Dan Soder - Time to Stop Smoking

  • Season 4, Ep 6
  • 08/30/2013
  • Views: 6,837

If Dan Soder hadn't lost a football game 116-0 as a child, he might have become an a**hole as an adult. (2:16)

Why are we trying tostop kids from losing?

You're supposed to losewhen you're a kid.

If you lose enoughas a kid,

you don't grow upto be an [BLEEP].

That's what happens.

Like, I played Little Leaguefootball.

And in sixth grade,my football team and I

lost to another team

116 to 0.

You don't even need to knowsports to go,

That's a messed-up score.

But I think it made mea much better adult,

because I learnedabout humility.

Like, what if Iwould have won 116 to 0?

I might be an [BLEEP] now.

Or even worse.I might have grown up

to be one of those guys whotakes his shirt off like this.

I might be one of those guys.

I hate that guy.

You're not supposed to havethat much confidence.

You're supposed to pullyour arms through the sleeves

and then turn offthe lights

before anyone seesyour doughy torso.

I don't do sit-ups.I got Netflix.

I don't know. I think it mightbe time to cut back,

or stop smoking weed,

because it's beena good run.

I'm just not-- You know, I'm notinto it the way I used to be.

Like, when I first startedsmoking weed,

I was very aggressiveabout letting everyone know.

I was like,"Smoke weed every day!

Smoke weed every day!"

And now I'm almost 30.

I'm like, "Yeah, I, uh,I smoke weed every day.

"It's kind of a problem.

"I have no motivation.

God knows wheremy keys are."

Because when you start,they warn you.

They're like,Don't do too much of this,

or you're going to becomea pot head.

You're going to becomea burnout.

I used to hear thatand I was like,

I'm never goingto become that.

Ever.

Five days agoI witnessed a car accident.

And my only reaction was,

Oh, no!

I am hungry.

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