Richard Lewis - Chevy Nova

Dana Gould & Judy Gold Season 1, Ep 0123 02/24/1992 Views: 663

Richard's mom had a Chevy Nova with a computer in it. (1:47)

I HAD AN UNCLEWHO LIVES IN SANTA MONICA.

I DON'T THINK JEWS COULD EVERBE EXPLORERS, QUITE FRANKLY.

I'M GLAD COLUMBUS WAS NOT A JEW.

HE LIVES SO CLOSE TO HEREAND HE SAYS--

I SAID, "THAT'S A RED LIGHT,WE CAN'T GO.

"NO, THAT'S NOT A RED LIGHT,ISN'T THAT A...?

I THINK THAT'S...THAT'S AN OUTHOUSE, ISN'T IT?"

"NO, NO, IT'S A RED LIGHT."

AND WE START DEBATING

WHETHER WAS IT AN OUTHOUSE,WAS IT A RED LIGHT

THEN FINALLY, ALL RIGHT,IT'S A LIGHTHOUSE.

THERE'S... WE CAN GO.

"LET'S GO, UNCLE SOL, COME ON."

AND MY MOTHER...I USED TO TAKE TRIPS

WITH MY BROTHER AND MY SISTERAND MY BROTHER AND MY...

WITH MY MOM AND DADAND... GEEZ.

MY MOTHER'S FIRST CAR WASA CHEVY-- I THINK IT WAS A NOVA.

I'M NOT SURE WHAT IT WAS.

HAD A COMPUTER IN IT, YOU KNOW.

YOU PUT THE KEY IN,IT SAID, "HELLO."

BUT I THINK SHE PUT,FOR ANOTHER HUNDRED BUCKS

LIKE, A JEWISH RABBI IN THERE

THAT WENT, "IT'S DRIZZLING OUT,WHY ARE YOU EVEN LEAVING?"

( laughter )

YOU KNOW.

SO, YOU KNOW, I CAN'T TRAVEL.

I... IT'S A NIGHTMARE.

( laughter )

IT IS!

NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.

WELL, YOU KNOW.

I MEAN, THEY SCREAM, THEY...

I MEAN, MY FAMILY,I SWEAR TO GOD

THEY ARE FOUR ARGUMENTS SHORTOF SYNDICATION, I'M NOT KIDDING.

AND THEN, NOT THAT I'M NOT FUNNY

BUT MY FAMILY, THEY'RE SOBORING, I MEAN, AND I...

AND ANYONEWHO'S WATCHING, YOU KNOW

I DON'T MEAN YOU, YOU KNOW.

BUT WE ACTUALLY WENTTO SAN FRANCISCO FROM JERSEY.

WE PULLED OUT OF THE DRIVEWAY

MY MOTHER WASJINGLING SOMETHING.

I SAID, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

SHE SAYS, "I HAD THE TOLLS READYFOR THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE."

I WENT, "OH, WOW, WHAT A TRIPTHIS IS GOING TO BE."