Owen Benjamin - Car Horn Vocabulary

Owen Benjamin: High Five Til It Hurts Season 1, Ep 101 06/28/2013 Views: 12,194

If there were multiple car horns to express a full range of emotions, Owen Benjamin would be a much happier driver. (2:04)

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I was at a red light recently.

And the light turned green,

and the guy behind me honkedfor me to go.

Has that ever happenedto you guys?

The light turns green.[imitates car horn]

I'm like,"Dude, it just turned green."

I'm like, "You don't talkto me like that."

I got nowhere to go.

All I do is watch Pawn Star marathons.

I'm a pretty simple guy,you know?

So I just throw it in park.

I'm like, "Now nobody goes."

He's like...[imitates car horn]

I'm like, "No, buddy, legally,that says I can go."

And the dudejust keeps honking.

I'm like,"No, you don't yell at me!"

Right? And then later I realizedI was totally wrong, right?

I may have been wrong.

Maybe he was a dick.Maybe he wasn't.

But I know that he hada limited vocabulary.

Because I was in a parkinggarage, and I was behind a car.

And the thing went up.And I was like...

[imitates car horn]And the dude was like, "What?"

I was like, "I meant itin a helpful way."

And then it dawned on me,there is no courtesy horn.

There is no helpful horn.

We need a second hornthat's mellow,

that ends in a question mark,that's like...

[gently honks]Like...

[laughter and applause]

[gently honks]

It's just kind of being like,"You're cool, man.

I just want to knowif you see something."

[gently honks]

I mean,driving would be awesome.

If you were at a red light,it turns green, you just hear...

[gently honks]

I'm like, "Thanks, man."I hit--

And then I'd hitmy thank you horn...

[brief honk]and go.

Thank you, crowd.[brief honk]

And then there should beanother horn--

I'm thinking a bunch of them.

I want a whole array.

I want emotions up there.

I want another horn that says,"I'm not mad at you,

it's the personin front of you."

I feel really bad.

Like, I want to get outof the car and actually explain

to someone what's going down.

Like, I'm like...[imitates car horn]

Someone's like,"What, dude?"

I'm like,"No, we're bros."

[imitates warbling horn]"It's that guy.

Go!It's a yield sign."

[chuckles]