James Adomian - Gay Villains

James Adomian, Jessi Klein, Pete Holmes Season 4, Ep 3 08/09/2013 Views: 21,193

James Adomian hopes to one day spend a night on the town with Ursula the Sea Witch. (3:00)

Hey, guys!

I just want to come outand let you know I'm gay.

I'm a gay person.

I go straight to gay.

That's the way I do it.

I always tell people that,because I don't necessarily

scan gay to everybody, like ina supermarket checkout sense.

Like, beep.


Beep, gay.

And then it gets to me andit's like, Oh, we've got to

manually key this one in.

There are, like, adversitiesthat we face as gay people.

There's negative perceptions,

the media, and probably theworst one of those is the

archetype of the gay villain,which you see everywhere.

You see a gay villain in a lotof cartoons, a lot of movies.

It usually involves someonewith a thin moustache that

says, "Hmm, facial grooming.

Something must be afoul."

But they-- They have tohint at it like that.

They can't just come outand be like,

"Hey, the bad guy's the [BLEEP].

Watch out, you'll thank me."

It's not always just badguys, either.

Sometimes they're girlcharacters that's a gay

villain, because it'simportant to make gay girls

feel bad aboutthemselves too, right?

That's why we have "The LittleMermaid" and the main bad guy,

Ursula, the Sea Witch!

"I'm a big [BLEEP]with a butch haircut!"


What's the problem?

"I got black lipstick and a[BLEEP] with tentacles coming

out of it."


"Stay away!"

And I'm like, no.

Every time I've ever met awoman like that in my real

life, she's been awesome.

That's the woman thatgoes, "You know what?

The bar is closed, but I tellyou what: lock the doors.

One round on me."


"I got eight tentaclesand eight beer taps.

We're all getting[BLEEP] up tonight.

If you don't lose your voicepartying with me, you're doing

it wrong, because I'mdrinking all night."

All I'm saying is if you knowa gay villain, go to them.

They're probablyworth a good party.

But you would never know thatif you saw the last James Bond

movie, "Skyfall," that cameout last year, because

Javier Bardem plays the mostobvious gay villain of all time.

He enters the moviewearing a white

linen suit with an ascot, and

he's like, "Sachet,sachet, sachet.

Isn't terrorismfabulous, Mr. Bond?

Well, well, well.

Look at you, James Bond.

So weak here in my hackerdungeon, hacking and licking

and leaking and hacking.

I'm an evil, gay hacker.

Yes, because if there'ssomething scarier than

WikiLeaks, it's gay WikiLeaks.

Look, my teeth come out.

Are you ready for somefiendish fun, Mr. Bond?

Or maybe it's my turn.

Double over, 007."

Why does that-- Whyis he the bad guy?


Remember the big gayterrorist attack?

No, that never happened.

You remember the war,where all those

gay people killed thosepeople?

Nope, that was straightpeople.