Jeff & Some Aliens & Some Sex

Whether you're human or alien, getting physical can be complicated.

Even under normal circumstances, sex has the potential to be awkward. When you introduce aliens (and alien technology) into the mix, it gets…well, much more awkward. Here’s what we mean.

  • SOULMATE SEX

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    Let’s say you were given access to an alien gadget that created a vivid simulation of what life (and sex) would be like with your soulmate. And let’s say that said soulmate was a beautiful movie star. It’d be pretty great, right? Unless, of course, you developed an unhealthy, stalker-ish obsession with said person in the real world. Which you almost certainly would.

  • ALIEN CUCKOLD SEX

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    This one kind of speaks for itself. We’re not sure how common it is, but if you’re an alien who works long hours on a distant planet, you should maybe ask yourself what your spouse is doing during those long, cold nights.

  • TERRIFYING MEMORY SEX

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    Where to begin? OK, so if you’ve got an alien device that can alter your friends’ memories, be sure not to take advantage of them with it. Otherwise they might use it against you, turning your past romantic foreplay into a hellish nightmare. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

  • REGULAR HUMAN SEX

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    Still pretty mysterious and bizarre.