE)

IT'S NOW TIME FOR THE HASHTAG

WARS.

(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)

HEY, ARRRE YOU READY?

IT'S NATIONAL TALK-LIKE-A-PIRATE

DAY.

ARRRE... WE STILL DOING THIS?

(LAUGHTER)

AND INSTEAD OF COMMANDEERING THE

BRITISH ROYAL NAVY'S FLEET, UH,

WE ARE GOING TO CELEBRATE WITH

TONIGHT'S HASHTAG-- PIRATE TV

SHOWS.

PIRATE TV SHOWS.

EXAMPLES MIGHT BE KEEPING UP

WITH THE KARRRDASHIANS.

(LAUGHTER)

OR VERONICA MARRRS.

I'M GONNA PUT 60 SECONDS ON THE

CLOCK STARTING NOW, AND GO.

TOM RHODES.

>> TEENAGE MUTINY NINJA TURTLES.

>> HARDWICK: YES, GOOD.

EXCELLENT. GOOD ONE. POINTS.

ALI.

>> E.RRR.

>> HARDWICK: YES. POINTS.

TOM.

>> THE PLUNDER YEARS.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

GOOD ONE. NEAL.

>> LAW AND ORDER: S.V.RRR.

>> HARDWICK: YEAH, POINTS.

ALI.

>> HOW I MET YOUR WENCH.

>> HARDWICK: YEAH. POINTS.

(LAUGHTER)

TOM.

>> DANCING WITH THE PEG LEGS.

>> HARDWICK: YES. POINTS.

NEAL.

>> THE PARRTRIDGE FAMILY.

>> HARDWICK: YES. POINTS.

TOM.

>> SCURVY YOUR ENTHUSIASM.

>> HARDWICK: PERFECT. POINTS.

(APPLAUSE)

STARRING LARRRY DAVID.

(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)

NEAL BRENNAN.

>> INSIDE AMY SCHUMER.

(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

TOM.

>> IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN SOMALIA.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

ALI.

>> MY SO-CALLED PIRATE'S LIFE

FOR ME.

>> HARDWICK: YES. POINTS.

OH, GOOD ONE. YEAH. NEAL.

>> GAME OF THRONES, BUT I

DOWNLOAD IT ILLEGALLY OFF OF

PIRATES BAY.

>> HARDWICK: YES! POINTS!

IT'S TIME TO PLAY YOU GIVE US

6 SECONDS, WE'LL GIVE YOU THE

WORLD.

AND TO HELP US INTRODUCE THIS

NEXT GAME, PLEASE WELCOME OUR

VINETERN CONTEST WINNER AND

OFFICIAL @MIDNIGHT VINETERN,

MIKE BENNETT.

HI, MIKE.

>> HEY.

>> HARDWICK: SORRY, MIKE, YOU'RE

AN INTERN-- I DON'T SHARE THE

PODIUM.

>> TOTALLY UNDERSTAND.

>> HARDWICK: HOW YOU DOING, MAN?

>> I'M DOING WELL, HOW ABOUT

YOU?

>> HARDWICK: CAN'T LOOK YOU IN

THE EYE, YOU'RE AN INTERN.

>> I UNDERSTAND.

>> HARDWICK: GOT TO KEEP YOU

DOWN.

>> HEY, IT'S TOUGH TO BE A TV

REPORTER THESE DAYS.

>> HARDWICK: TELL ME ABOUT IT,

SISTER.

>> YEAH, YOU...

YOU HAVE TO KEEP UP WITH THE

24-HOUR NEWS CYCLE AND YOU HAVE

TO APPEAR ON AIR KNOWING THAT IF

YOU MESS UP, YOUR HUMILIATION

WILL BE LOOPED ON VINE FOR ALL

OF ETERNITY.

>> HARDWICK: OKAY.

>> SO, UH, HERE'S WHAT I

THOUGHT THAT WOULD LOOK LIKE.

>> HARDWICK: ALL RIGHT.

>> NOW OVER TO MIKE, WHO'S ON

THE SCENE.

THANKS, ROB.

>> HARDWICK: NOT BAD, INTERN,

NOT BAD.

WHAT ARE WE, UH...

WHAT ARE YOU GETTING TO DO THIS,

COLLEGE CREDIT OR SOMETHING?

>> UH, T-SHIRT.

>> HARDWICK: ALL RIGHT.

THANKS SO MUCH, MIKE.

YOU CAN SEE MIKE'S WORK ON THE

@MIDNIGHT VINE ACCOUNT.

GIVE IT UP FOR OUR FIRST

@MIDNIGHT VINETERN.

GET OUT OF HERE, YOU CRAZY...

GET OUT OF HERE.

SO ADORABLE.

HE'S JUST... HE'S LEARNING HOW

TO GROW FACIAL HAIR AND BUTTON

HIS SHIRT.

YOU KNOW THEY GOT TO LEAVE THE

NEST SOMEDAY.

ALL RIGHT, COMEDIANS, I'M GONNA

SHOW YOU A VINE #NEWSFAIL AND

FOR 250 POINTS YOU GIVE ME A

HEADLINE DESCRIBING IT.

FIRST UP, LET'S LOOK AT THIS

SIDEWALK SNEAK-UP.

>> (LAUGHS) WELL, WHY DO YOU

THINK...

>> HARDWICK: I'M, UH... I'M REAL

NERVOUS ABOUT WHERE YOU GUYS ARE

GONNA GO WITH THIS ONE.

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL BRENNAN.

>> I'M A PROMOTER, BRO, COME TO

MY CLUB, COME TO MY CLUB, COME

TO MY CLUB, COME TO MY CLUB.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS, POINTS.

ALI.

>> UH, MAN GETS SHOT FOR

INTERRUPTING WHITE PEOPLE.

>> HARDWICK: TOM.

>> SACHA BARON COHEN PROMOTING

NEW MOVIE.

>> HARDWICK: YES, PERFECT, YEAH.

GOOD, GOOD, ALL RIGHT, NICE.

YOU GUYS DID VERY WELL.

NEXT ONE-- GET HELP, GIRL,

THERE'S TROUBLE AT THE OLD FARM.

>> 500 BIRDS THAT ARE BEING

JUDGED TODAY AT THE SHOW, UH...

AAH!

(BELL DINGS)

>> HARDWICK: NEAL.

>> COCK ATTACKS JIM FOR A

CHANGE.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

TOM.

>> BLACK COCK FRIGHTENS WHITE

MAN.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

ALI.

>> UH, LOCAL COWARD ACTS LIKE A

LITTLE BITCH.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

ALL RIGHT, THEN THERE'S THIS

FORGETFUL ANCHOR.

>> GOOD EVENING, I'M OPRAH.

(LAUGHS)

(BELL DINGS)

>> HARDWICK: TOM.

>> SET DESIGNER STILL FEELS "47"

NOT BIG ENOUGH.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS, I LIKE...

POINTS, YES, WELL DONE.

UH, NEAL.

>> STEDMAN GETS FIRST BONER IN

YEARS.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

NICE, NICE.

>> I USED TO WRITE FOR TV.

>> HARDWICK: ALI.

>> UH, NEWS ANCHOR SAYS WHAT

EVERY WOMAN IS THINKING.

>> HARDWICK: GOOD, POINTS,

POINTS.

YOU'RE GETTING POINTS AND YOU'RE

GETTING POINTS AND YOU'RE

GETTING POINTS!

(CROWD WHOOPING, CHEERING)

HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY--

YOU GUYS AREN'T GETTING

FUCKING POINTS.

NEXT ONE-- THIS REPORTER ON

ASSIGNMENT:

>> ABC 7... WOULD YOU NOT EAT MY

PANTS?

AAH!

>> HARDWICK: WELL, TECHNICALLY,

HE DID WHAT SHE ASKED-- HE

DIDN'T EAT HER PANTS.

NEAL BRENNAN.

>> JEAN DIED DOING WHAT SHE

LOVED...

BEING ATTACKED BY GOATS.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

OKAY, GOOD.

ALL RIGHT.

LAST ONE-- THIS BEAT REPORTER.

>> ...EITHER WAY, IN THE NEXT

HOUR OR SO...

(CROWD LAUGHING)

(BELL DINGS)

>> HARDWICK: YEAH, I LOVE TO

DROP A GOOD OLD SODOMY BOMB IN

THE BACK OF A VIDEO.

NEAL.

>> COMCAST CUSTOMER SERVICE HITS

NEW LOW.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

TOM.

>> NEWS REPORT FROM INSIDE REST

AREA MEN'S ROOM GOES EXACTLY AS

PLANNED.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

ALI.

>> ORDINARY DAY IN

SAN FRANCISCO.

>> HARDWICK: I MEAN, YOU KNOW...

POINTS.

IT'S TIME FOR OUR NEXT GAME--

PET OR FURRY.

PET OR FURRY.

FURRIES ARE PEOPLE WHO ARE SO

EXCITED TO DRESS LIKE STUFFED

ANIMALS THAT THEIR RED LIPSTICK

POPS OUT.

THE DESCRIPTIONS OF PEOPLE ON

THE FURRY DATING SITE

FURRYMATE.COM ARE DISTURBINGLY

SIMILAR TO THE DESCRIPTIONS OF

PETS UP FOR ADOPTION ON

PETFINDER.COM.

SO I'M GONNA READ YOU THE NAME

AND DESCRIPTION OF AN ANIMAL AND

FOR 250 POINTS, YOU TELL ME IF

IT'S A PET OR A FURRY.

FIRST ONE: SPIRIT RUNNER--

"LIVE, LOVE, NEIGH."

(BELL DINGS)

TOM RHODES.

>> FURRY?

>> HARDWICK: UH, LET'S FIND OUT.

YES!

NEIGH...

THAT'S A FURRY AND A BRONY.

UH, BY THE WAY, JUST IN CASE YOU

WERE CURIOUS TO KNOW HIS FURSONA

DESCRIPTION, I HAVE 12 HORSE

VAGINAS AND ALL OF THEM HAVE

ACTUAL TEETH.

NO WOLF SHITHEADS.

>> I LOVE THE "NO WOLF

SHITHEADS."

LIKE, "I HAVE 12 HORSE VAGINAS

THAT ALL HAVE TEETH, SO I HAVE

STANDARDS."

>> HARDWICK: YEAH, EXACTLY.

>> NO WOLF SHITHEADS, OKAY?

>> HARDWICK: THAT'S WHAT IT IS.

THE LAST WOLF SHITHEAD I LET

INTO MY HEART BIT MY FUCKING

HAND OFF.

NEXT ONE, ROMEO, I WILL LOVINGLY

LICK YOUR FEET.

I WILL LOVINGLY LICK YOUR FEET.

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL BRENNAN.

IT'S TOUGH.

IT COULD GO EITHER WAY.

>> PET.

>> HARDWICK: OKAY, LET'S FIND

OUT.

YEAH, THAT'S A PET.

THAT'S ADORABLE.

THIS IS CHRIS HARDWICK REMINDING

YOU TO SAY NO TO PUPPY DICK

PICS.

NEXT ONE, KONA, HE IS VERY QUIET

AND EASY TO RIDE.

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL.

>> PET.

I HOPE.

I REALLY DON'T KNOW.

>> HARDWICK: LET'S SEE.

OH, IT IS A PET. YEAH.

(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)

NEXT ONE.

CONRAD, SIR CONNIE BEARS THE

TITLE OF "THE COUNT OF HOUSTON"

BECAUSE HE IS A VERY NOBLE

FELINE OF A REFINED NATURE AND

BECAUSE HE IS FROM HOUSTON,

TEXAS.

JESUS CHRIST.

(BELL DINGS)

I COULD FUCKING TELL YOU WHICH

ONE THIS IS.

TOM.

>> FURRY.

>> HARDWICK: YEAH, IT'S PROBABLY

A FURRY.

YEAH, OF COURSE.

(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)

>> IT'S BECAUSE IT'S THE

DESCRIPTION OF SOMEONE WITH TOO

MUCH TIME ON THEIR HANDS.

>> HARDWICK: LAST ONE, SHADE, I

LOVE GOING OUTSIDE EVERY NOW AND

THEN TO CATCH SOME AIR FROM

BEING COOPED UP SO MUCH.

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL.

>> PET.

>> HARDWICK: SOUNDS LIKE A PET.

LET'S SEE.

NOPE, IT'S A FUCKING FURRY.

THAT IS A RABBIT FURRY.

SHADE IS A WINTER RABBIT,

IRONICALLY NOT HAVING MANY OR

ANY LIGHT-COLORED FUR.

MOSTLY TAN.

A WHITE CHEST FRONT, WHITE

FINGERS WITH BLACK GLOVE-LIKE

PATTERNS RUNNING UP TO THE

ELBOW.

HE HAS BLACK HAIR WITH A THIN

NEON-GREEN HIGHLIGHT GOING... I

MEAN, WE CAN SEE ALL THESE

FUCKING THINGS.

WHY DID HE WRITE THAT?

SPECIES: I'LL TELL YOU LATER.

FURRY CODE: I'LL TELL YOU LATER.

>> I'LL TELL YOU... I'LL TELL

YOU RIGHT NOW THAT GUY'S GOT A

KILLER DVD COLLECTION.

(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)

>> HARDWICK: YEAH.

AND NOW LET US LEAP TO OUR NEXT

GAME LIKE JOHN CARTER OF MARS.

IT'S TIME FOR FORGOTTEN JAZZ

MUSICIANS.

(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)

THE MONTEREY JAZZ FESTIVAL IS

THIS WEEKEND.

PRETTY MUCH EVERYONE WHO'S

ANYONE IN THE WORLD OF JAZZ HAS

PLAYED IT.

MILES DAVIS RECORDED AN ALBUM

FROM THIS FESTIVAL IN 1963.

BUT LET'S FOCUS ON SOME JAZZ

MUSICIANS WHO ARE, EH, LET'S SAY

LESS FAMOUS AND SUCCESSFUL.

I WOULD LIKE YOU TO COME UP WITH

AS MANY RIDICULOUS JAZZ NAME

GREATS THAT TIME HAS FORGOTTEN.

OR MAYBE THEY NEVER EXISTED.

I'M GONNA PUT 60 SECONDS ON THE

CLOCK.

AND GO.

(BELL DINGS)

TOM RHODES.

>> THELONIUS SPUNK.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL.

>> KENNY G JR.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

TOM.

>> COUNT HITLER.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

ALI.

>> MOS EISLEY.

>> HARDWICK: YES! OH, SO GOOD!

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL.

>> CLIFF "BABY DICK" REYNOLDS.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

ALI.

>> HERPES HANCOCK.

>> HARDWICK: YES. POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

TOM.

>> BILLIE HOLIDAY INN.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL.

>> THE ONLY ASIAN TRUMPET PLAYER

ANYONE'S EVER SEEN.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

ALI.

>> SNATCHMO.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

TOM.

>> JOHN COME-TRAIN.

>> HARDWICK: YES, POINTS.

(BELL DINGS)

NEAL BRENNAN.

>> LIVES OFF HIS GIRLFRIEND

MCGEE.

>> HARDWICK: YEAH, POINTS.

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