I am Jewish; my girlfriend's not. She did buy me eight presents for Hanukkah, though. I was like, 'Why did you buy me eight presents for Hanukkah?' She's like, 'Eight presents, for the eight nights of Hanukkah.' I was like, 'You idiot, there's 32 nights of Hanukkah -- and I like electronics. Now, go to the mall. Religious minimum: $50 a gift.'
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