International Stupidity Update

Finally, the dumb get their due.

It’s been a banner week for poor decision-making, and not just in Washington. Since it’s Friday and the dysfunction in our own country will almost certainly be here when you return, step back and take in some of the stupidity happening overseas.

GOOD AT SOCCER, NOT AT SPEAKING—not-coming-to-america
The haze of victory can be powerful enough to cloud a man’s judgment. In this case, soccer pro Mohammed Anas made the ill-advised choice to thank both his wife and his girlfriend after a big win. Way to go, guy. This is kind of like scoring an “own goal” in your personal life.

AH, TO BE YOUNG AND DRUNK–if-you-re-a-dumbass-
Turning from the haze of victory to the haze of drunkenness, Ronny Chieng apprised us this week of the case of Lee De Paauw, an Australian teenager who jumped into a crocodile-filled river to impress a girl. He was bitten, of course, but she also agreed to a date. Good luck finding a lesson in that.

There you have it. On the bright side, our propensity for dumbness unites us all as a species. On the other hand, people apparently get rewarded for it, so who the f**k knows?