If you live with a woman and she has a job and you do not have a job, when she gets up to go to work, you get up and do something -- anything. Just put some work boots on and sit on the porch until she leaves. Get your old shirt from when you used to work at Taco Bell, say, 'Tony called, says he needs me for the lunch rush.' Make her think you got something to do. Women don't like when you just lay on their couch all day.
Watch highlights from season one and find out why that's great news.
Get full episodes of your favorite shows on the Comedy Central app.
Unlimited streams and downloads of the best Comedy Central specials for just $5.
Stream hours of the best clips from our huge stand-up library on your iPhone or iPad for free.