I'm not making this up -- he goes 'Now if your neighbor marries a box turtle, that doesn't affect your everyday life. But that doesn't mean it's right.' I think it's pretty safe to assume that, at one point or another, Senator John Cornyn has thought about making love to a box turtle. I'm sorry, but that's not the first animal you jump to when you're writing that analogy.
The stand-up storytelling web series from CC:Studios will return in television form.
Check out the list of comedians who taped specials in Boston in March.
Unlimited streams and downloads of the best Comedy Central specials for just $5.
Stream hours of the best clips from our huge stand-up library on your iPhone or iPad for free.