Chris D'Elia - Cool Voice

  • Season 15 , Ep 5
  • 01/11/2011
  • Views: 34,458

Chris D'Elia questions why Japanese people add syllables to words for no reason. (2:28)

HOW ARE WE--ARE WE GOOD?

[cheers and applause]

- ALL RIGHT--COOL, MAN.

I DON'T KNOW, MAN--I DON'T LIKE MY VOICE,

[audience laughing]

'CAUSE I HEAR IT.

NOW, YOU EVER HEAR YOUR OWNVOICE, RIGHT, LIKE, RECORDED,

AND THEN, YOU--YOU'RE LIKE,

"WAS THAT REALLY ME--IS THAT-- RIGHT?"

OR I GOT A VOICE RECORDER,AND I'LL RECORD MYSELF,

AND EVERY TIMEI-I LISTEN TO IT LATER,

I'M ALWAYS LIKE,"WHO SNUCK IN

"AND RE-RECORDED OVER MY--LIKE, THAT DOESN'T"--

LIKE, I'LL RECORD--I'LL BE LIKE,

"BEFORE 5:00 P.M. TOMORROW,I GOTTA PICK UP MY LAUNDRY

"TO HAVE THAT SHIRTFROM THE DRY CLEANERS.

"I NEED ITFOR THE PARTY."

AND THE NEXT MORNING,I'LL WAKE UP.

I'LL BE LIKE,"WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO?"

AND I'LL PLAY IT.

"PICK UP THE LAUNDRYBEFORE THE 5:00 P.M."

[audience laughing]

IT'S LIKE, WHENDID I TURN INTO

AN OLD JAPANESE DUDE--I DON'T REMEMBER THAT.

HEY, THERE,I AM JAPANESE.

YOU KNOW OLD JAPANESE DUDESSOUND LIKE THAT, RIGHT?

I DON'T KNOW WHY--HA-DA-DA.

THEY ADD SYLLABLES TO WORDS,TOO, FOR NO REASON.

JUST HA-DA I AM, UH,THE JAP-ADA-NESE-AH.

[audience laughing]

IT, UH, IS, UH, NICE,UH, TO MEET YOU.

LIKE, THEY DO!

YOU KNOW HOW THEYSAY "MCDONALD'S?"

THEY SAY IT LIKE THIS:"MC-ADO-DONO-ALDS."

[audience laughing]

[applause]

I WANT, UH, CHICKEN-A-DOON-AMC-A-DO NUGGETS

[audience laughing]

FROM MC-ADO-DONO-ALDS-AH.

THAT'S HOW THEY DOIT, TOO, LIKE THAT.

I DON'T KNOW, MAN.

I WANNA HAVE A COOLVOICE, YOU KNOW?

LIKE, HELLO,HELLO, HELLO.

THAT'S COOL-- HELLO--WHAT'S GOING ON?

HELLO, HELLO--I'M BRITISH.

YEAH, THAT'S TRUE--YEAH, HELLO.

I FEEL LIKE THAT'SHOW BRITISH DUDES

WAKE UP IN THE MORNING--JUST "HELLO."

[audience laughing]

AND THEIR WIFE-- THEIR WIFEJOLTS AWAKE TO HIS "HELLO!"

THEIR KIDS HEAR IT--HELLO, HELLO!

THEIR NEIGHBORSHEAR THAT.

HELLO, HELLO, HELLO,HELLO, HELLO!

[audience laughing]

THAT'S HOWBRITAIN WAKES UP.

ONE GUY--

[audience laughing]

ONE GUY WAKESUP REAL EARLY,

AND JUST SAYS, "HELLO,"AND THEN, "HELLO!

HELLO, HELLO, HELLO,HELLO, HELLO!"

[cheers and applause]

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