Power - Creedocide

  • Season 1 , Ep 2
  • 02/18/2009
  • Views: 201,411

A new pest control promises to get rid of rats the spiritual way. (1:44)

>> male announcer:RATS, RATS, RATS.

YOU'VE TRIED TRAPPING THEM,POISONING THEM.

YOU'VE EVEN TRIED BRIBING THEM.

IT'S TIME YOU TRIEDTHE ONLY RAT POISON

THAT HARNESSES THE POWEROF RELIGION,

CREEDOCIDE.

HERE'S HOW IT WORKS.

FIRST, UNWRAP YOUR CREEDOCIDEDECOY RAT.

NEXT, RELEASE THE DECOYINTO YOUR WALL.

THE IMPOSTER RAT WILL LOCATETHE RAT NEST

AND DISGUISE HIMSELF AS THE SONOF A MONOTHEISTIC SUPREME BEING.

HE WILL SHARE HIS MESSAGEOF LOVE AND CHARITY

WHILE PERFORMING MIRACLESAND PREACHING A GOSPEL

IN OPPOSITIONTO CONVENTIONAL RAT LAW.

HE WILL THEN BE EXECUTEDAND REBORN,

'CAUSING RATS EVERYWHERETO PRAY TO HIM.

AS THE CHRISTIAN RATDEVELOPS A FOLLOWING,

SIMPLY INSERTA SECOND DECOY RAT

INTO A DIFFERENT PARTOF YOUR HOME.

HE WILL FINDANOTHER GROUP OF RATS

AND CLAIM TO HAVE TRANSCRIBEDTHE LITERAL WORD OF GOD.

EAGER TO WORSHIPTHE ONE TRUE RAT GOD,

THE RATS WILL SUBMIT TO SHARIA,OR "THE WAY."

AT THIS POINT,THE CHRISTIAN RATS

WILL GET WINDOF A NEARBY GROUP OF RATS

THAT HAS NOT YET HEARDTHE WORD OF THEIR LORD.

THEY WILL INVITE THE MUSLIM RATSTO WORSHIP THE RAT CHRIST.

THE MUSLIM RATSWILL REJECT THEIR OFFER.

AND THE CHRISTIAN RATSWILL ATTACK

IN ORDER TO RECLAIMTHE HOLY LAND

AND CONVERT THE MUSLIM RATS.

[metal clanging and gunfire]

THE MUSLIM RATS WILL RESPOND

WITH A SERIESOF GUERRILLA ATTACKS

MEANT TO WEAKENTHE CHRISTIAN RATS' RESOLVE.

THIS WILL IGNITEAN EPIC HOLY WAR IN YOUR WALLS

THAT SHOULD LASTFOR ABOUT 72 HOURS

OR UNTIL YOUR HOMEIS 100% RAT-FREE.

>> MY RODENT PROBLEM IS OVER.

PLUS, I CAN FEEL GOODKNOWING THAT MY RATS ARE DYING

FOR SOMETHING THEY BELIEVE IN.

>> announcer: CREEDOCIDE,HARNESS THE POWER OF RELIGION.

[applause]

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