With the crybabies and fake news media calling him the “Mobster President,” this commander-in-chief has decided not to take it as an insult — after all, mobsters know about being great bosses. Instead, he’s turned to some real-life former gangsters to see what he can learn from them.
At first glance, it looks like this president has the makings of a dyed-in-the-wool mob kingpin. He’s got the clothes and the attitude down, and he samples from “Goodfellas” so liberally that you’d think he does Robert De Niro cosplay.*
But when the president actually chats with these old-school mobsters, their differences emerge. From his Twitter use to divorce, the guys have some problems with the president’s behavior. (And the less said about their feelings toward his relationship with his daughter, the better.) Nevertheless, they’re all able to bond over a shared distaste for federal investigators, which seems to go a long way in these circles.
At the end of the day, our commander-in-chief might never be able to be a real mobster president, but he’s the closest we’re likely to get in our lifetimes. Now go enjoy some capisce with mozzarella.
*Please let this be a real thing.