I'm not going to give my organs to anyone unless I meet them first. That's how I live. It's like, 'You want my eyes?' 'Yeah.' 'What do you do for a living -- what are you going to be looking at?' 'I work for Playboy.' 'Oh, s**t -- take them now. Just take one. You take one, I'll keep one, we'll look at the proof sheet like pirates.'
Watch highlights from season one and find out why that's great news.
Get full episodes of your favorite shows on the Comedy Central app.
Unlimited streams and downloads of the best Comedy Central specials.
Stream hours of the best clips from our huge stand-up library on your iPhone or iPad for free.