Maria Bamford - Monster

  • Season 11 , Ep 10
  • 02/15/2007
  • Views: 23,716

Maria Bamford pitches an idea for a sitcom. (1:35)

IT'S GONNA BE CALLED ME, MY MOM AND A MONSTER.

AND MONSTER HAS NO CREDIT HISTORY

SO WE ALL GOT TO LIVE TOGETHER.

MY MOM'S, LIKE, "HONEY, WE CAN'T LIVE WITH A MONSTER.

"HE'S 80,000 POUNDS. AND HE HAS HIS,

"YOU KNOW TINY LITTLE CLAWS UP IN THE ATTIC

"AND THEN HIS GIANT HINDQUARTERS IN THE GARAGE.

AND THERE'S NO PLACE TO SIT DOWN."

"MOTHER, HE HAS NOWHERE TO GO."

[MONSTER SPEAK] "MONSTER HAVE NOWHERE TO GO."

- [GRUMBLING] - [LAUGHTER]

AND THEN THE MONSTER STARTS BORROWING MY CLOTHES, RIGHT,

AND I'M LIKE, "YOU CAN'T WEAR MY CAPRI PANTS.

YOU'RE TOTALLY STRETCHIN' 'EM OUT."

[GRUMBLING] [MONSTER SPEAK] "CAPRI PANTS.

[GRUMBLING CONTINUES] CAPRI PANTS."

AND THEN-- YOU KNOW-- THE--HE AND MY MOM START HANGIN' OUT.

AND I'M LIKE, "WHERE ARE YOU GUYS GOIN'?"

AND SHE'S, LIKE, "HONEY, WE'RE GOING TO CHURCH."

"MOM, THE MONSTER DOESN'T UNDERSTAND RELIGION." "HONEY, HE LOVES TO SING."

[GRUMBLING]

[MONSTER SPEAK] ♪ JESUS

[GRUMBLING, SNORTING]

AND THE MONSTER WILL BE PLAYED BY DAME JUDI DENCH.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

Loading...