On this week’s episode, Jim pitched billionaire investor and reality TV star Mark Cuban his patented* new invention: a foot pedal that lifts up the toilet seat. Unfortunately, Cuban passed on the grounds that it has “already been done,” and, in fact, one of his companies currently produces them.
His loss. But it could be your gain! Here’s why you, right now, should make the life-changing decision to invest in the Laissez-Faire Lavatory, the bipedal potty for the bipedal pooper.
IT’S A PEDAL
As Cuban points out, many Japanese bathrooms are already fitted with buttons on the wall that lift toilet seats. But who wants to touch a cruddy button, especially one that’s sitting next to a toilet all day? With a foot-activated pedal, your hands stay germ-free. Plus, as Jim’s promotional poster says, pedals are fun and improve ankle strength. Can buttons do that? We didn’t think so.
JIM WILL THROW IN A HOODIE
Depending on how chilly you are right now, this could be the deciding factor for you. Made from a cotton and polyester blend, the official Jim Jefferies Show hoodie is so comfortable that you’ll forget you just blew $10 million for 2% of a toilet pedal company.
YOU’LL BE ABLE TO CLAIM MARK CUBAN AS A REAL-LIFE NEMESIS
How many people can say they got to stick it to Mark Cuban? Sure, he owns a company that makes a similar device, but clearly the guy hasn’t marketed it in the U.S. yet, or else we’d be swimming in toilet pedals. Now’s your chance to beat Cuban: Tap into the germophobe market that he’s neglecting, and you could make your fortune.
*Don’t fact-check this, please.