Dog Time - Hard-Hitting Dog News

Tuesday, January 26, 2016 01/26/2016 Views: 185

Man's best friend loves a good op-ed piece, so Affion Crockett, Jenny Zigrino and Marlon Wayans list articles that might appear in an issue of TIME magazine for dogs. (1:49)

As we go to our next game,

Dog Time. Dog Time.

Photobombs, like everythingin life, are always better

when they involve dogs. Always.

We found a delightful bunchof dogs photobombing pictures

on DogTime.com.

For example, here's a classic.

Uh...

Got the dogwith the tat sleeves there.

He's probably driving a hybrid.It's a Labradoodle.

Um, now, as wonderfulas that is, I have to admit,

I was a little disappointedto learn that DogTime

wasn't just Time magazinefor dogs.

I mean, think of allthe hard-hitting dog news.

So, comedians, since I can makeyou do whatever I want

on my program, I would like youto list as many articles

as you can that might appearin Time magazine for dogs.

Uh, examples might be"This year's best tennis balls

rated for chewiness"or "Why your farts

shouldn't startle you." Uh,

I'm gonna put 60 secondson the clock. And begin.

-Jenny.-"Are you a basic bitch?"

Points. Points.

Affion.

"How to bark all the timelike an asshole

when you livein an apartment building."

Points. Jenny.

"Five things you should knowbefore you eat that chocolate."

All right, points.

Marlon Wayans.

"How to break upwith your owner."

Points. Affion.

"The top ten porches it would beperfect for you to die under."

Points.

Jenny.

"Ten hot celebrity legsperfect for humping."

Yes, points. Marlon.

"Squirrel-on-squirrel action."

Squirrels, squirrels, squirrels!

Points. Affion.

"Your owner--really your best friend

or some asshole who lost moneyon you in a dog fight?"

Points.

Jenny.

"How to bring that spark backinto the bedroom

when you've lost your balls."