Rapid Refresh - Her Vagina Is Her Muse

Monday, October 27, 2014 10/27/2014 Views: 169

Dannah Phirman, Alison Becker and Rob Corddry guess which Taylor Swift fan tweet got the most retweets and then learn about a futuristic airplane feature. (3:56)

RIPPED FROM TODAY'S INTERNETHEADLINES, IT'S RAPID RERESH.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

NOW, TAYLOR SWIFT IS A LOT OFTHINGS TO A LOST PEOPLE.

SHE IS A INSPIRATION, A MOGUL, AROLE MODEL. BUT TO ME SHE'LL

ALWAYS BE THE TEMPTRESS WHOBROKE JOHN MAYER'S HEART.

BY THE WAY, IF YOU [BEEP] HER,SHE'LL WRITE A SONG ABOUT YOU.

IT'S JUST -- THAT'S HOW ITWORKS.

HER VAGINA IS HER MUSE.

IT'S LIKE A MAGIC MUSIC BOX --YOU PUT SOMETHING IN IT AND IT

JUST SPITS OUT POP HITS.

THIS WEEK TAY-TAY DECIDED TORELEASE HER NEW ALBUM "1989" 47

MINUTES EARLIER THAN PLANNED ANDHER FANS LOST THEIR

SELFIE-LOVING MINDS.

WHICH OF THESE REAL AND VERYENTHUSIASTIC FAN TWEETS GOT THE

MOST RETWEETS.

A, 1989 SOUNDS SO (BLEEP) NICEI'M PUCKING GLITTER RN BECAUSE

EVERYTHING IS PERFECT HER VOCALSARE PERFECT THE MEL-OID-IES ARE

PERFECT JESUS CHRIST.

[ APPLAUSE ]

B, I WAS SO EXCITED ABOUT 199 INTHE CAR MY NOSE STARTED

BLEEDING.

OH NO. YOU MIGHT GOT THEEBOLAS.

C, I'M LISTENING TO 189 AND OTHINKING I AM GIVING BIRTH,

DYING, PUKING AND CRYING AT THESAME TIME.

UH, YES, ALISON BECKER.

>> I AM GOING TO SAY C, TEENPREGNANCY IS TO HOT RIGHT NOW.

>> CHRIS: OH MY GOD YOU GUYS,DO YOU HAVE A PREGNANCY PACT?

DID YOU MAKE A PREGNANCYPACT. OH MY GOD.

THE CORRECT ANSWER IS A.

NO POINTS.

NOSE BLEED, PUKING, SHAKE ITOFF.

[LAUGHING]

>> Chris: COMEDIANS, BASED ONTHOSE TWEETS, WHAT ARE SOME

SOTHER SYMPTOMS TAYLOR SWIFTFANS MIGHT EXPERIENCE FROM

EXPOSURE TO HER NEW ALBUM.

ALISON BECKER.

>> LADY BONERS THAT LAST UP TOFOUR HOURS.

[ APPLAUSE ]

>> Chris: POINTS. ROB CORRDRY.

>> TWO THINGS.

HEARING LOSS OR LOSS OF INTERESTIN HEARING.

>> Chris: OK.

[LAUGHING]

DEFINITELY POINTS.

NEXT ONE.

ACCORDING TO BUZZFEED IT WON'TBE LONG UNTIL YOU'RE FLYING THE

FRIENDLY SKIES IN A WINDOWLESSPLANE.

YES, BY TAKING THE WINDOWS OUTOF THE PLANE THEY CAN REDUCE

FUEL COSTS, MAKE THE SEATS WIDERAND FREAK THE [BEEP] OUT OF

CLAUSTROPHOBICS FOR HOURS, ANDHOURS, AND HOURS.

BUT THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, BEFORETHE END OF THE FLIGHT, FREAKING

THE (BLEEP) OUT OF ACROPHOBES.

TAKE A LOOK.

>> OFFERING SCENIC PANORAMICVIEW AND ENTERTAINMENT.

INFORMATION AND INSIGHT AT YOURFINGER TIPS.

IT'S TIME TO START YOUR JOURNEY.

>> Chris: AHH!

THE WINDOWS WILL BE REPLACEDBY VIEW SCREENS THAT SHOW YOU

WHATEVER IS RIGHT OUTSIDE THEPLANE, LIKE MASSIVE STORMCLOUDS,

OR OTHER PLANES OR GREMLINS ONTHE WINGS, BILL SHATNER.

OR JOHN LITHGOW, DEPENDING ONTHE TWILIGHT ZONE YOU SAW.

ONCE YOU GET TO CRUISINGALTITUDE, I'M SURE THE SCENES

WILL BE REPLEACES WITH EPISODESOF "BIG BANG THEORY" OR SOME

(BLEEP), LIKE ALL THE WAYTHROUGH --

THESE GIANT INTERNAL VIEWSCREENS WILL NOT BE CHEAP, SO

COMEDIANS, WHAT IS ANEXCITING INNOVATION YOU CAN

EXPECT FROM LESSER, BARGAINAIRLINE IN THE FUTURE?

DANNAH.

>> THERE WILL BE PEDDALS ATEVERY SEAT TO KEEP THE PLANE IN

THE AIR -- ACTUALLY, SPIRITAIRLINES IS ALREADY TRYING THAT.

>> Chris: -- ALREADY TRYING TODO THAT. OKAY, GOOD, POINTS.

[ APPLAUSE ]

>> Chris: ROB CORRDRY.

MORE LEG ROOM, BUT, SORRY, LESSFOOT ROOM.

>> Chris: OK.

ALRIGHT, ROB CORRDRY, POINTS.

[ APPLAUSE ]

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