FAQ: Human Mating

It's a delicate, disgusting dance.

The human mating ritual is cloaked in mystery. But thanks to painstaking research, we can now answer a few questions about it. Here are some of the more common ones. (For educational purposes only.)

Q: Is human mating dignified in any way?
A: No.

Q: How much masturbation is involved in human mating?
A: Lots.

Q: Are human males’ expectations ever realistic when seeking a mate?
A: No.

Q: Does the emotional pain and psychological stress of human mating cause some people to break down completely?
A: Probably.

Q: Is human mating still worth it?

A: Somehow, yes.

See how human mating works below. And if you attempt it yourself, be ready for a long, humiliating journey.