#HashtagWars - #MyCampaignIn3Words

Monday, June 15, 2015 06/15/2015 Views: 203

As the presidential election season begins, Margaret Cho, Dave Hill and Matt Lucas condense political platforms into bite-sized taglines. (2:17)

IT'S NOW TIME FOR TONIGHT'S#HASHTAGWARS.

I HAVE TO BE HONEST WITH YOU.

THE WRITERS ACTUALLY FOR#HASHTAGWARS WANTED TO DO

#CELEBRITREES, LIKE SPRUCEWILLIS, SHRUBBY CHECKER OR

SARAH JESSICA POPLAR. YOU KNOW,CELEBRITREES. AND I WAS LIKE

YOU KNOW WHAT? WE CAN'T. EVEN IHAVE LIMITS. AND I'M PRETTY

WHOREY. SO LET'S MOVE ON FROMTHAT AND TO GET INTO THE

PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION SPIRIT,TONIGHT'S HASHTAG IS INSTEAD

SOMETHING A LITTLE MORECIVICALLY-MINDED,

#MYCAMPAIGNIN3WORDS.EXAMPLES MIGHT BE GUACAMOLE NOT

EXTRA, OR EIGHT INCHES SOFT.

OR MONEY PUSSY WEED! I AMTELLING YOU SOME

PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE'SGONNA HAVE THE BALLS

TO DO THAT ONE DAY AND THEY'REGONNA (BLEEP)ING WIN

BUT FOR NOW I WILL PUT60 SECONDS ON THE

CLOCK AND BEGIN.

YES, DAVE HILL.

>> SUCK IT CANADA.

>> Chris: POINTS.

MARGARET CHO.

>> EATIN' AIN'T CHEATIN'.

>> EDDIE VAN HALEN.

>> POINTS.

DAVE HILL.

>> GAY FOR PAY.

>> Chris: POINTS.

MARGARET CHO.

>> YES, WEED CAN.

>> Chris: POINTS.

MATT LUCAS.

>> MORE SPIDER-MAN REBOOTS.

>> Chris: I'M GONNA GIVE YOUPOINTS

ALTHOUGH I'M NOT SURE YOU WOULDGET ELECTED ON THAT PLATFORM.

>> YOU ARE USING UP THE PRECIOUSTIME, MAN.

>> Chris: I AM SORRY.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

MARGARET CHO.

>> SMOKE WEED E'RY DAY.

>> Chris: DAVE HILL.

>> JUST THE TIP.

>> JUST THE TIP.

>> Chris: SWALLOW IT, BITCH!