Extended - #HashtagWars - #GotDumpedBecause - Uncensored

Extended - Thursday, July 30, 2015 - Uncensored 07/30/2015 Views: 210

All the scorned lovers out there can take solace in Matt Oberg, Suzi Barrett and Seth Morris's tales of breakup woe -- and the reasons they saw it coming. (1:45)

IT'S NOW TIME FOR TONIGHT'S#HASHTAGWARS.

THERE'S NOTHING QUITE AS PAINFULAS GETTING DUMPED.

BUT WHEN IT HAPPENS, ALL YOU CANDO IS PICK YOURSELF UP OFF THE

FLOOR AND TELL YOURSELF YOU'REBETTER OFF.

ALSO, PRAYING YOUR EX ONE DAYCONTRACTS A DEBILITATING DISEASE

THAT SPREADS THROUGH THEIRENTIRE CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM

HELPS AS WELL.

SO IN HONOR OF ALL THE SCORNEDLOVERS OUT THERE, TONIGHT'S

HASHTAG IS #GOTDUMPEDBECAUSE.

EXAMPLES MIGHT BE, UH,"I PERISCOPE ALL OUR FIGHTS."

OR "SHE COULDN'T APPRECIATE MYCOLLECTION OF MICROSUEDE THONG

UNITARDS."

UH, I'M GONNA PUT 60 SECONDS ONTHE CLOCK, AND BEGIN.

SETH.

>> I LOOK LIKE THE BRAWNY PAPERTOWEL GUY.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

SUZI.

>> UH, BECAUSE APPARENTLY WOMENAREN'T ALLOWED TO HAVE THEIR OWN

OPINIONS AND I'M SUPER RACIST.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

MATT.

>> I CAN'T DO PULL-UPS AND IDON'T DO PULL-OUTS.

>> HARDWICK: POI...

POINTS.

SUZI.

>> UH, FOR BIRTH CONTROL I JUSTKEEP MY NYLONS ON.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

SETH.

>> MY FAVORITE SEX ACT IS MINIONPLAY.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

>> SUZI.

>> UH, I CAN ONLY MAKE OUT IFKIDZ BOP IS PLAYING.

>> HARDWICK: OH, POINTS.

UH, MATT.

>> MY NAKED BODY IS OFF-PUTTING.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

SUZI.

>> UH, MY UNDIES SMELL LIKECREAMED MEAT LOAF.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS.

SETH.

>> I GIVE OUT RAISINS ONHALLOWEEN.

>> HARDWICK: OH...

YOU PIECE OF SHIT, HOW COULD YOUDO THAT TO A CHILD?

POINTS.

SUZI.

>> I CLEANSED MY BUTT PLUG INHIS CONTACTS CUP.

>> HARDWICK: THAT IS A TINY BUTTPLUG.

>> NOT TO ME.

>> HARDWICK: POINTS, POINTS.