Even by 1902 standards, Hamish is filthy and off-putting. Here’s how to behave like Bellacourt Manor’s most unsavory employee.
BE GROSS AND MEAN
Anyone can be gross or mean, but it takes a special kind of refinement to be both at once. Therefore, no matter the occasion, you must look for ways to be hostile and upsetting. Try calling a coworker an idiot or casually bringing up any sexual viruses you may be carrying.
KIDNAP PEOPLE FOR MONEY
Show off your politeness: Abduct a friend under false pretenses at their own request. Just be sure you smell bad while doing it.
BECOME AROUSED BY KNIVES
Propriety is about saying the right thing at the right moment. For Hamish — and now for you — that means saying something perverted when there’s a knife at your throat. Now go forth and be dignified.