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Oh, Armond

Dr. Armond finds himself under house arrest after being accused of murdering his wife, and the Rich Dicks compose a eulogy for Wen's Grampy Goobie. (21:13)

I'M GUILTY.- OH, DEAR GOD.

- GUILTY OF FALLING

FOR ONE OF THE MOSTBEAUTIFUL WOMEN IN THE WORLD.

- [laughing]OH, ARMOND.

- I DIDN'T MURDER HER, KELSEY.

I NEED YOU TO BELIEVE ME.

BUT JUST IN CASE,MAYBE GET A WHITE BRONCO.

[doorbell rings]

- ARMOND, THE COPS ARE HERE.

AM I GONNA MISS SHANNON?

HELL NO.THAT BITCH WAS WACK.

YOU KNOW, REST IN PEACE.

MAKE ME A FEAST, HO.

[device beeps]

- DR. ARMOND,THIS IS OFFICER LONG.

I'M DETECTIVE SMART.

- YOU MUST BE TO RISETO THE RANK OF DETECTIVE.

- THIS IS MY BEAUTIFUL SONROMAN.

[smack]

- WELL, YOU MUST VERY PROUD.

- FIRST, I HAD TO CONVINCETHIS DETECTIVE

THAT I HADN'T MURDEREDMY WIFE.

BUT ALMOST MORE IMPORTANTLY,

I HAD TO MAKE SURE THAT MY SONHAD THE BREAKFAST HE SO DESIRED.

- WHERE WERE YOU WHEN YOU FIRSTDISCOVERED YOUR WIFE'S BODY?

- I WAS DECIDINGWHETHER TO SEVER HER...

- [screams]

- TIES TO ME.

[squeak]

- DO YOU HAVE ANY ACCESSTO SEDATIVES OR DRUGS?

- ONLY ENOUGH TO KILL A HORSE.

[whip cracks,horse neighs]

- YOU'RE NOT INTIMIDATING MEWITH YOUR FANCY SHIRT.

I KNOW WHAT YOU DID.- IS IT OKAY IF I GO?

- I JUST PREPAREDA FEAST FOR YOU.

- I'M NOT EATING THAT.

I'M GOING TO CHICK CLUBWITH MY FRIENDS.

THIS LOOKS LIKE [bleep].

- BUT THE JOKE'S ON HIM.

MORE FOR ME.

- WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

LIKE, YOUR FACEISN'T EVEN MOVING.

YOUR WIFE JUST DIED.

- WHAT WOULD BEA MORE APPROPRIATE THING

FOR ME TO DO WITH MY FACE?

- HAVE IT MOVE.

- [howling]

SINCE MY TEAR DUCTSARE NOW CLOSED,

THE ONLY WAY I CAN CRYIS THROUGH MY MOUTH.

[howling]

[overlapping howling]

- I FORGOT TO HANG UP,OLD FRIEND.

I'M SENDING OVER MY LAWYERZACK SWORD.

[sword unsheathes]- I'VE NEVER LOST A CASE.

- ♪ MONEY, BIG MONEY,BIG DOUGH, BIG ♪

- OH, MY GOD, OKAY.HOW DOES THAT FEEL?

- HOW DOES WHAT FEEL?- ME BEING INSIDE OF YOU.

- DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH ME,ASPEN.

- WINN?- [clears throat]

- WINN!- [sighs]

- IGNORE HIM.- O.M.G.

ASPEN, CAN YOU STOP [bleep]MY SISTER FOR FIVE SECONDS?

- WEN, THERE ARE, LIKE,ZERO REASONS

FOR YOU TO HAVE THAT ATTITUDERIGHT NOW.

- LISTEN, WINNIE,WE NEED TO TALK, OKAY?

DID YOU EVEN GET THE EMAILI SENT YOU?

- FIRST OF ALL, I TOLD YOUI CHANGED MY NAME TO HEATH.

- AH.- OH, SORRY.

HEATH, DID YOU EVEN GETTHE EMAIL I SENT YOU?

- I AM NOT GOING ONLINE, OKAY?

I TOLD YOU I'M TAKING A "BRARK"FROM THE "INTERNAHT."

- MOMMY JUST CALLED.

GRANDPA GOOBIE IS BASICALLYA VEGETABLE, OKAY?

HE'S A PIECE OF BROCCOLINI.LIKE, HE'S ABOUT TO "DAR."

- OH, MY GOD.OKAY.

- WE NEED TO EULOGIZEGRAMPY GOOBIE,

OR ELSE WE'RE GONNA LOSEALL OF OUR MONEY.

- WELL, THAT SHOULD BETHE HEADLINE, WEN.

- GRAMPY GOOBIE'S BANK ACCOUNTOWNS THIS HOUSE, OKAY?

WE'LL BE HOMELESS PEOPLEIF WE DON'T GET UP THERE.

- OKAY, I HAVE AN IDEA.

WE'LL TAKE MY CAR,WE'LL RIFF OUT THE EULOGY,

WE'LL DO A LITTLE "CURCAINE,"

THEN WE'LL GO TO YOURGRANDFATHER'S STUPID FUNERAL.

AND THEN WE'LL JUSTHIT WINE COUNTRY,

AND WE'LL JUST GETSANCERRE TO THE DUNE.

- I LOVE IT, BUT I CAN'T TAKEANYTHING WITH TANNINS

'CAUSE IT MAKES MY FACE RED.

- LIKE A LITTLE ASIAN GIRL?OH, MY GOD!

NOW I'M ABOUT TO FINISH.

WENDALL, MOVE OUT OF THE WAY,SO I CAN LOOK AT MYSELF.

[grunts]LET'S DO A LATE BRUNCH.

- I'M GONNA "PYURK."

- BRUNCH IS READY!

O.M.G., CONSUELA,YOU MADE US "WARFLES."

- OH, MY GOD,THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL.

LET'S JUST INSTAGRAMMY.- "TURTALLY."

- BUT--UH--

- CONSUELA,HOW'S YOUR BOY DOING?

- STILL SICK.THE DOCTOR DOESN'T KNOW--

- OKAY, I DON'T HAVE TIMETO TALK ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW

BECAUSE WE'RE LEAVING.

CAN YOU PACK US FOR A TWO-DAY?I LOVE YOU.

[horn honks]

- WHAT IS TAKING HER SO LONG?

SUELA, IT'S GETTING DARK!

- SUELA, BEEP BEEP,CHOP CHOP.

- GUYS, WE HAVE TO MAKE SURETHAT WE HAVE EVERYTHING WE NEED.

- CELL PHONE CHARGERS?- YEAH, LIKE SNACKS.

- UM, I BROUGHT THE GAT.

- JUST ONE?- MM-HMM. SORRY.

- I THINK I FORGOTMY PUMPKIN.

- WE NEED TO BRING THINGSTHAT ARE GONNA INSPIRE US.

- O.M.G.! COSTUMES FROMTHE ORIGINAL MOVIE DICK TRACY.

- SUELA, BRING COSTUMESFROM THE MOVIE DICK TRACY.

- [laughing]WORD UP.

- [gasps]WE NEED TO BRING TAMPONS.

- YES, FOR BUTT CHUGS.

- WELL, WE DON'T NEED CONDOMS

'CAUSE I'M GONNA PUT A BABYIN YOU THIS WEEKEND.

- ASPEN, I CANNOT BEWITH A JEWISH BOY

AND RUIN MY BLOODLINE.

MY PARENTS WOULD RATHER MEHAVE A BABY WITH MY BROTHER.

- YEAH.NO POOP IN THE WATER SUPPLY.

- I'M ONLY HALF JEWISH.- UGH!

JEWS ARE A SNOOZE.

- SUELA, WE MISS YOU.WE LOVE YOU ALREADY.

- HASTA LA VISTA, BABY.

- OKAY,THE CAR IS NOT STARTING.

SO EITHER WE HAVEA FULL-ON "BRARKDOWN,"

OR WE'RE OUT OF GAS, WHICH ISFUNDAMENTALLY THE SAME THING.

- OKAY, LET'S JUST MAKEA YOUTUBE

AND SENT IT TO SANTA BARBIE.

- TAKE ADVANTAGEOF THE DIGITAL AGE.

- YOUTUBE--YOUTUBEULOGY.

- ARE YOU ON MOLLY RIGHT NOW?

- MY MO--MY MOUTH'S NOT"WORSING" ANYMORE.

- YOU'RE SO HIGH ON MOLLYRIGHT NOW, YOUR HEART IS OPEN.

LET'S GET YOU ON-CAMERAIMMEDIATELY.

- LET'S KILL IT.- I WANNA TOUCH SOMETHING.

- SUELA, UNPACK FOR US.WE'RE STAYING IN.

CHANGE OF PLAY-PLAYS.

WELCOME TO GRAMPY GOOBIE'SEULOGY VIDEO.

- WE HOPE THAT OTHER PEOPLEENJOY THIS

WHEN THEY PLAY ITWHEN YOU DIE

'CAUSE WE KNOWYOU WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE IT

'CAUSE YOU'LL BEIN THE GROUND.

[cheerful music]

EARLY LIFE.

- I AM GRANDPA GOOBIEAS A YOUNG MAN.

I'M HORNY.

- WARTIME.

- GRAMPY GOOBIEIS SIGNING UP FOR THE WAR.

WAR II.

HITLER'S ROLLING FOR POLAND.

- OH, NO, IT'S DICK TRACY.AHH!

- OH, NO.

- BLOOPER REEL.

- WE SHOULDN'T BEDOING THIS ON-CAMERA.

[bleep] IT,LET'S JUST DO IT ON-CAMERA.

VERITE.

IF GRANDPA GOOBIE COULD BEANY ANIMAL IN THE WORLD,

WHAT ANIMAL WOULD HE BE?

- UM--- PILLS.

- [laughing]

- REST IN PEACE.

[laughter]

- KILL BILL, BRO.

[screaming]- CUT MY NECK!

- I FEEL LIKE--LIKE,"HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM,"

AND THE PROBLEM ISTHAT THERE'S NOT ENOUGH LOVE.

THE LACK OF LOVE IS REALLY HARDFOR ME TO HANDLE RIGHT NOW.

- A BAPTISMAL, WENDALL.LET'S DO IT!

YEAH!

- THAT MUST HAVE BEENHARD TO DO.

- OH, MY GOSH, YEAH.IT WAS SO--

I'M SO WET.I'M SO WET.

- I'M SO WET TOO.

- WHAT THE [bleep]IS GOING ON?

GRANDPA GOOBIE WOULDN'TWANT THIS THIS WAY.

- GRANDPA GOOBIE IS DEAD!

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